Magic’s in the Mess

Magic’s in the Mess

By Magic’s in the MessEducationSelf-Improvement
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Magic’s in the Mess episodes

  • Part 1 What Does It Mean to Work On Yourself?

    THIS EPISODE IS JUICY! Are tired of feeling stuck? Like what does it even mean to work on yourself? How many times have you said "I'm going to work on myself" and you're wondering where you start?


    Most of the tips out there to work on yourself are basic. And we aren't basic. Our goal is to give you NEW and DIFFERENT ways to think about change.

    Basic ways to start working on yourself:
    Read/listen to books
    Surround yourself with positive people who make you laugh and support you
    Take a bath
    Journal
    Have a dance party
    Let's start with the the root of change which is either:
    Forced change
    Intentional Change
    Either way, you must be willing to change.
    How we see it, START SMALL. Changing everything at once is going to be completely overwhelming and unattainable which means you are going to tell yourself it isn't work; therefore, you tried and no longer need to change because it doesn't work for you.
    Step 1: What do I want to change?
    Step 2: Reflection through asking yourself questions like why do I want to change this particular thing? where is this change stemming from?
    Step 3: Create an action plan
    Step 4: Be consistent with what you want to implement
    GOLD NUGGET: If someone doesn't have the life you want or values you want to embody, there advice is IRRELEVANT.
    DATING GOLD NUGGET: Don't operate from the ego. Ask YOURSELF first if you want to go on the date and if you go, do you really want him to call after or is it just because you want to know he called?
    Being alone is a HUGE part of change. It takes deep reflection rather than suppressing the problem. Solitude will bring up the scary thoughts, the discomfort and the truth lies deep with in. When those surface, acknowledge them. It is powerful.
    Once you start to change and see the hard work to pay off, it's worth it. You will be so proud of yourself. It makes the next thing you want to change easier. Eventually the small changes add up to huge results. We are big habit stackers. We whole heartedly believe that the only way through it is through it. Deconstruct and shed to rebuild bigger and better.

    27 min
  • TIPS to have Thick Skin | How to NOT take things personally

    Don't take things personally because most of the time, it's NOT about you! Unless someone directly tells you what's going on behind the scenes, which would require an extremely self aware person AND a great communicator, you will most likely just be left in the dark. So as Danielle says, you will unfortunately deal with a**holes through your life.

    Welcome to The Hot Girl School! The podcast where we redefine confidence and go way beyond the reflection you see in the mirror.
    We're your hosts Lauren and Danielle, here to empower you to embrace your inner radiance because confidence is so much more than looks. Our goal is to help you become your best self.
    Whether you’re strutting into an event or conquering the boardroom, join us as we explore topics like self love, inner strength and owning your unique journey to confidence.
    So, grab your favorite drinkie and turn up the volume because you're about to unleash your true potential.
    Today we are discussing why you should have thick skin and how to not take things personally. Realizing you can't control those around you is a huge part of not taking things personally.
    Remember when someone is nasty to you, it's because of how THEY feel. Maybe they are envious or jealous but they could also be in self preservation mode. If something you do or say triggers that person, while it's not your responsibility to help them, it is your responsibility to know that you did nothing wrong.
    Most people are victims. They don't hold themselves accountable for their words or actions. It's far easier to point the finger and blame someone else than it is to admit that they are in the wrong. Rather than playing into their victimy drama, which is not hot btw, choose to take the high road. By not giving them the reaction they want, it sets a boundary for you and removes you from further drama. There is a great change that the victim will try more than once to provoke you. Once they realize that you are unbothered they will move on to someone else.
    Keep in mind, this can happen in all sorts of relationships.
    If this is in a romantic relationship that person is demonstrating their toxic traits. It may hurt a lot and not be clear that this behavior is wrong because your blinders are on, but once you are out of it, you will see that behavior as a giant red flag. Be proud of yourself for not letting them get under your skin and be grateful that you dodged a bullet.
    If this is in a friendship, it's far easier to stay away and remove that person from your life because there are no blinders on. Be in control by seeing that person on your terms. Try having a conversation about what happened. If they gaslight you, again not hot, then you know there is no reasoning with someone who is the victim.
    Taking things personally allows the person dishing it out to keep you under their thumb and while you might not even realize it, you are very slowly allowing your confidence to be chipped away. By absorbing all of the thoughts, words and actions from others and thinking that is a direct reflection of you, you will have no idea who you are or who to be since you feel that no one likes you.
    Self love, self care, self development is knowing who you are. When you are strong and confident, you know when someone is bulldozing over you and where you stand on topics that feel uncomfortable.
    Should you find yourself in the same position time and time again, have responses prepared. Being in control of your reaction will give you peace because if you take it personally, that ugly monster might come out and you won't be able to unsay damaging things.
    Remember, you can say anything you want to say as long as you say it nicely.
    Let's Connect:
    📸 Follow us on Instagram: @thehotgirlschool
    🔥 Follow us on TikTok: @thehotgirlschool
    Support Us:
    If you love our content send us direct messages or email us with topics on what you would like to hear about
    Thank You for Watching!


