Welcome to my latest series, LIES GOOD MOMS BELIEVE! 

In today’s episode I am joined with ChristianParenting.org's Cynthia Yanof, the author and host of Pardon the Mess podcast. Together we are tackling the lie: I'm not enough. 

This lie hits harder than others just because of how pervasive it is in the lives of women. From the moment we're teenagers, to young adults, and then mothers, we're constantly battling that lie. Cynthia and I explore the right and wrong ways of responding to this lie, and how to stand firm in God's truth of who we are: enough. 

You can learn more about Cynthia on the Christian Parenting website. 

And you can connect with her through  Instagram, and Twitter! You can also check out the Pardon the Mess podcast Facebook page. 

For this week's downloadable prayer, click here! 

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

The enemy tailor makes the lies he speaks to us

 

If we realize his motives, we can get angry in a healthy way and stand against his lies

 

There’s no way to hit us harder than with our kids

 

Two ways we respond to his lies:

1. Paralysis - we step out
2. Step in too much - we chase after things that aren’t necessarily God’s plan for our kids

 

Find perfect peace in God’s sovereignty over your parenting 

 

Our best parenting comes when we are chasing after the Lord

 

“Don’t be afraid of failing. Be afraid of succeeding at the wrong things.” - Francis Chan 

 

Why do we agree with the enemy’s lies?

 

1. We feel overlooked

1 John 2:20

I’m not overlooked - I’m anointed

 

1. We feel disqualified

Know how to repent and know your identity

 

We don’t have to have this idea that we should have already achieved this perfection as a mom, as soon as we become a mom.

 

Let’s not compare, let’s model after.

 

If you’re going to compare, always compare everything you are facing with the truth of scripture.

 

Go back to God’s word and ask: What is the truth?

 

Guard who you allow to speak into your parenting

 

Everyone has an opinion - that’s overwhelming and that starts a comparison game.

 

Don’t reject teachable moments because you are threatened by another’s perceived perfection.

 

Being willing to be teachable is being willing to be vulnerable.

 

As Moms, we are doing a disservice to one another if we are following that model that things have to look a certain way.

 

Esther 4:14 - “Perhaps this is the moment for which you have been created.”

 

I can trust that the God of the universe who picked me for now, knew what He was doing.

 

What we are called to do is be faithful.

 

The Great Commission starts at home.

 

If our impact wasn’t significant, the enemy wouldn’t go after it.

 

Only God can heal this lie. 

 

When you are stuck believing this lie:

 

1. Go to God’s Word
2. Remember: God’s hand is in the hard places

 

Wherever you are feeling “not good enough” - remember, He is raising up good in those places

 

Sit in God’s Word and sit in the truth of your anointing

Welcome to my new series, LIES GOOD MOMS BELIEVE! 

During this summer season, I am going to be joined by some amazing guests, and together we are going to dedicate each episode to calling out a common lie the enemy speaks to the hearts of Moms.

We’re going to measure that lie against the truth of scripture, offer you some practical advice and Biblical encouragement through discussion and then end our time with a simple but powerful prayer to equip you to take these lies head on whenever they try and sneak their way into your mind.

In today’s episode, we are going to tackle the lie: someone else could do it better than me. 

And here to help me in this discussion is Becky Keife.

Becky Keife is the author of three books and the mother to three boys, her books are:  The Simple Difference, Courageous Kindness, and No Better Mom for the Job. She is also the Community Manager for the DaySpring community (in)courage. Becky says “Championing women to live courageously, empowered by the strength Jesus gives, makes me come alive.” 

You can learn more about Becky through her website!  

You can connect with her through Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. 

For the downloadable prayers, click here! 

 

Welcome to my new series, LIES GOOD MOMS BELIEVE! 

Over the next 11 weeks I am going to be joined by some amazing guests, and together we are going to dedicate each episode to calling out a common lie the enemy speaks to the hearts of Moms.

We’re going to measure that lie against the truth of scripture, offer you some practical advice and Biblical encouragement through discussion and then end our time with a simple but powerful prayer to equip you to take these lies head on whenever they try and sneak their way into your mind.

In today’s first episode of this new mini-series, we are going to tackle the lie: I’m “just” a mom

And here to help me in this discussion is Cheri Fletcher.

Cheri is a writer, speaker, singer and the host of Your Spiritual Game Plan podcast. 

