Kicking and Screaming Podcast

In this adolescent episode, Elijah challenges Vanessa to find the perfect horror pairing to Baby Assassins, which is unfortunately not set in the Boss Baby cinematic universe. After revealing a little too much about how she "played" with Barbies as a child, Vanessa counters with another top-notch tale of teenage terrors: Tragedy Girls. But how much does a slasher have in common with an assassin? Why do Vanessa and Elijah always pretend that the titles of the movies are a surprise? And which animals could Elijah confidently Judo throw? Find out, in this week's double-feature discussion!  

The official snack pairing of Baby Assassins and Tragedy Girls is instant ramen and spiked prom punch.  

This episode was brought to you by teen angst.

(This episode is also brought to you by our editing software not working)

In an episode that was surgically removed from its larger twin, Vanessa challenges Elijah to find the perfect martial arts pairing to the body horror masterpiece Basket Case. After explaining why Belial is his brother, Elijah counters with the twin Van Damme-sterpiece that is Double Impact. But after an extended hiatus, will Vanessa and Elijah remember how to host the show? Is it possible to have too much Van Damme? And how did Vanessa and Elijah spend their break from the show? Find the answers to all these questions and more, in this week’s double-feature discussion!  

The official snack pairing for Basket Case and Double Impact is a double-double with Mike & Ike’s.  

We’re back, baby.

In an episode passed on through generations by word of mouth, Elijah challenges Vanessa to find the perfect horror pairing for one of the greats of martial arts cinema, Fist Of Legend. After being utterly derailed by a cat, Vanessa counters with Jayro Bustamante's La Llorona (2019). But what does a vengeful spirit have in common with a martial arts hero? How much will Vanessa cry in this episode? And is it the La Llorona you're thinking of? Find out, in this week's double-feature discussion!  

The official snack pairing for Fist Of Legend and La Llorona is sopa mein.  

This episode was brought to you by undercranking.

In this flashback-heavy episode, Vanessa challenges Elijah to find the perfect martial arts pairing for recent horror favorite Censor. After Vanessa recovers some previously-censored memories of her own, Elijah counters with one of the greatest samurai films of all time: Harakiri. But what does the tragic tale of a down-on-his-luck ronin have to do with a British film censor in the 1980s? Is the world bleaker than ever, or is there cause for optimism? And what games has Vanessa been playing lately?  

The official snack pairing of Censor and Harakiri is s’mores.  

This episode was brought to you by class solidarity.

In this seafaring episode, Elijah challenges Vanessa to find the perfect horror pairing for Yuen Woo Ping's Red Wolf. After firmly establishing that xylophones are not villainous, Vanessa counters with another tale of death on the high seas: Deep Rising. But besides their nautical settings, how much do these two films really have in common? How are Vanessa and Elijah planning to pay for their new editing equipment? And what's the most cursed Air BnB Vanessa has ever stayed at? Find out, in this week's double-feature discussion.  The official snack pairing of Red Wolf and Deep Rising is baked Alaska with calamari.  This episode was brought to you by Goldie the orb weaver.

In an episode best listened to while wearing 3D glasses, Vanessa challenges Elijah to find the perfect martial arts pairing to the, we’ll say it, underrated slasher My Bloody Valentine 3D. After offering to accept any and all challenges to a pickaxe fight, Elijah counters with a film he specifically had underrated: True Legend. But what does the origin story of a martial arts folk hero have in common with a massacre in a mining town? What was Vanessa’s earliest intrusive thought? And when are we finally going to get the #VanessaCut? Find the answers to all of these questions and more, in this week’s double-feature discussion!  

The official snack pairing of My Bloody Valentine 3D and True Legend is a heart-shaped box of liquor-filled chocolates and you have to eat the whole thing in one sitting and then drunk-text someone.  

This episode was brought to you by executive dysfunction.

In an episode with strong maternal instincts, Elijah challenges Vanessa to find the perfect horror pairing for Vietnamese actioner Furie. After establishing that Vanessa has finally entered the “annoying” stage in her journey as a fan of martial arts movies, Vanessa counters with the slasher titan that is Friday the 13th. But what does the summer camp slasher have in common with Furie? Why has it taken so long for them to cover a Friday the 13th movie? And does Pamela Voorhees have superpowers? 

Get the answers to all of these questions and more in this week’s double-feature discussion!  The official snack pairing of Furie and Friday the 13th is s’mores made with fancy Vietnamese chocolate. (Probably the brand Marou, which Vanessa and Elijah discovered only after recording)  

This episode was brought to you by hard-working single moms who do it all.

In an episode that also serves as a loving parody of previous episodes of this podcast, Vanessa challenges Elijah to find the perfect horror pairing for one of his most-quoted films of all time: Black Dynamite. After talking for longer than you’d expect about boomerangs, Elijah counters with another one of his most-quoted films of all time: The Editor. But can anything really measure up to Black Dynamite? Is Malignant a giallo? Will their cat Kyle successfully stop the recording? Get the answers to all of these questions and more, in this week’s double-feature discussion.  

The official snack pairing of Black Dynamite and The Editor is a waffle in the style of a zeppole and, regrettably, malt liquor mixed with espresso AKA “Homemade Four Loko”  

This episode was brought to you by boomerangs.

In this landmark episode, Vanessa and Elijah cover their first ever listener-submitted double-feature. First up is the fantastically-titled Scott Adkins actioner Avengement. After cursing our reality for being one in which Scott Adkins is not the most successful actor alive, Vanessa and Elijah move on to its perfect horror pairing, (which just so happens to be one of the greatest horror films of the decade) Green Room. How much does a horror movie about punks fighting neo-Nazis have in common with Scott Adkins spin-kicking mobsters? Why are specifically jiu-jitsu guys always looking for a fight? And if Vanessa's such a tough guy, why does Elijah want to kiss her so bad? Find the answers to all of these questions and more, in this week's double-feature discussion.  

The official snack pairing of Avengement and Green Room is a spiral-cut hot dog topped with pickled egg.  

This episode was brought to you by friend of the podcast and all around rad person Gareth (@WoodsRunning) who submitted this week's picks!

In this howlin' good episode, Vanessa challenges Elijah to find the perfect martial arts pairing for what is almost definitely the best werewolf New Year's movie, The Wolf Of Snow Hollow. After firmly establishing that Officer John Marshall is not a great guy, Elijah counters with another tale of a small town in the throes of lycanthrope violence, Brotherhood Of The Wolf. But how much does this French period piece really have in common with The Wolf Of Snow Hollow? What are the werewolves metaphors for? And which actor made Vamessa turn into a (horny cartoon) wolf herself? Find the answers to all of these questions and more in this week’s double-feature discussion!  

The official snack pairing of The Wolf Of Snow Hollow and Brotherhood Of The Wolf is Moon Pies and jerky.  

This episode was brought to you by The Committee For Better Werewolf Martial Arts Films.