I’m so excited to welcome Sabrina Bendory, author of Detached: How to Let Go, Heal, and Become Irresistible, for a powerful conversation about what it really means to stay grounded in yourself while building healthy, connected relationships.

Sabrina shares what inspired her to write Detached and how learning to let go transformed her approach to love, self-worth, and emotional intimacy. We explore how fear and old conditioning keep so many of us stuck and what it looks like to show up as the fullest, most self-assured version of yourself in love and life.

What you’ll hear about in this episode:

What it means to be detached in relationships and how it actually creates deeper connection (4:44)

The fear of ending up alone and how to get free from it (6:44)

What emotional availability looks like in practice when you’ve been with someone for years and how to grow together (16:36)

How to attract love and opportunities when you’re embodying your worth (you get to decide) (24:48)

Shutting down or numbing out in relationships and how to come back home to yourself (41:44)

Resources from this episode: Hop on my email list for updates on my books, programs, and more: andreaowen.com/free

Sabrina’s Book

Sabrina on Instagram

Sabrina’s Podcast

Sabrina’s Substack

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome back to my 2-part podcast episode, where I’m talking about how to “de-center” men (or really anything or anyone we’ve made the “sun” in our lives). We named the pattern: what it looks like to center men and the emotional, relational, and cultural costs when we orbit someone else’s needs at the expense of our own. Today we move from insight to action (Yay!). This episode is about how to stop self-abandoning without burning your life down, and what decentering looks like in real, everyday practice.

I’ll walk you through a clear framework you can try this week—tiny choices, boundary language, nervous-system support, and specific drills for dating, work, and long-term partnership. You’ll also hear a couple of personal moments that show how these tools play out when things get clear, messy, and very human.

This is what you’ll hear in this episode:

A short recap of Part 1: a plain-language definition of “centering men” and why the costs keep adding up over time.

How to spot the pattern in real time using quick questions (“Am I doing this for their comfort? For avoiding conflict? To not inconvenience someone else?”) and a pause before reacting.

Relational autonomy in action: the “Two-Yes Rule”, and speaking your “why” without over-explaining.

Exiting self-silence with nervous-system help: a scheduled anger/venting that doesn’t bleed into your relationships.

Reframing “being disliked for having needs” as data—not disaster.

Decentering drills for real life: speaking first and reclaiming your voice at work, and self-regulation + clear timing in partnerships.

Shifting the ecosystem: auditing your media, re-centering women in your inputs, etc.

Decentering isn’t about rejecting or hating men; it’s about reclaiming yourself in a culture that has taught us that centering men will keep us safe and it’s the only option. My hope is that this episode gives you a practical path: notice the old bargain as it’s happening, choose one small values-aligned action, and let your nervous system catch up as you practice new boundaries. And please try the homework! Pick one domain where you tend to self-abandon, run a tiny experiment this week, and reflect on what your body and inner voice tell you. If this landed, share the episode and let me know what shifted for you! 

Resources from this episode:

Episode 697: De-Centering Men Part 1: What it means and what it costs us

Download a Free Digital Version of my upcoming book, Live Like You Give a Damn

Hop on my email list for updates on my books, programs, and more: andreaowen.com/free

My Ketamine Therapy Journey secret podcast series

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Michele Capots joins me to share her deeply personal story of depression, recovery, and the lifelong journey of becoming. Michele’s experience of hitting rock bottom and finding resilience through it led her to help others reclaim hope and mental wellness on their own terms.

Michele is a transformational coach, international speaker, and storyteller on the power of mental wellness and resilience. Throughout our conversation, we talk about the self-stigma that keeps so many of us silent, the patterns that hold us back even when we’re aware of them, and how transformation often requires grieving who we used to be. Michele also shares why rest is medicine, and how redefining wellness starts with learning to be instead of constantly doing.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Michele’s story of depression, sobriety, and the moment that changed everything (5:26)

How self-stigma shows up and what it takes to unlearn what we’ve internalized (10:42)

The first step needed to break old patterns (15:54)

The grief that comes with letting go of old versions of ourselves and how to navigate the messy middle (22:34)

Practical ways to reconnect with your body through somatic work, rest, and sleep for mental wellness (30:42)

Resources from this episode:

Pre-order my upcoming book, Live Like You Give a Damn (out December 9!)

Want to join me at a Rhythmia Retreat in 2026? DM on Instagram @heyandreaowen or email support(at)andreaowen.com for details.

Michele on Instagram

Michele’s Substack

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I’ve been circling this topic for years in my personal life, and today I’m finally ready to name it out loud: what it means to center men—and the quiet, persistent ways it costs us. This isn’t a takedown of men. It’s a conversation about the water we swim in, how it shapes our choices, and why so many of us end up orbiting someone else’s needs while abandoning our own.

This is what you’ll hear in this episode:

A clear metaphor for “centering men” (the sun and orbit) and how it shows up in real life.

Plain-language definitions of key terms (androcentrism, male gaze, “woman as Other,” patriarchal bargains, comphet, self-silencing).

