friendship has never been my point of strength. many don’t know how to take my sarcasm and overall brutal personality, which does nothing to aid my friend making abilities. even in all of my faults, God has provided. i have been blessed with life-long friends who i have done nothing to deserve. for 16 years, these losers have stuck around, and i’m so glad they have. along the way, i have had the privilege of meeting new people who have hearts of gold that have become some of my closest confidants. without yall, i truly do not know where i would be. this one is for yall, our friendships, where we’ve been, and where we’re going. 

more labw ;) 

ig: @ littleasian.bigworld 

https://www.instagram.com/littleasian.bigworld/ 

tw: @ labwpodcast 

https://twitter.com/labwpodcast 

yt: @ Little Asian, Big World Podcast 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQePj1Z5VCMMRmYCRUJRvSQ

We all long to be salt and light, magic and color. We want to matter, to be more than ourselves. Fantasies of being known as beautiful, breathtaking, even awe inspiring ring through our heads. No- grandeur does not matter. We wish to exceed the norm, yet we don’t even fully know what we are reaching for. In our own way, we desire to be nothing more or less than everything genuinely lovely. To whom? That also varies from person to person. Some wish to be salt and light to just one, others desire for their magic and color to shine so brightly, the colors echo through the sound of their name. With these fantasies come blandness and darkness, dullness and pallor that we diverge with thoughts beyond actuality. What if we are overbearingly average? What if these illusions are just that, illusions? We dream so vividly, we hallucinate our dreams into our realities. What if someone else more worthy, more- simply more- is supposed to take hold of these dreams we cling to so tightly? What if we are destined for mediocrity? It calls our names, yet we hear nothing but empty praises and false encouragements pushing us towards expectations we are not meant to achieve.

The persuasion of fantasy is so irresistible, our sensibility is thrown so off kilter we cannot locate our authentic lives. There is not one singular day that we don’t escape into our minds creating worlds and people we wholeheartedly cling to, since escapism is what we are truly best at. The desire to change into our ideal and seemingly perfect version of life lulls us deeper into this false reality. We fall so deeply that we cannot decipher our creation from actuality. We live anywhere but the present. Gladly, we sail down, down, down into our hallucinations without a second thought. But, sometimes, isn’t that better than our dreary and drab world? Don’t we have to imagine becoming the salt and light, magic and color that fills this world with joy? Isn’t hope necessary for survival? But where is the line between fiction and reality? When do we have enough substance to create our mind’s picture of glamorized perfection into something physical? These questions are unanswerable until the timing is undeniably supernatural. Until that time comes, we can only give in to the unending cycle of wishful creation meant to distract our thoughts from the impending doom failure holds.

I am no exception from these adventures of the mind. I find myself to be most guilty of these foolish dreams that almost warrant the name aspirations. Selfish ambition is not to be rewarded so highly with such an exuberant name. I know deep down, I am nowhere near sufficient, but every day I reach for the impossible and untouchable with the unshakable certainty that I will never succeed at being salt and light, magic and color. Whether that’s foolish or futile or courageous or hopeful is for me and me alone to decide.

more labw ;)

ig: @ littleasian.bigworld

https://www.instagram.com/littleasian.bigworld/

tw: @ labwpodcast

https://twitter.com/labwpodcast

yt: @ Little Asian, Big World Podcast

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQePj1Z5VCMMRmYCRUJRvSQ

this term is destroying romance and chivalry. dating is nothing but a game of the most clever and nonchalant. “talking” makes things confusing when they don’t need to be. it creates a space for nothing but broken hearts and tears. romance is dying, but we’re confused as to why, yet we play these useless games that leave us in the same destructive cycle. we want the old fashioned love, yet we don’t even give it a chance to breathe. even though i’ve never been in a relationship, i’ve seen enough train wrecks and happily ever afters to know a thing or two.

show notes

more labw ;)

ig: @ littleasian.bigworld

https://www.instagram.com/littleasian.bigworld/

tw: @ labwpodcast

https://twitter.com/labwpodcast

even at the age of 11, life is impossible. there are countless obstacles that are difficult to overcome at any age. endless questions wander our minds. we can't help but be curious. life isn’t any clearer or easier to understand at a young age. miles wants to give you his perspective on middle school, family, image and more.

more labw ;)

ig: @ littleasian.bigworld

https://www.instagram.com/littleasian.bigworld/

tw: @ labwpodcast

https://twitter.com/labwpodcast