She loves to help women develop a spiritual game plan so that they can live out the purpose God created for them.  She wants to share the message of just how intentionally you were made to be a part of God’s plan.  

Through her writings, speaking and podcast guest it is her desire to equip you with an understanding of the enemy’s plot against that very plan.

You can learn more about Cheri through her website!

And you can connect with her through Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. 

For the downloadable prayers, click here! 

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

1. The enemy hates us
2. He is seeking to trip us up and derail us from our mission
3. He lies to us constantly in order to achieve that

 

I didn’t feel relevant because I was doing nothing to contribute

 

When we end up dropping the ball, the enemy is there to remind you “you are nothing more than…”

 

The enemy was able to entice her (Eve) with wanting to be more than she already was and believing she wasn’t who God wanted her to be after all.

Once he could get that thought into her mind, she took care of the rest on her own. 

 

He planted the thoughts into my heart and into my head and I watered them

 

God has a PLAN for you and the enemy has a PLOT against you.

 

The enemy wasn’t created in God’s image and he can’t create.

We are made in God’s image and we can create.

 

The enemy has so much to lose when you shine.

 

Just = nothing more than VS Just = exactly what I need

 

Ephesians 2:10 - “For we are God’s masterpiece, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared ahead of time for us to do.” (Emphasis mine)

 

Sandy Patty song: Masterpiece

 

When God created YOU, He did not say, now go figure out why.

 

Choosing to agree with Truth, rather than lies - help us to agree we are a masterpiece intentionally created to serve a purpose for His glory

 

John 10:10 - the enemy’s only purpose

 

What the enemy says is true, but it’s not THE TRUTH. (audio graphic)

 

Daily spiritual game plan is to remember a scripture I can give back to the enemy when he attacks. Or a worship song.

 

We’re in a battle whether we choose to acknowledge it or not.

We’re in a battle whether we choose to be a part of it or not.

 

The only way I can find victory is to claim it every day.

 

Fight the battle but also keep the mission in mind

 

You are such an intentionally created daughter of God.

Have you every wondered how God feels about our 'big feelings' or if the Bible has anything to say about them?

 

Life can cause very human reactions from us especially when we are tired, stressed or have been deeply hurt.

 

The book of Psalms is FULL of the author's 'big feelings' and downright rants to God.

 

Join me this week for a discussion with the author of the new release, Restore My Soul, Laura Smith.

 

Laura is no stranger to 'big feelings' and shares her story of seeking out her self worth in all the wrong places and how God met her in the Psalms and changed her forever.

 

In this week's episode on the podcast, Laura and I discuss:

 

~The struggle of pretending to be someone you are not for the purpose of seeking out love

~How we can manage our own 'big feelings' while teaching our kids to do the same

~How to release worry and give God the glory

~How the Psalms remind us of our value to God

~And more!

The world tries to tell us our value based on things like the clothes we wear, a number on a scale, how many likes we have on Facebook, and a slew of other anxiety-indusing reasons... but Scripture tells us our value comes from God and we are beautifully made by Him! 

On this week's episode, special guest Laura Smith, author of the upcoming book "Restore My Soul - The Power and Promise of 30 Psalms", shares some of her journey with Somer and how God used the Psalms repeatedly to remind Laura of His love and her value. Today, Laura hopes to share this with others, just as the psalmists share with us their big feelings and God's continual presence. 

You can pre-order her new book now! 

You can also connect with Laura Smith on her:

-Facebook

-Twitter

-Instagram

Visit her website for more information, read her blog, and check out her other books! 

Don't forget to connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram

Sign up to join Somer's Ahavah Community for FREE HERE!

These days, it’s harder than ever to instill in our daughters the godly confidence they so desperately need. 

And without that confidence, our girls are left to navigate — on their own — the pressures and values of the world around them. 

This week on the show, Somer talks with licensed marriage and family therapist, life coach, author, speaker, podcast host and mom of 2, Terra Mattson.

Somer and Terra discuss:

• Some of the greatest challenges mothers and daughters face today
• Giving moms confidence to tackle tough topics with their daughters
• The importance of healthy communication between mothers and daughters
• All about Terra's new course, Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters
• And more!

Connect with Terra, and check out her podcasts and register for Helping Moms Raising Confident Daughters today! 

Connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram

Sign up to join Somer's Ahavah Community for FREE HERE!

The enemy seeks to steal, kill and destroy and that includes relationships between Christian women.

In today’s episode I am thrilled to welcome my good friend, author, speaker and host of the Love Offering podcast, Rachael Adams to discuss the Unexpected Weapon the Enemy Uses Against Women…assumptions.

Rachael and I dive into:

• How the enemy can get in our head and uses assumptions to hinder relationships
• How to respond to our assumptions
• Practical steps to overcome assumptions
• How to encourage our children as they experience assumptions

This is one of my absolute FAVORITE conversations on the Love Where You Are podcast and I can’t wait for you to tune in!

 

Connect with Rachael at rachaelkadams.com and on Instagram

Connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram and be sure to join the Ahavah Community for weekly updates and bonus resources!

Register for Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters Course by going to cpguides.org

Resources mentioned in today’s episode:

 

https://somercolbert.com/2021/03/15/assumptions-taking-our-imaginations-captive/

 

Katie McCown episode on the Love Offering podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/she-smiles-without-fear-with-katy-mccown/id1448057435?i=1000523014758

 

You heard Rachel reference a previous conversation several times in today’s episode. Click the link to listen to my conversation with Angie Gibbons: How Anxiety Can Hinder Us From Loving Well

 

Check out Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen

Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer

Break Bread Together by Jess Herberger

The Art of Friendship by Kim Weir

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

Assumptions = thinking something is fact when you have no proof

 

We put people in categories and labels

 

I feel like assumptions are almost a judgment of someone

 

“Before we know it, even without proof, what we assume becomes our truth. Our misguided feelings lead to misguided thoughts, which cause misguided responses. The result: ruined relationships.” - Wendy Pope

 

Insecurity has held me back for way too long

 

Insecurity is a focus on self

 

What if the other person is struggling with assumptions too?

 

Is what I am thinking: true, noble, right, pure, praiseworthy?

 

Instead of assuming, ask questions and clarify

 

What does God’s Word say? Because that is what is true!

 

I think the enemy uses the comparison trap to build walls in our minds, discouraging and dividing our efforts.

 

The enemy’s goal is to divide us because he knows how fierce a gathering of strong, faithful Christian women can be against his efforts and against his evil plot. 

 

Go to the Lord first before you even entertain your thoughts

 

“Few things are as fierce as a woman empowered by Christ.” - Becky Beresford

 

SFD = sloppy first draft

 

We’re not fighting against other women, we’re fighting against an enemy who wants to destroy and divide us

 

Put on the armor of God - Ephesians 6

 

We can’t just run away, we have to stand firm

 

Assumptions are half truths

 

We get a little bit of information from what we’re seeing

 

We want to control and we don’t want to be hurt - so we guard ourselves

 

Practical ways to respond to assumptions:

• Be mindful
• Transform your assumption into a question
• Give yourself and others the benefit of the doubt
• Say “We’ll see” and act in faith

 

To automatically discount someone because they are different is a mistake

 

We are commanded to love as Christ loves whether people treat us well or not

As busy moms, there is always something to do and somewhere to be it seems.

Some busyness is unavoidable based on the season of life you are in, but how busy is too busy?

And how does that affect our ability to really live?

This week I am bringing back one of my favorite conversations with my friend, Daisy Fuentes Dronen where we address how to break free from the crazy cycle of busyness.

Seriously, you are going to LOVE Daisy and the wisdom she has to share on this topic as she and I discuss:

• The messages the world sends us about busyness
• How busyness can affect our relationships
• Tools the enemy uses against us as women
• How God feels about busyness
• And practical ways to slow down and prioritize how to spend our time

One of my favorite things Daisy shares in this episode is breath prayers and how to build a habit of slowing your mind and heart to dwell on God.

Connect with Daisy on Instagram and check our her latest breath prayers HERE!

Connect with Somer on Instagram and sign up to receive weekly updates in the Ahavah Community here! 

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

As women we are created to be partners. To join others in service for example our spouses Eve was created to be a helpmate for Adam. As christian women we are called to very tangible service organizing creating coordinating things, even teaching. We even are taught and instructed to serve as Christ served, but we are not always taught how Christ served. We are already wired to be nurturers so we feel a great sense of purpose and pride when we see our work being accomplished. And we can quickly go through life believing that our worth is found in accomplishing. And we allow ourselves to be defined by our doing and accomplishing. We also don’t want to let anyone down and we believe we will have greater favor in doing. We have even believed that we could let God down. 

