After an unfortunate and unexpected meltdown, the show has to kick it old school for a bit.

In our defense, these football references weren't so dated when they were recorded. Cioffi takes us back to his time in Baltimore with the Mafia Minute. Marc has developed a new app with an audience of one. John Salwin answers questions from listeners in our new Salwin On Your Side segment.

Cioffi hosted a fine Italian dinner at his house, and Marc ate an entire loaf of bread. Johnny Blowseller might lose his job at Interscope. Robots are running triathalons, but scientists may have screwed up when programming them. Knife Murder Bot is on the loose. There's big problems on the set of Shrek 5. The show invents a new way to stay super healthy -- The Lunesta Regimen (do not mention it to your actual doctor.) Much, much more.

Marc's curious if guys will respond to a "missed connections" ad that clearly isn't directed at them. Cioffi questions why Marc has his fake email address. Marc and Cioffi get manic for Facebook Fan Request Mania -- benevolent vampire governments, helicopter penises, standard def football, the Larchmont Locos, Doctor Who fan fiction, protection rackets and much more.

Marc went to a Nike event in Hollywood, blew money on dumb stuff and witnessed Joel McHale totally fail to impress Doc Brown. Feet keep washing up on a shore in Canada. The Great Zambrano has a mysterious aire about him. Cioffi finds a way to use the phrase "cream that vagina." Marc and Cioffi dig through the Low Budget Listener Mailbag.

Salwin's shoes are the focus of much attention. Marc feels Jim Carrey pulled a Chambers with an awkward video missive to Emma Stone. Salwin invents "IfYouNasty.com." Marc, Cioffi and Salwin pry into what a listener would need to do to pitch himself to Seena via the Internet. Cioffi gives his Lock Of The Week. Much more.

Marc wants to define a new breed of hipsters that use Bing and carry HP TouchPads. Salwin rides in atop the News Monster with stories of the billion-dollar fake dog nuts industry, Zach Braff stars in another cult classic, people in New York banging away in bathrooms and more. Plus: the show breaks down Steve Jobs' resignation video from YouTube.

Out in the mid-west there's a dog that oughta be mayor. Cioffi's launched his most successful Twitter scam to date -- so successful, he himself was bitten by the bug. Low Budget FM does the Internet a favor and answers open questions from Yahoo! Answers on topics like learning to never sleep, dream reality vs. mushroom reality, being the healthiest man in the world and more.

The Oakland Raiders have kicked off the season in style, with countless fights in the stands and shootings in the parking lot of a pre-season away game. Famed homeless guy Ted Williams rolls deep. Sometimes you need a condom that can tear through water while maintaining full traction. PETA's new porn site wreaks havoc on your brain. Much, much more.