The widely-used adage ‘you can’t pick your family’ generally translates into making the best of what you have when you have no choice in the matter. People rarely have the option to choose who provides their mental and physical nourishment, especially children. How we handle relationships with relatives once we reach adulthood is up to us. But, if we have been subject to years of gaslighting or mental manipulation, it can be difficult to discern between what we believe is good for us and what we truly need to thrive. To dissect the cycle of both gaslighting and estrangement, Positive Psychology Podcast Host Lisa Cypers Kamen speaks with a therapist and a researcher about the complex relationships we engage in and disconnect from. Doctor of Psychology, Deborah Vinall offers an in-depth look at gaslighting, describes the key takeaways from her book, Gaslighting: A Step-by-Step Recovery

Guide to Heal from Emotional Abuse and Build Healthy Relationships, and shares the steps people can take to set self-

honoring boundaries when confronting a gaslighter. Kristina Sharp, Director of the Family Communication and Relationships Lab, at the University of Washington and Michigan State,

describes her role as a researcher who studies estrangement from first-hand accounts of those who have severed ties with families and the misguided perception of what a family is as

portrayed by American media.