    29 min
  • Take Inventory of your Friendships | SHOW UP & Be the Friend You Want to Have

    We have a checklist for our romantic partner so why don't we have a checklist for our friends?

    Welcome to The Hot Girl School! The podcast where we redefine confidence and go way beyond the reflection you see in the mirror.
    We're your hosts Lauren and Danielle, here to empower you to embrace your inner radiance because confidence is so much more than looks. Our goal is to help you become your best self.
    Whether you're strutting into an event or conquering the boardroom, join us as we explore topics like self love, inner strength and owning your unique journey to confidence.
    So, grab your favorite drinkie and turn up the volume because you're about to unleash your true potential.
    This episode is about friendships. We have a wide variety of friendships and have friendships within in our romantic relationships. When comparing a friendship and a romantic relationship, most of us have a checklist for our partner, but don't even give a thought to a checklist for friendships.
    Here are some things to take into consideration when thinking about your friendships:
    1. How does someone makes you feel while you are with them and after you leave?
    2. Do you look forward to their name on your phone or do you roll your eyes?
    3. If you are finding yourself less interested in staying friends, ask yourself, "am I hanging on because of the amount of years we've have been friends?" Or even to old versions of each of you
    Keep in mind the first time you shed your friends is scary. You don't know who else will show up, what the friendship will be like and the familiarity and trust will be starting from the beginning. In a sense, it's the same reason we don't leave bad romantic relationships....we don't want to start over!
    That is the wrong reason to stay.
    If you feel you are destined for something more and you want to surround yourself with new people, GO FOR IT! When you are ready, new people will arrive and it will feel natural, safe and there will be an instant attraction.
    We give some personal examples of our progression of friendships and as always there are some takeaways!
    If you enjoyed this video, don't forget to give it a thumbs up, subscribe for more inspiring content, and hit the bell icon to stay updated with our latest videos!
    Let's Connect:
    📸 Follow us on Instagram: @thehotgirlschool
    🔥 Follow us on TikTok: @thehotgirlschool
    Support Us:
    If you love our content send us direct messages or email us with topics on what you would like to hear about
    Thank You for Watching!

    32 min
  • This will make your life SO MUCH EASIER | Why you should have a UNIFORM

    Welcome to The Hot Girl School! The podcast where we redefine confidence and go way beyond the reflection you see in the mirror.

