Have you ever tried to comfort a loved one in distress, only to have your reassurance blow up in your face?
Not only did your advice, consolation and sympathy not work, it seems to have added to their distress.
And to top it all off, now you're in trouble for adding to the problem!
When someone shares their pain or problems with you, there are 10 Non-Empathic Responses that you want to avoid at all costs.
Advice: "Here's what you should do..." "Have you thought about..."
One-upping: "That's it? Just last week guess what happened to me..."
Educating: "This could be a great opportunity to grow from this is you would just..."
Consoling: "It will be ok, don't worry. Things will work out.."
Story-telling: "My friend just went through this, you see what happened was..."
Shutting Down: "You really shouldn't be feeling this way, you're being unreasonable..."
Sympathizing: "You poor thing! That is just terrible how you're being mistreated!"
Interrogating: "Are you sure something didn't happen to him? When's the last time..."
Explaining: "Look, there was something that came up at work and it had to get done, that why..."
Correcting: "You don't really have your facts straight, see what actually happened was..."
In this episode we clarify why these responses create the opposite effect that they are intended to do and learn the simple yet powerful 4 Part Empathic Responses that is at the heart of Nonviolent Communication.
The Empathic Response can be used to diffuse arguments and fights, clear up confusion and disagreements and even be used to amplify and enhance positive experiences.
This formula can significantly improve your communication with family, friends and coworkers.
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