Life Over Coffee

God is calling us to trust Him. There is a plan for this, and we are part of His plan. The tension, of course, is that He's the author of our stories, and we are not. Preferably, I want to be the writer of my story rather than trust the Sovereign story writer. During most of our daily affairs, we do trust God; it's only when things begin to fly sideways that the call to trust come under attack. When the heat in our lives intensifies, the temptation is to react in self-reliant ways because we're not getting the life we had hoped God would provide.

Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/i-am-mad-at-god-there-i-said-it/

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Shows Main Idea – There are some issues where it creates emotional tension if you speak honestly and transparently from two contrary perspectives. We tend to be on one side or the other. Fair and balanced becomes lost with some of our causes. Sometimes we don’t want to cede any aspect of our talking point out of fear: “If we admit their argument has valid elements, we lose ground on our perspective.” Other times folks will overcorrect because of past injustices, i.e., the reparation effect. Regardless of the reasons, we must work at being fair about our problems, and there are few things more vital for this kind of scrutiny than talking about abuse.

Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-418-five-common-mistakes-abuse-counselors-make/

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We have a herd mentality that drives us to conformity. The temptation to conform to the status quo is alluring. Rare individuals want to stand out and take a stand that is counter to the group’s norms, drawing attention to ourselves that might be criticized. We know a bully culture will cancel us if we step out of line. Sadly, there are many voices who have something to say and should be saying it but they dare not to because of timidity or perhaps they desire approval. Nevertheless, there is a call on all of us to find our unique voices and proclaim them regardless of the consequences. Of course, this leads us to the all-important question, how do you find our voice?

Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/finding-your-voice-to-be-who-god-wants-you-to-be/

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Christian legalism is the bane of religion. It’s the persistent nemesis lodged deep in all of our hearts. Though we often associate legalism with how a person comes to salvation, what I am addressing here is different—how legalism operates after a person has been born again. I’m speaking about how it subtly hijacks the process of sanctification. Most Christians I encounter do not struggle with a “works salvation.” Their real struggle is not how they were saved but how they live as saved people. It’s how they think about their lifestyle after God regenerates them.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/what-kind-of-unworthy-are-you-the-good-kind-or-the-bad-kind/

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Shows Main Idea – Supporting Member: “I believe I have something to say, but I’m unsure how to say it, and I don’t know the mechanics of crafting a blog article that compels someone to hang with me. What are the secrets to writing well so that people will want to read what I have to say? What are some of the things you have learned that have worked to build a loyal following? I’m sure some tips and tricks from an experienced pro would help a person rise above the millions of bloggers out there who are competing to build a following.”

Show Notes: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-417-secrets-that-teach-you-how-to-write-compelling-blog-content/

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Typically, when people think about modesty, their minds immediately go to what a person wears and arbitrary preferences rather than the heart’s motivations that influence their external choices. Perhaps when I mention “modesty,” your impulse was similar: “Great, he will tell us what to wear!” If so, you’re normal. But my goal here is different from mandating universal clothing stipulations. I am not going to suggest what you should wear. I want to focus on something more vital—our hearts, the genesis of all of our thoughts, attitudes, words, and behaviors, including how we adorn our bodies.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/exporting-modesty-to-the-next-generation/

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Social media is ubiquitous, and there are many redemptive applications of it. At Life Over Coffee, we talk about the redemptive uses of technology as we ponder about how to use this common grace mercy for God’s fame. But with all good things, there is always the insipid Adamic smell of death that lures people into the darker side of what should be a means of grace. Social media has many untoward temptations, one of those is the comparison trap that stirs a desire to compete with the culture’s view of appearance, attractiveness, acceptance, and approval. Many women succumb to this temptation, especially as they age. As one wife asked me, “How do I compete with cyber women as my body continues to waste away?”

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/how-can-i-compete-with-cyber-women/

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One hundred out of one hundred people struggle with the fear of man. Caring about what others think about us is part of our Adamic packaging. I have never counseled a person who did not struggle with this problem to some degree. Our secular community calls it co-dependency or peer pressure. It hardly matters as long as you can biblically define what is happening and apply God’s solutions. In this case study, I’m going to address fear in the context of marriage. Specifically, insecurity as the inhibitor that keeps a husband from leading his wife well.

Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/podcast/ep-416-a-crippling-reason-why-a-husband-does-not-lead-his-wife/

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Mable came to me, exclaiming, “I’m frustrated! I am always approaching my husband with my sin, asking for his forgiveness, but he seems never to see his need to ask me for forgiveness. Many times he won’t even bother to forgive me. What am I to do? How can I respond to him when he shows no interest in working with me through our problems?” Her complaint is not unusual in relationships, married or otherwise. Her situation is probably the norm because folks do not mature equally or at the same pace. Let me share with you what I told her, and, of course, you can apply these things to either gender, not just Biff.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/my-husband-never-asks-for-forgiveness-how-am-i-to-respond/

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There is an intrinsic nature to bitterness. The bitter person is like someone with a cup of poison. Each time they think about their problems, they take another sip. In most situations, the individual is not aware of what they are doing to themselves. It’s an unwitting form of self-sabotage. Perhaps they are aware, but the pain of their situation is so disappointing that they don’t care. From their painful perspective, it’s easier to grumble, complain, vent, and hurt. There is a better solution.

Read Here: https://rickthomas.net/bitterness-is-self-induced-poisoning-of-the-soul/

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