Busyness can get into every crevice and before we know it we are completely missing our lives. -daisy

 

What messages does the world around us send to us about busyness?

• Hustle 
• Independent woman achieve more
• You can do anything you set your mind to
• You're just a stay at home mom
• You can have it all 
• You are successful when you accomplish
• Multi tasking is the new super power 

What tools does the enemy use to cause our busyness to distract us from seeing the needs of others? 

Corrie ten boom says “ if the devil can’t make you sin he will make you busy” 

He uses Lies to 

• Cause division
• • You begin to think people are not carrying their own weight
  • They are never available
• Self preoccupation
• • I am the only one that always…
  • Nobody cares about me 
• Fear
• • Afraid if i am not performing or accomplishing i am not favored
  • Afraid of missing out
• Frenzy
• • In the frenzy of busyness we can’t stop enough to confess, to meditates, to be still to abide, to let God be God

How can we begin to take steps to recognize our own busyness?

• First decide to find out- one of my favorite and most terrifying prayers comes from psalm 139 'Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!'Psalm 139:23-22
• • The Lord will accompany you in this process as well invite him in, he is ready and willing 
• Talk to your husband or close friend and ask them 
• Pay attention to comments such as i don’t know how you do it all
• Make a list of all the things you are involved in or do just because you have always done them. Show them to God and I love how Emily p.freeman talks about which are life giving and which are life draining. 

 

 

The twists and turns of life are hard but they are also an opportunity to lean in and learn more about the character and goodness of God. 

In this episode, author and co-founder of Girl Defined Ministries, Kristen Clark shares her story of infertility, miscarriage and God's perfect plan for her family through adoption. 

Kristen and I discussed:

• How to prepare for the twists and turns when you are in a blissful season
• Giving permission to grieve and rejoice at the same time
• How disappointment can lead to God's perfect plan for you
• Her adoption story
• Her biggest lesson through the twists and turns of life

Resources mentioned:

Attributes of God FREE download at girldefined.com/god

Connect with Kristen on Facebook, Instagram and at girldefined.com

Connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram

Sign up to receive weekly emails and resources from Somer HERE!

 

“But we know there is peace there is comfort there is hope because we can look in his presence and say ‘God one day I will be with you forever, one day every tear will be wiped away, one day I will be in your presence.’” 

Author and Co-founder of Girl Defined Ministries, Bethany Beal knows about the twists and turns life can bring.

That is why she has a passion to encourage Christian women to look to God when things happen that they just don't understand.

In this episode Bethany shares her story of waiting for marriage longer than she had planned followed by her heartbreaking experiences with miscarriage.

Through it all, Bethany has a message of hope and encouragement for you today...

We discussed:

• typical responses when we experience unexpected twists and turns
• how to struggle well when the unexpected happens
• head knowledge vs. heart belief in the goodness of God
• shifting your expectations and focusing on relationship with God
• how to love where you are in unexpected seasons of life

Bethany's passion for women and love for God is infectious and I can't wait for you to hear her story and learn from her experience!

Connect with Bethany on Instagram and at girldefined.com

Get your copy of Not Part of the Story: Trusting God with the Twists and Turns of Your Story and check out their adorable merch HERE

Connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram

Sign up to receive weekly emails and resources from Somer HERE!

 

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

Don’t let your circumstances keep you from God

 

The World won’t tell us to go to Christ, we in our flesh won’t naturally go to Christ; it’s a relationship, it takes time and growing into. 

 

“God, you are my strength” 

Run the race that God has set before you, YOUR race, not someone else’s. 

 

Grieving with people, whatever they’re going through, their journey is different than yours, we can’t put labels and values on individual’s life experiences and suffering. 

 

“There are so many things we could do to bash other women and diminish the things that they’re going through instead of saying ‘no, we are called to love one another, support one another, serve one another.’ So I think for each of us we need to have that mindset saying, ‘God this is the race you’ve set before me.’” 

 

So important we don’t diminish or abandon people in suffering.   

 

God wants us to be image bearers and reflect His character. 