    We're your hosts Lauren and Danielle, here to empower you to embrace your inner radiance because confidence is so much more than looks. Our goal is to help you become your best self.
    Whether you're strutting into an event or conquering the boardroom, join us as we explore topics like self love, inner strength and owning your unique journey to confidence.
    So, grab your favorite drinkie and turn up the volume because you're about to unleash your true potential.
    One of our favorite topics is THE UNIFORM! You naturally may have your go to outfit that you wear when you are in a hurry, you always feel good in it and you're always happy wearing it. Without knowing you, you have a uniform!
    The uniform is the outfit that you know fits well on a fat day or a skinny day, a sad day or a happy day and no matter how many times you wear it, you aren't tired of it.
    Lauren's Uniform: a body suit with jeans or jeanshorts
    Danielle's Uniform: a t shirt with a blazer and a chunky necklace
    Having the foundation of the main pieces of your outfit is crucial. This must be what makes you feel the best. From there you can add or subtract to customize it to a specific occasion. In other words, you can dress it up and dress it down.
    When you are in a hurry, wear your uniform.
    When you don't know what to wear, wear your uniform.
    When you are bored with your closet, wear your uniform.
    We will breakdown how to choose your uniform in an upcoming episode. In the meantime, think about what piece or pieces of clothes make you feel good, what color or colors make you feel good, what shoes could you wear all day and be very happy in? There are so many different uniforms out there so choose what you love and show up with a smile!
    If you enjoyed this video, don't forget to give it a thumbs up, subscribe for more inspiring content, and hit the bell icon to stay updated with our latest videos!
    Let's Connect:
    🌐 Follow us on Instagram: @thehotgirlschool
    🔥 Follow us on TikTok: @thehotgirlschool
    🐦 Follow us on Twitter: @hotgirlschool
    👍 Like us on Facebook: The Hot Girl School
    Support Us:
    If you love our content and want to support us, consider sending us direct messages or email us with topics on what you would like to hear about
    Thank You for Watching!


    23 min
  • Different Types of Confidence | What type are you?

    Welcome to The Hot Girl School ✨The podcast where we redefine confidence and go way beyond the reflection you see in the mirror.

    We're your hosts Lauren and Danielle, here to empower you to embrace your inner radiance because confidence is so much more than looks. Our goal is to help you become your best self.
    Whether you're strutting into an event or conquering the boardroom, join us as we explore topics like self love, inner strength and owning your unique journey to confidence.
    So, grab your favorite drinkie and turn up the volume because you're about to unleash your true potential.
    In today's episode we are talking about different types of confidence. After explaining of the common types of confidence, we want to know which type are you and what areas would you like to improve?
    Our list is not exhaustive by any means so we want to hear from you about what we missed, we can add and what you would like to hear more about.
    Here are our different types of confidence:
    Confident and Friendly
    Confident and Loud
    Quiet Confidence
    False Confidence
    Confident and Mean/Bully
    Bringing awareness to how you show up will allow you to start looking at what type of confidence you are or perhaps it helps you realize what kind of confidence you are lacking when showing up in certain situations.
    We all have different situations where we feel on top of our game and others where we want to shrink into our shell. Maybe an adult beverage helps with you show up-that's a fun tangent we go on!
    Struggling to speak to strangers, walking into a room full of people whether you know them or not, how to hit on someone you are romantically interested in, not feeling worthy of a business opportunity are all examples of where there is opportunity to grow from understanding the types of confidence.
    Being confident all the time in every situation is impossible. We are all have our strengths and our weaknesses; therefore, in order to level up and elevate the areas we are lacking it must first be identified.
    Confidence comes with preparation. If you can thoughtfully understand how to become more confident then you will show up in a different energy because you prepared. Each time you prepare and that new habit becomes more natural, your confidence will drastically increase.
    Remember, it's ok to see how someone else speaks, acts or operates and to try that out for yourself. Do you like it? Does it work for you? Can you "pull it off"? Does it need tweaking to feel more natural? If you like the way someone else acts or shows up in a particular situation, steal away! Try it on, tweak it if necessary and implement. This is Laurens favorite strategy.
    If you enjoyed this video, don't forget to give it a thumbs up, subscribe for more inspiring content, and hit the bell icon to stay updated with our latest videos!
    Let's Connect:
    🌐 Follow us on Instagram: @thehotgirlschool
    🔥 Follow us on TikTok: @thehotgirlschool
    www.thehotgirlschool.com
    Support Us:
    If you love our content and want to support us, consider sending us direct messages or email us with topics on what you would like to hear about
    Thank You for Watching!


