This week Marko wanted to hear a story of cursed love, so Corrigan recounts the tragic mystery of the Mayerling Incident, which inadvertently led to WWI. Cursed indeed!

[0:00] Corrigan tells the story of the Mayerling Incident
[47:15] Marko wonders if any of our listeners are dead, Corrigan indulges her special interests, and Hades II is out
[01:02:40] What we watched: Lost Boys, Demon Knight, Strange Harvest, Night of the Reaper

[0:00] Marko tells Corrigan about the horrors of space
[32:08] Apparently the Rapture is here! Who will saaaaave your soul?
[39:56] It's not a podcast, it's a record of the AI-pocalypse
[49:34] Some JoAG related stories listeners have sent us, including Capgras syndrome and parthenogenesis
[01:08:24] Mark shares some head canon
[01:22:05] What we watched: Sketch, Beyond the Poseidon Adventure, Bad Shabbos, Lost Boys, District 9, Red Rooms, Handling the Undead, Masking Threshold

Listen: We know you've googled it this week. So, today we're gonna try to get to the bottom of what the hell a groyper is and whether we should care.

[0:00] Corrigan tells Marko about the absurd and terrifying right wing posse known as Groypers
[56:20] Marko tells Corrigan about the joys of CEX, lizard parthogenesis, and the CoLD scale, all of which leads us to a chat about what we'd really like to see on the news
[01:26:16] Some Ko-Fi updates, plus Corrigan talks about Banana Ball and we just keep thinking about touching grass

This week we talk about how religions define martyrdom, whether it reeeeeally counts according to their own texts, and how any group is convinced to go to war. Plus, CoRri closes out her thirties, we talk science illiteracy, and we bicker over some movies!

[0:00] Marko discusses warriors from Samson of the Bible to modern suicide bombers, and what it means to be a martyr
[39:35] Marko talks about dumb shit he's done, it's Corrigan's last day in her thirties
[48:40] We discuss health fads, science confusion, and WHO BENEFITS
01:03:42] Mark talks about rediscovering the brilliance of Metal Gear Solid
[01:13:00] What we watched! (The Omen, Together, I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, Now Voyager, Dead Ringer, The Naked Gun

Holy smokes! We've been doing this thing for five years! To celebrate, Corrigan tells a horrific historical banger, we discuss some of our favorite stories and films from the last five years, and we make a big announcement! Thanks for sticking with us, friends!

[0:00] Corrigan tells Marko the story of the Great Hinckley Fire, which has haunted her since she first read about it
[01:04:40] We do some reflection on the last five years of podcast and whether we feel like it's been a net positive in our lives, and exactly how MUCH of our lives this show has taken up
[01:17:38] What we didn't foresee about the world five years from when we started
[01:33:00] Mark talks about the only video he's ever noped out of, and CoRri talks about an audio clip Marko sent her that she noped out of, and we talk about WHEN IT HAPPENS
[01:40:40] Our favorite movies and our favorite JoAGs from the past five years
[02:06:25] The big announcement!

Corrigan explains to Marko how Pizzagate and Q-Anon unmoored the United States, and we have a chat about the racism white men tend to perpetuate in their movies about racism.

[0:00] Corrigan tells Marko about conspiracy theories that have shaped the last decade of American politics
[01:02:20] We have a watch-along coming (Slime City Massacre) on August 23rd, we discuss our weird mortality thoughts as Corrigan is weeks out from her 40th birthday, and Corrigan tells a story of accidentally getting high
[01:18:50] What we watched:  Rockula, The Invisible Man, Eddington, Weapons, Rear Window
[01:40:00] We discuss why Corrigan found Eddington harmful

Recently it's become popular for economists to say we're in a "vibecession," and we're all imagining that everyone's broke and struggling. This week Marko lays out the hard numbers about societal collapse.

[0:00] Marko gives Corrigan some statistics about societal collapse
[48:20] We discuss other podcasts we may or may not listen to, anticipate the new Alien TV show, and talk about Shrewsbury
[01:00:26] Interesting listener things on our discord, and a reflection on the fragility of male gamers
[01:12:19] What we watched: The Game, The Naked Gun, Jurassic World Rebirth, Weapons, The Day After Tomorrow, Spider-Man: No Way Home

In 1965, AstroTurf was created. This has made a lot of people dead or maimed and been widely regarded as a bad move.

[0:00] Corrigan tells Marko about the happy little forever chemicals in the fake grass that covers our parks and sports facilities
[56:45] We unpack the implications of the cold open, Corrigan explains the Presidential Fitness Test
[01:13:30] What we watched: War of the Worlds, Apollo 13, The Exorcist III, The Fantastic Four, KPop Demon Hunters, Rope, La Haine, 28 Years Later, Cold Skin

Humans have been obsessed with the end of the world for millennia which means, hey, you have options! Let's talk about end times alternatives to our climate nightmare.

[0:00] Marko and Corrigan discuss different views of the end times from various religions and cultures around the world
[47:45] Boatcore! Marko sees a 16th century ship of death, and Corrigan reads a shipwreck book
[01:05:15] Marko talks about his mental health being a bit of a dick, and discusses a recent feature of capitalism he hates
[01:15:15]] What we watched: Dangerous Animals, Knowing, Hell of a Summer, Happy Gilmore 2, Fantastic Four: First Steps, K-Pop Demon Hunters, M3gan 2.0

Corrigan finds out some shocking decades old information about the horrific end of gorilla lady Dian Fossey, we discuss how absurd the mechanisms of the human body are, and we consider an alternate timeline in which we aren't causing our own demise.

[0:00] Corrigan tells Marko about the murder of Dian Fossey
[40:56] We weigh whether the outcome of the gorilla conservation efforts we just discussed justify the means
[44:53] Marko questions how the human body is possible and it leads to a discussion of alternate timelines in which we didn't screw things up so bad
[01:11:26] What we watched: Slime City, The River Wild, The Monkey, Dexter: New Blood , Superman, Tron, M3gan 2.0, Ghost: Skeletour