Love and Libido

Sex shouldn’t hurt unless you want it to, but that’s not the case for a lot of people. The fact is, 1 in 4 individuals, yeah 25% of people, experience some kind of pain that affects the quality of their sex. As we’ll discuss on today’s show, pain can be caused by several factors, which is why I’ve called in sexual pain expert and host of the Sluts and Scholars Podcast, Nicoletta Heidegger.

Are you a mother or partner of a mother who feels like your relationship has gone downhill since kids entered the scene? You love your partner and you love your kids, but you feel like you’ve lost yourself somewhere along the way. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, our sexuality is inextricably linked to our individuality. Without a strong sense of self, your relationship and sex life are going to suffer. So, how can we love our kids without losing ourselves and still find time for love and romance in the mix? That’s the topic of today’s episode.

Dr. Morgan Cutlip, who has a Ph.D. in psychology and is a highly sought-after relationship expert, knows what it feels like to lose yourself in motherhood and she’s determined to help mothers navigate it better. Throughout her career, she has helped hundreds of thousands of people worldwide learn how to form and maintain healthy relationships. Dr. Morgan has been a featured relationship expert with Good Morning America, Teen Vogue, New York Times, Women’s Health Magazine, MOPS International, Loveology, and Flow, which is the number one app in Health and Fitness. Her book, Love Your Kids Without Losing Yourself, is available now.

Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.

If you like what you hear, don’t forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Alexandra Stockwell, an intimate marriage expert specializing in showing couples how to build beautiful, long-lasting passionate relationships. She is the bestselling author of “Uncompromising Intimacy” and host of The Institute of Marriage Podcast.

A wife of 26 years and mother of 4, Alexandra believes the key to passion and fulfillment, intimacy and success isn’t compromise –it’s being unwilling to compromise -because when both people feel free to be themselves and know how to love and be loved for exactly who they are, the relationship is juicy, nourishing, and deeply satisfying.

Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.

If you like what you hear, don’t forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

Do you or your partner struggle to stay focused, present, and connected to your body during sex? Do you find yourself easily distracted? Well, you’re not alone. This is one of the most common complaints I get from my clients. Today, I’m joined by therapist Tara Galeano who is going to chat with us about ways to stay more embodied during sex so that you can amplify your pleasure.

Author Tara Galeano is a certified sex therapist and sexual empowerment coach who has worked with women and couples for over two decades to get their sexy back. She knows that there is pleasure in the body and everyone can access it. In her book ‘Rediscovering My Body’, Tara teaches us how to show up for our desires by being more fully embodied.

Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.

If you like what you hear, don’t forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

Is it true that women are from Venus and men are from Mars? Are men and women more alike or more different? Why do we seem to have totally different ways of communicating with one another, and how can we work together to build happier and healthier relationships?

Dr. Ricky Arenson is a dual-trained Endocrinologist and Geriatrician who lives in Perth, Western Australia, with his wife of twenty years and their four children.

As the head of a major hospital, working with patients who have reached 100 years of age, Ricky asked them what the secret to their longevity was… surprisingly it wasn’t eating acai berries and doing yoga… it was having long-term positive relationships.

His outrageously funny yet serious book ‘Women Are Superior to Men’ explores why so many couples have the same arguments about how often to have sex, how men don’t notice or pick up the mess they leave lying around, and how men communicate in grunts or jokes when their wives are looking for a serious conversation. It’s an easy guide to creating and maintaining a magical relationship filled with love, joy, and better (and more frequent) sex.

Ricky has helped over 30,000 patients, holds numerous medical awards, and was awarded a lifetime Outstanding Service Award by Royal Perth Hospital. He has also founded several businesses, owns a private medical practice, and is a stand-up comedian.

Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.

If you like what you hear, don’t forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

Have you recently ended a relationship and feel lost on how to begin anew? Have you ever wondered why you seem to be attracting people who frankly, aren’t compatible or healthy for you? Does “the one” really exist, and if so, how the heck are we supposed to find them?

My guest, Allison Jayne Ewing is a licensed psychotherapist and EFT practitioner.

Surprised to find herself divorced at midlife, Allison realized none of the fairytales she read growing up said what happened when you did NOT live happily ever after.

Dazed and confused by her sudden single status, she embarked on the dreaded task of having to date again.

Allison noticed she wasn’t alone. Many of her single friends were struggling with dating, and meeting shitty guys while desperately searching for ‘the one’.

But, there was a turning point for her, which we are going to chat about today.

As a psychotherapist and an EFT practitioner for 25 years, Allison decided to focus on helping other women find healthy available single men who will love and adore them. She has worked with hundreds of women to clear their unconscious blocks and manifest the life of their dreams.

Her book “Find Love Again“, is a guide to igniting your inner goddess and finding the man of your dreams.

Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

Have you ever wondered how often most people have sex per month? What about how to start a threesome? Well, we are going to tackle that and more in today’s Q&A episode. You guys submit such great questions, and I want to thank you so much for being so vulnerable. It’s not always easy to put this stuff out there. We’ve got a nice variety today. In addition to the “how often should I be having sex question” and “how to start a threesome question,” I’m also going to answer one new father’s question about how to support his wife in rediscovering her libido since having a baby 6 months ago.

16:41 Question 2 – What is a healthy number of times to have sex per month?
26:06 Question 3 – What is the best way to start a threesome?

If you like what you hear, don't forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don't forget to check out my online workshop, The Five Sex Languages: Secrets to Long-Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

People are so focused on increasing their desire for sex that they forget one simple fact… you’re only going to desire sex if you’re having good sex!

So what can we do to improve sexual satisfaction? Today I’m joined by a sexpert who conducted a huge research study that examines just that. We are going to chat about what she discovered to be the most important predictors of sexual satisfaction. Get your pen and paper ready, because you’re going to want to take notes!

Dr. Tara is a sex and relationship expert, award-winning researcher, and professor of sexual communication. She has her Ph.D. in human communication and received her tenure at the age of 33, now working as a professor of relational and sexual communication at California State University Fullerton.

Additionally, she is a sexual communication and relationship coach at LuvBites and host of the Luvbites by Dr. Tara podcast, which focuses on sexual wellness and sexploration.

Her expertise has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and Insider, among others. Her 2019 TEDx Talk entitled Become Sexually Powerful highlights her 5,000-participant study examining predictors of sexual satisfaction, and her journey from an anxious immigrant from Thailand to a confident sexpert. I am so thrilled to have her on the show today!

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option for us to disguise your voice with our fancy editing software, so no worries there if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released. If you like what you’re hearing, don’t forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, The Five Sex Languages: Secrets to Long-Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off the full price of the workshops.

I am happy to report that Q&A episodes are back! It’s been a while since I’ve recorded one, but you guys have been sending in such great questions I just had to get some of them answered and we’ve got some good ones today. I am going to help a guy who is feeling stuck about how to help his wife enjoy sex more, then I have two more questions about desire but on opposite ends. One person worries they don’t desire sex enough while the other worries he desires sex too much. So, without further ado, let’s dive in!

If you like what you’re hearing, don’t forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don’t forget to check out my online workshop, The Five Sex Languages: Secrets to Long-Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.

 Are you someone whose past sexual trauma is preventing you from enjoying sex at your full capacity? Do you even know what your full capacity is or have you like so many people accepted mediocre sex as your norm? Today, we're going to talk about how reclaiming, reconnecting, and rediscovering vital parts of yourself can propel you out of trauma and into sexual pleasure.

Kim Coffin is a certified Trauma Informed, Somatic (body-based) Empowerment & Sexuality Coach, Bestselling Author & Teacher, a graduate of Layla Martin’s Institute of Integrated Tantric Sexuality, and founder of Get Your Sexy Back.

She specializes in Sexuality, Tantric Sex and Relationship Transformation giving you the tools to unleash your sexual confidence and unlock profound new levels of self-love, pleasure, empowerment, and intimacy with yourself – and in your relationships!

By creating deep trust and safety in your body and mind, Kim will show you how to RECONNECT to your body, ACTIVATE your turn-on, HEAL heartbreak & shame, and RECLAIM your true SEXY self so that you can fully step into your UNAPOLOGETIC POWER! 

A gift for the love & libido listeners: 

Free – 8 Tools to Activate Your Turn-On + Practice + Free Month to my Sacred Pleasure Membership – https://view.flodesk.com/pages/63d4adadecc6781900626c2d

You can get more from Kim here:

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=569755109

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/get_your_sexy_back_coach/

Get Your Sexy Back Podcast – https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/get-your-sexy-back/id1489475566

Thank you to BetterHelp, an online therapy platform that has already helped millions, for sponsoring the show. Get 10% off your first month of therapy by visiting www.betterhelp.com/dremily or by using code DREMILY at check out.

If you like what you hear, don't forget to leave me a five-star review. Your positive feedback helps me grow so that we can continue having these engaging, informative, and fun conversations. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow & subscribe so that you’ll be notified when a new episode is released.

If you have a question or a story you would like to share, you can submit it at www.loveandlibido.com. You can either email in your story or you can record your submission, whatever is easier for you. We always give you the option to have your voice professionally disguised with our fancy editing software, so no worries if you would like to remain anonymous. Or if you’re loud and proud, and you want to tell us who are as you share your question, that is fine too. We are also collecting story submissions as well. You can follow me across all the social media channels @dremilyjamea. That’s usually the best place to see what information we are looking for as it relates to topics we are discussing on the show.

And don't forget to check out my online workshop, Anatomy of Desire: 5 Secrets to Lasting Intimacy. Visit www.emilyjamea.com/workshop for your free sample. Subscribers can use code HALFOFF for 50% off.