    27 min
  • GET DRESSED! esp when working from home

    Sitting around all day in the same clothes you woke up in doesn't help your energy level or your confidence. Changing into a fresh set of pajamas doesn't help much either.

    Being ready while you are at home does not mean a full face of makeup, a fancy outfit and being all glammed up like a Saturday night. It just means feeling good in your skin.
    Brushing your hair, teeth and eyebrows will change your energy.
    Rinsing your body off feels fresh.
    Changing your clothes makes you feel like you accomplished something.
    Perhaps a little makeup so you feel happy catching your relfection in the mirror.
    We have discussed having a uniform for all occasions. Having a lazy day uniform, work from home uniform, running errands uniform, all of those remove the decision making and allow you to slip into something that makes you smile!
    One of the pillars of confidence is physical confidence. Most people think that is the number they see on the scale. Most girls we have spoken to find a big chunk of confidence in the clothes they choose. If you know your attire impacts your mood, why not put a little effort into finding what you feel your best in and replicate it in multiple colors?
    Working from home always requires effort if video calls are part of your day. We all know the secret and we are all guilty of sweats on bottom and a work appropriate shirt on top. Gotta love it! Just because the meeting isn't in person doesn't mean a little additional effort can't be given. The truth is when you are on a video call you actually have to stare at yourself which is far different than an in person meeting where you don't.
    Knowing that you are going to be looking at yourself, in addition to being presentable (make up, hair your favorite way, sit up tall, smile) consider finding a camera angle that suits you. Typically having the camera slightly higher than eye level gives the appearance of a slimmer face and body. What about buying a free standing light you so you more illuminated? Looking good on camera certainly brings a whole new confidence.
    Being dressed at home is FOR YOU! Just because you may not plan on seeing anyone that day doesn't mean you shouldn't put any effort into your appearance. Try getting dressed for a week and notice the change it brings about. It's simple yet effective.
    Do you get ready at home? If so, what makes you feel good even though no one will see you?
    If you don't get ready at home, are you willing to try it for 2-5 days?
    We want to hear from you!
    🎥 Watch us on YouTube:  @TheHotGirlSchool 
    🎙 Listen to us on Apple Podcast and Spotify @thehotgirlschool
    📱 For additional content, quotes, videos and the zingers from each show, follow us on Instagram, TikTok and Facebook all @thehotgirlschool


    18 min
  • The Magic of Being a Beginner

    Welcome to our channel! 🌟 In today's video, we're diving deep into the enchanting world of being a beginner. Whether you're picking up a new hobby, learning a new skill, or embarking on a fresh adventure, there's a unique magic that comes with starting from scratch.

    What to Expect:
    ✨ The joy of discovery and the excitement of the unknown
    ✨ Overcoming the fear of failure and embracing mistakes
    ✨ Tips and tricks to stay motivated and keep progressing
    ✨ Personal stories about our failures
    Being a beginner isn't just a phase—it's a powerful mindset that keeps life vibrant and full of possibilities. Join us as we explore how to harness this magic, stay curious, and keep growing, no matter where you are on your journey.
    REFRAME: when you are new at something, think about the fact that every time you figure something out, you are one step closer to being more confident. The more you practice, the more fluid and normal it will feel. The goal is to understand what you are doing so that you are able to focus on how to improve.
    If you enjoyed this video, don't forget to give it a thumbs up, subscribe for more inspiring content, and hit the bell icon to stay updated with our latest videos!
    Let's Connect:
    🌐 Follow us on Instagram: @thehotgirlschool
    🔥 Follow us on TikTok: @thehotgirlschool
    🐦 Follow us on Twitter: @hotgirlschool
    👍 Like us on Facebook: The Hot Girl School
    Support Us:
    If you love our content and want to support us, consider sending us direct messages or email us with topics on what you would like to hear about
    Thank You for Watching!
    We appreciate every single one of you. Remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Embrace the magic of being a beginner and let's grow together!


    20 min

About Magic’s in the Mess

From the publisher's feed

Welcome to Magic in the Mess—where we ditch the highlight reel and get real about what it actually takes to build a business and a life that feels as good as it looks.