LATE NIGHT LARGE

Slap on some teak tan and bleach those pearly whites, it's time to see what you could have won! Up there with finest editions, this Late Night Large delves into the nostalgic and often hilariously cringey UK gameshow archives. Cheesy hosts; iconic catchphrases; dim contestants; fabulous prizes; they're all here! Sidestep to your left, Simon.

That most rapturous of seasons shines its light on the dark recesses of Large in this whimsical instalment of the amateur radio equivalent of the never-ending summer holiday! Expect talk of scandalous bikinis, offensive sunburn and washout holidays, while Mike explains why he likes his meat black and crunchy on the outside, but pink and gristly on the inside.

Once more into the breach, dear boy. The night the rest of the week pays penance to is the centrepiece here. Myth, intrigue and adventure...never has a night been so eulogised over. Like the invention of the teenager, Saturday night is a product of the modern West, and you'd best get yours before it's too late!

Enjoy a forearm smash as our two greasy groomers refuse to play nice online. This discussion centres on the origins of idea exchanges, from Ancient Rome to chatrooms which might be more at home on the Tor network. Democratic free market exchange of ideas, or bubbling cesspit of cretinous cyber-bullies? You decide.

Does any more need to be said? Cover your children's ears as Mike steers the car drunkenly towards the red light district for this show that was supposed to be about more than carnal indulgence.

Come and indulge your juvenile fantasies, as our two garbage pail kids discuss the items that are more valuable than gold to a pre-teen! In one of the most captivating editions of this always infantile show, marvel at the sense of wonder and lost innocence in their voices, as Mike and Aaron lament the lost toys, and the sacks of coal they received every Christmas.

Mike and Aaron play the elephants hiding behind the proverbial lamp post, as they attempt to go incognito in the show with more than meets the eye. More fun than walking into a bank wearing nothing but a ski mask.

Join us for take-off in one of the vintage episodes! Man's fondest spiritual quest is scavenged upon from on high, as our two flappers fly too close to the sun and fall to earth with a thump, whilst often breaking into spontaneous song, strangely enough. There are also myriad amusing diversions involving hummingbirds, castle walls and, of course, the clown of the sea. Plus Mike suggests Pingu gets eaten by everything...although he might have got confused.

Money lending is often the devil's work, and our two part-time advocates;; the Cynic and Sodomite, debate its moral and material consequences in this rapacious episode of the show without a soul. Leaving aside the fact that most money is simply digital numbers created with no intrinsic value, is it really morally just that a rich man can harvest an income from simply lending the less fortunate among us that which he needs to survive? Or is the world simply full of ignorant cretins with no fiscal discipline but plenty of impulse?

Better invest in some razor wire and patrolled watchtowers, as our two safety salamanders lay down your defences in the name of miseducation. If your idea of a safe night involves Mike enlightening you as to why his security career has never really got off the ground, and why he enjoys drinking his own urine, then this is the show for you!