Look Ma No Hands

Forget everything you think you know about sex and dive into this episode about sex postpartum, the science behind our sex drive and lack thereof, why "scheduling sex" might not be as weird as you think it is, and what all couples should consider when approaching a healthy relationship in and out of the bedroom.

What are the core traits that make someone successful? I'll give you a hint: it's not about being perfect at everything. It's not about being all things to all people, all the time.

"We're built with a set of gifts," explains Denise Hamilton. "You are not designed to impact the world through your weaknesses. You're designed to impact the world through your strengths."

Forget editing and filtering your favorite snaps and think about how you filter what you see on social media. Why? Because our self-worth, ability to "start" the projects we've been dreaming of and embrace who we are as parents and people depends on it. Most of us can only do a few things really well, so why are we suddenly so hung up on doing everything perfectly? The energy we're putting in to firing on all cylinders in every area of life is draining us and causing burnout in epic proportions. Not only that, but we're expecting the same of our spouses and others around us in a way that's detrimental to our happiness and mental health. But alas, there is oh-so-much hope. Hear it, listen to it and feel it in this latest episode of LMNH with the one and only Denise Hamilton, founder of Watch Her Work (www.watcherwork.com.)

Denise has been featured on NPR, Forbes, FOX, Huffington Post, CBS, NBC and most recently as the host of “Project Comeback” on Lifetime. She has been featured in Huffington Post, Ebony Magazine, Xconomy, Black Enterprise, and the Houston Business Journal.  She was named one of the 41 Most Fascinating People in Houston by the Houston Chronicle and Woman Who Means Business by the Houston Business Journal. She was named one the 41 Most Fascinating People in Houston by the Houston Chronicle and one of Houston’s Most Influential Women by Houston Woman Magazine.

Denise believes that you shouldn’t have to have powerful friends to have powerful information. She is committed to making sure that the information needed for women to build a business, climb the corporate ladder, and get on boards is available to every woman and the men that support them.

"Denise has been one of the best reviewed speakers of all time. We have female employees all over the world. She was able to engage them at all levels. She is a master at what she does." - Merlex Harris, IBM

Mary Beth Arcidiacono, LMSW is a mother, social worker, consultant, researcher, and advocate. On August 8, 1998 she was involved in an accident with her four children on her family’s drive home from a vacation in Colorado. Her oldest son, Johnny, was killed, and his younger brother, Christopher, sustained a traumatic brain injury.

Mary Beth started on a new path at the unexpected moment of her loss and along the way has struggled, explored, questioned, and discovered things that need to be shared with others. She has become an expert on the realities and consequences of traumatic loss and grief – and offers rare and illuminating practical suggestions for the families and friends of those who have lost a loved one.

Keri Henry started Wine & "Bites" with Keri after stumbling upon some pretty magical grape juice and a whole bunch of wisdom, which she's sharing on this latest episode of "Look Ma' No Hands."

Dr. Megan Pallister is a Houston-based OBGYN for the modern era; she does skype calls with her patients for their two-week postpartum appointment so they don't have to trek all the way to her office (can I get a Hallelujah), her Instagram is a transparent, dedicated platform that makes you feel like you have an on-call OB/BFF, and her perspective on delivering babies changed in a major way when she finally had her own baby several years ago. If you've struggled with miscarriage, breastfeeding, baby blues and any of the other bumps in the road associated with life postpartum, you'll want to listen to what Dr. Pallister has to say about her own experiences and how she uses her practice to make this world a brighter, better place for pregnant and postpartum mamas.

Talking to Elizabeth Miller of Elizabeth Miller Therapy was like walking into a warm hug. She's a psychotherapist and marriage and family counselor who works with women in all stages of motherhood and holds space for their stories, grief, love and hope. 

Facebook groups assembled to "support" moms in all stages of motherhood might appear to be communities of support, but underneath the surface, they can be a hotbed for "mom shaming", intense criticism and online bullying. Amanda Ducach decided to do something when she started "Social Mama App", a "match.com for moms" that helps you find your mom soulmates in a supportive online forum. Listen to hear from both Amanda and Amanda Vlastas of West University Moms on how the app is changing the game when it comes to friendship postpartum. 

"Don't look back: you're not going that way." - Wayne Dyer.  Basya Benshushan helps me piece together something I haven't understood until now: I'm not going back to who I was before, not even the person I was after I gave birth to my first daughter, Selma. There is no roadmap in my past for my future. With each child I bear, I grow more into who I am meant to be, and sometimes, I'm surprised by who she is. It's scary being in foreign territory with yourself. And yet, Basya's bravery has inspired my own and I hope you'll listen to this mother of four and CEO of digital marketing agency Pink Cilantro on what it means to evolve openheartedly and stay spiritually grounded in motherhood and beyond.

The best of "Look Ma' No Hands" so far and the upcoming interviews I can't wait to share with you. Plus: my friend who's doing a "no-shop November" and why I'm inspired and the bedroom after babies - why nobody talks about it and every mama wants to talk about it.

Self-care is so much more than just getting a mani/pedi or doing an at-home facial. Self-care is about choices, prioritizing your needs and, as Megan of Willow Crowns puts it, making every decision with the goal of "preserving your emotional bandwidth." We only have so much energy to give to ourselves, our children, and our passions, so it makes sense that being meticulous about how we expend that energy, who we spend time with, and how we choose not to spend our time, makes all the difference in how we feel each day and what our lives look like. 

I hope you’ll tune in to this latest podcast episode where Megan and I discuss the holy grail of taking care of ourselves while caring care of others, how she started her hair accessories business with two kids in tow, and what she knows about success in motherhood, business and life. If being a mom has taught me anything, it’s that you can fit what matters into one day with room to spare, so long as you prioritize what matters.