 

Having one or two godly women around you to reach out for support, to maintain focus on the Word of God and maintaining that relationship with God, being held accountable and look up to as examples and rolemodels. 

 

“God, I desire to know you.” 

 

Proverbs 3:5-6  

 

Connect with Bethany on Instagram and at Girl Defined: https://girldefined.com

Connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram

 

Sign up to receive weekly emails and resources from Somer HERE!

In today's conversation Author and Biblical archaeologist, Amanda Hope Haley, shares her passion for God's Word and teaching others to fall in love with the Bible for what it is and what it says. 

Most of us form our Christian worldview based on what we learned from stories in Sunday school, but today Amanda reminds us of the importance of proper context and accurate translation. She also reminds us that we as parents don't have to be scholars to read and understand the Bible and then teach it to our kids.

In today's conversation Amanda and I discuss:

• How to see the Bible beyond the stories and understand the context and background
• How busy parents can teach their children proper Biblical context
• Modeling self care with God for your kids
• Eliminating time constraints when it comes to Scripture
• Let your kids see the Bible bring you to life that they might emulate the same
• How to choose a good Bible translation

And so much more!

Amanda had so many amazing insights to share that we have decided to come back with more topics this fall so stay tuned!

In the meantime, I hope you enjoy today's conversation and walk away feeling inspired and encouraged to dive deep into God's Word in a whole new way!

Connect with Amanda on Instagram and check out her resources at redhairedarchaeologist.com 

Connect with Somer on Facebook and Instagram

Sign up to receive weekly emails and resources from Somer HERE!

 

FAVORITE TAKEAWAYS:

“When we talk about a bible story, then it’s one short little clip that by definition has been extracted from the scripture around it, its taken out of context.  And no matter how big that bit of the story is, once you’ve made a clip you’re losing something on either side of it. I think maybe that is where a lot of…in the places where we have wrong interpretations of scripture comes from the ways that we clip them.” 

“So when you clip out stories, you miss the greater point, often times.” 

 

The preparation. God prepares men and women through their entire life for the role He needs them to fill, like David and like Amanda. 

 

“Everything that seems to be out there in the marketplace [for understanding the Bible] right now seems to be quick and easy. And the thing is, all of that completely undercuts scripture. I look at the Bible and its 66 separate books written by dozens of different authors over hundreds of years, and it’s a very strange way, on its face, for God to have chosen to reveal himself to us. Scripture is the primary, first point of contact with God, and we see throughout scripture that God is a God of relationship. And you cannot have a relationship with anyone in your life if it’s only five minutes a day or seventy seconds in the morning. We can’t shortcut relationships.” 

Learn how your Bible was translated, where it came from, adjust your perspective. It’s not just one book, it’s 66 distinct writings. “Your Bible has everything you need to get started.”

 

The best Bible you can have is the one you know the best, and that means getting to know your Bible: who translated it, was it one person or a committee, who was on that committee, do they all come from a specific denomination, what would be the leanings of that denomination. Make sure it has excellent footnotes. The really boring ones. Make sure your Bible is being transparent about the decisions they make about the words they’re choosing. 

 

You must be responsible as a believer and as a reader of God’s scripture that you have the best translation, the more transparent and accurate. 

 

Understanding the Bible through the proper lens and context, like the teachings of Paul that have become hot button issues. 

 

Things on the surface seem contradictory. Old Testament: God killing entire civilizations, hard parts of the Bible, hard for our western minds to reconcile, and we have to be willing to pursue answers and be curious. 

Relationships come with question and answer and time.  

 

Humility to say “I don’t know” with all the things in the Bible. 

 

“Maybe we as a society of Christians have been so eager to get our children into scripture early, that we try to make soft fluffy cartoon versions of God’s scripture and I don’t think that's a good idea ultimately.”  

 

Instead of sanitizing God’s word, be more discerning in how one approaches it and sharing it with children. 

 

Traditions are good and fine, but they should not replace the foundation which is Scripture. 

 

Honesty from parents, Sunday school teachers, and church leaders to say “I don’t know” when asked a question about the Bible instead of fudging something or making biased biblical assumptions.  

We can approach the Bible in our own language today, unlike people hundreds of years ago. We have been given this gift to approach the Bible.

 

You just have to start and the Holy Spirit will be there.