Well gang, here we are. It might not be the end of the road. It might just be a great big semicolon blocking our way for the moment. If you want to find out what happens next, and if we get past it, subscribe now. Then, when, if we do anything in the future, you'll definitely get to know.

In the meantime, we had fun at Crossness. Fiona found connections and call backs in Hounslow. But mostly it's William Derham of Havering. The astronomer Vicar who borrowed a massive telescope and propped it up on his church tower to change the way we thing about the universe. Oh and calculated something that had stumped Isaac Newton no less. Getting his neighbours to fire canons left, right and centre, but never neglecting his parishioners. He sounds like a good egg.

*this semi colon is almost certainly be used wrong.

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Quite leafy Ruislip, a typical London suburb, was home to Helen and Peter. He was a 2nd hand book dealer and....... well, what else? And why did Helen end up commemorated on a stamp?

I'm not going to tell you now, you'll have to listen to find out. Can you work it out before Alex does?

Hillingdon has jumped the queue, Havering will be next week. Plus random cat news, and dappled shade in the street.

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We're often called clowns. I'm sure it is meant nicely. In any case, this week we take a look at one of London's most unusual events, the Clown Service every year in East London. We also trace back the history of clowning, and find where the traditions that we know and love (or are scared of!) originate

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Alex takes us to the North London borough of Harrow. Eschewing the school and it's many celebrity alumni, we are retiring to the country instead.

When Sir William Gilbert bought a house in Harrow, it came with a resident animal, who quickly became a family favourite. So much so, when he died, they acquired a new pair. What were they? There were also cats and dogs and donkeys. But it's Nancy's pet that provokes the most questions.

We are talking of WS Gilbert, creator of plays and comic operas, with his long time collaborator Arthur Sullivan. Who retired to Grim's Dyke and along with his wife created marvellous gardens and a fateful lake. Indeed it's not a long episode this week, because of the lake, and the swimming lessons he was giving to the locals.

It's now a hotel, so maybe there's an outing in the offing. There's definitely an outing in the offing, with more Crossness details this week. And lions and canals and bears, Oh my!*

Who was Grim, and what was the dyke for?

*There aren't any bears.

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Never has paying rent been quite so elaborate. Even when it's rent you're not paying, for a piece of land you don't use anymore. It's confusing. The City of London goes to town with the pomp and processions, and we are here to explain all. In fact this year (unlike all the others) we are determined to make it to some of these events. Get your diaries at the ready if you'd like to join us.

There's the Boar's Head procession, by the Butchers. The Carmen do the cart marking. City Freemen with their sheep crossing the river. And 61 nails getting handed back and forth, for eternity. Every year since.... well, who is going to have the oldest ceremony? It's a lost in the mists of time face off between Fiona and Alex. We don't just cross the river, we go upstream for the Doggett's Coat and Badge, and then even further up to check who owns those swans.

I want to hear "Good service" "Good Number" and "Whack it boys, whack it!"

A lesson for us all. John Stow's inscription: "Either do things worth writing about, or write things

worth reading". Here at Ladies Who London we hope we do things worth talking about, and talk about things worth doing.

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Hello Haringey. From Highgate to Tottenham, and the cemetery to Bruce Castle, we flit West to East and back again. Fiona's long been fascinated by a film clip, and turns out both the filmmaker and the subject have Haringey connections. So this week we are talking about the magician David Devant and the cinema pioneer Robert Paul.

Roll up, roll up, roll up, for the Kinetescope, the Animatograph and the Filoscope. And cheer loudly for the Prince of Wales. (In fact there's two mentions for the Prince of Wales this week, see if you notice them both, different person, same title.)

Plus Eleanor Morton's dates for the Soho theatre. Who else had a whistle at the Burlington Arcade? How much for a plot? And which dictator's relations lived in Haringey?

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Fiona hits the streets in search of the sound of London. Or at least the sound of the bells of London. From the Westminster the the City and beyond, listening as the hours pass by and the years drop away. Listening to the echoes of sounds that Londoners heard 300 years ago.

What's a carillon? How long does it take to ring a peal? How heavy? And can we start making them here again please.

Of course there's Big Ben, and Great Tom, and Dick gets a mention, can anyone find a Harry?

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In which Alex tells us why a Hungarian dancer was instrumental in fixing the distance for the marathon. It's a journey that takes us all the way from Pest to Chicago and from Hammersmith, through the Court of Honour, via some more dodgy colonial model villages and out to Windsor.

Theatrical and event impresario Imre Kiralfy created the area we now know as White City*, to host events and exhibitions. Including the Franco-British Exhibition of 1908. What else happened in 1908? Well Rome was due to host the Olympics.

Plus Fiona met a Zoomer, Indoor swimming, bad signposting and a family success.

*What colour do you think the buildings were painted?

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Get your pencils and paper ready to join in with us. Alex has prepared a quiz, Fiona has fun facts to share and special guest and friend of the pod Lee Ingleby is putting on a brave face for all of it.

Which tube station is the opposite of Squander? What weighs the same as 200 ping pong balls? We're not just testing your London knowledge this week, we're testing your mathematics and spelling too. What links a rocking horse, a 14 ft boat and some breast implants? Settle in for a rollercoaster of things you never knew you needed to know*.

Plus a plea for love from another friend of the pod and the world premiere of the Christopher Wren Alert.

*You probably don't, and in some cases certainly shouldn't.

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This week it's the rose red empire of Hackney famous residents from the 1500s. We discover why Alex didn't watch Wolf Hall. She's a sensitive gal you know.

And we go way back to 600bc, before returning, via the world's first coal powered electricity generating station, where? Really!? How Extraordinary! To the bright lights and power hungry pubs of Shoreditch in the late 1800s. Time for some civic minded Victorian engineering, to produce: More Light, More Power. The unassuming brick building on Coronet St hides a powerful past life, disguised now with the glitz, glamour and muscles of steel needed for aerial circus skills.

Plus Crossness dates - 5th Apr, get in touch if you want to join us at the pumping station. Important Hat news, Rev and Amazing Grace, and at some point everyone lives near Krapy Rubsnif.

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