Today, we again are under the cloud of another mass shooting. Also, just as we were reaffirming our freedom from tyranny, the Gops are passing their mega-cruel, mega-despotic, mega-deadly, mega-totalitarian, mega-ignorant, mega-MAGA bill.

David Walman would be addressing the above, but presently David's at the wheel of the KITMmobile passing through golden valleys, fruited plains, etc., and therefore put together this brand-new prerecorded KITM!

Ever think that customer service has pre-determined a level of discomfort that you will need to endure in order to earn the favor of their attention? Well, you are correct! They save money through attrition of disgruntled customers, not the cultivation of satisfied ones… and that kids is how destroying the United States makes business sense. The Social Security Administration will be designed to become the flagship of FUBAR, as destroying the will of new parents and senior citizens promises the most in profit and satisfaction. Now, even Big Balls is facing shrinkage, as DOGE loses access to grants.gov. This frees up a few hundred million in grants that they had disappeared in order for them to expire. (Profit!) Meanwhile, Donald K. Trump personally froze $7 Billion in school funding in his new Shits and Giggles Initiative.