In this sixth part of our series on grieving we explore acceptance. We give kids and teens a chance to consider their experience with acceptance either in the past or present. We review some common thoughts tied to acceptance that divorced/separated and traumatized kids experience. Biblical stories where we see the themes of acceptance include Job, Joseph and Jesus Himself. We foreshadow the next phase of grief which is thriving and forgiveness. The activity for this week is considering how a piece of clay might feel in various stages as "the potter" shapes it; a very powerful metaphor for the grieving process.

For the teens, several journal prompts are discussed as they gain skill in journalling and a worksheet for the children can be found on the Facebook site:

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In this forth part of our series on grieving we explore sadness. We give kids and teens a chance to consider their experience with sadness either in the past or present understanding that often underneath anger is a deep sadness. We review some common thoughts tied to sadness that divorced and separated kids experience. We stress that both God and Jesus model sadness so it is ok. We again use Psalm 22 as the scriptural anchor for the grieving process. Finally as the activity we introduce the concept of breath prayer for use in times of strong emotion.

In this third part of our series on grieving we explore anger. We give kids and teens a chance to consider their experience with anger either in the past or present. We review some common thoughts tied to anger common to divorced and separated kids. We stress that both God and Jesus model anger so it is ok. Its what we do with our anger where we must be careful. Finally we see how Jesus' sacrifice relates to resolving anger and helps us ultimately forgive God, others, and ourselves.

In this podcast we spend time learning about the first stage of grief: shock and/or denial. We give kids and teens a chance to understand shock and denial and then allow them space to invite those thoughts and feelings to come forward. We review common thoughts kids have with grief, and finally how Jesus models and leads us through this stage in Psalm 22. We can feel far from God but are reminded that He is always with us. Finally we explore that grief, like many themes in the Bible, has an earthly and Godly component as well.

In this first part of our grief series we look at the total process of grief. Children SHOULD grieve after a divorce/separation or trauma, but often are caught up in the moment and require space and permission to grieve and express the full range of emotions. They often must be led through grief. Teens may need to "go back in time" and allow the inner kid to grieve. While each individual person grieves in a unique way like fingerprints or snowflakes, there are stages: Shock/Denial, Anger, Sadness, Bargaining, Acceptance, and Forgiveness/Thriving. We introduce the basic components of grief to be explored in later small group videos and note if we do not grieve we risk exploding like a volcano. The other concept to keep in mind left unsaid in the podcast itself is that when Christ said “I am the Good Shepherd” He was giving us a great way to conceptualize grief. If you think you may have unprocessed grief, please reach out to [email protected] for a free PDF copy of our grief workbook for adults. Or watch this video: https://youtu.be/w0mz1orAsR0

What is under appreciated in today’s western church is the fact that Jesus’ original intent was to form a multi-ethnic church for everyone. This means multi-cultural. This episode was made shortly after the tragic events of George Floyd and the race riots in 2020. We use the age old fable of the mouse and lion to show people how we can react in the face of anger and aggression. We also look at how different people see the world, but that we are all ultimately united in the traumas this world inflicts on us. Even Jesus was not immune to these traumas as He hung from the cross. Therefore we build our church with brothers and sisters united around the idea that Jesus is a model for us showing how to be oppressed but yet forgive and love without compromise or defeat

In this second part of our series on helping kids see that a separation was not their fault. In Small Group Episode 2 we saw that even if we think we have done “bad” things, Jesus still loves us and is our Good Shepherd. We focus in this episode on explaining how relationships can end so children can see at a basic level that it isn’t their fault at all. This illogical conclusion they make can become deeply embedded in the inner workings of their heart. In the podcast we give parents more to think about on this topic.

Little Pieces Club’s origin is in small groups for divorced children and teens. This episode is the first of a two-part series that helps them re-process the divorce. Children and teens often process traumatic events with their limited perspective. In this case their absolute trust in their parents often causes children to frame a bad event as “their fault.” This begins a legacy where they doubt their social capability. This false interpretation becomes very hard for them to process and speak about. Jesus would say it impacts their heart rather than mind. We approach this scripturally reminding them, even if they feel this way Jesus still loves them. In Part 2 we tackle head on that it is NOT their fault. Keep in mind that this feeling has a purpose in that although wrong, it keeps them from feeling their primary source of security failed. Wise and self aware parents can address this with apology and age appropriate explanation of the divorce. Further, they must focus the child’s physical and emotional safety after the divorce.

To start out our weekly small group sessions we spend time on the question of why bad things happen. Divorce, to a child, can often feel like a bad thing. And one of their first questions might be “Why is God doing this to us?” As the first episode, we also review the at home format so parents can understand and facilitate a session at home.