Why patriarchal bargains often feel like safety—and why the price tag grows over time.

Everyday examples across dating, long-term partnership, work, family labor, and appearance.

The emotional, relational, and cultural costs: confusion of identity, chronic anxiety, resentment, power imbalances, and internalized policing.

How health can be impacted when self-silencing becomes a lifestyle (and why this deserves reverence, not shame).

A gentle invitation to notice where you might be orbiting—and what questions to journal on before we move into solutions.

Part one names the pattern and its costs so you can see it with clarity and care in your own life: centering men isn’t a personal failing—it’s a survival strategy many of us learned. Awareness is the first move. 

In part two (in two weeks), we’ll focus on solutions: how to decenter without burning your life down, rebuild self-trust and voice, and practice relational autonomy in dating, work, and partnership. 

Resources from this episode:

Get updates on my new book Live Like You Give a Damn (out December 9!)

Learn about Devotion and see if it’s for you

The invention of “The Male Gaze” article by Laura Michelle Jackson

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Episode link:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I’m so excited to welcome back Beatriz (Béa) Victoria Albina to talk about something so many of us quietly wrestle with: emotional outsourcing. Béa is a master certified somatic life coach, UCSF-trained family nurse practitioner, and breath work meditation guide who helps humans socialized as women break free from codependency, perfectionism, and people-pleasing so they can reclaim their joy. A lot of what we cover in today’s episode shows up in her brand new book End Emotional Outsourcing.

We dig into what emotional outsourcing really is, how we hand over our sense of safety, belonging and worth to everyone and everything outside of ourselves, and the ripple effect that has on boundaries, relationships and your nervous system. Béa explains why talk therapy alone can leave you stuck, what is actually happening when you freeze in the moment, and how perfectionism can sneak into healing and personal growth.

And because you know I love practical takeaways, Béa shares simple somatic tools you can use right now to come back home to yourself. These small but powerful shifts help you rebuild self trust and stop outsourcing your emotional wellness.

What you will hear in this episode:

What emotional outsourcing really is and how codependency, perfectionism, and people-pleasing all fit under it (3:58)

Béa explains what she means when she says, “you do this healing in relationship…” (25:36) 

Practical somatic practices to rebuild self-trust and move away from outsourcing (32:32)

How to begin to rebuild trust with yourself and hear what your body wants (38:30)

Resources from this episode:

Andrea’s email list:andreaowen.com/free

Andrea on Instagram

Andrea’s coaching and application page

Beatriz’s book

Beatriz’s website

Episode 531: Navigating Triggers and Calming the Nervous System with Beatriz Victoria Albina

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

https://andreaowen.com/podcast/696

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When Maureen first reached out to me, she was carrying more than anyone should have to juggle at once. She was stuck in a business that was draining her, driving hours to care for both parents as their health declined, and feeling the weight of all that stress on her marriage. To cope, she turned to drinking… which wasn’t exactly a new coping mechanism. On the outside she looked like a successful fitness professional, but privately she was stuck in shame, self-judgment, and the feeling that she was out of alignment with who she truly was.

In this episode we do something a little different. Every once in a while I invite a former client to share how coaching shaped their life, not as an infomercial but as a window into what is possible when curiosity and compassion replace shame and judgment. You’ll hear how a single intake question asking, “Is there anything else you want me to know?” opened the door to self-honesty, how coaching helped Maureen finally set boundaries and leave a job that was crushing her, and how one art project I assigned to her revealed what she was hiding behind perfectionism, numbing, and people-pleasing. You can see a photo of Maureen with that project here.

Today, Maureen is not only living alcohol-free but also coaching other women through the same struggles she once faced. Her story is proof that shame can lose its grip when met with curiosity, and that lasting change often starts with a single brave conversation.

What you will hear in this episode:

Why Maureen reached out for coaching: the job that did not fit, caregiving for sick parents, and rising drinking as a coping strategy

The surprising intake moment, how a small answer on a form opened the door to talking about alcohol (and why that mattered)

How curiosity and non-judgmental questions changed Maureen’s relationship with herself and her drinking

The “Armor of Control” art project: turning pain into an image that shows the lies vs. the truth underneath

The science that changed her: gray-area drinking, neuroplasticity, and the empowering truth that your brain can be rewired

Practical hope: how you can get many of the outcomes you seek (social ease, down-regulation, fun) without alcohol

If you found this episode helpful, forward it to a friend who has been quietly struggling. Sometimes hearing one human story is the nudge another person needs.

Resources from this episode:

Andrea on Instagram

Andrea’s coaching and application page

Maureen’s website

Maureen on Instagram

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Episode link:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I’m back with a deep dive into a topic that many listeners have either asked me directly or perhaps quietly wondered about but may not say out loud: what happens when one partner is invested in personal growth and the other isn’t? Drawing from my own journey, years of interviews with experts, and Gottman Institute research, I explore in this solo episode how this dynamic plays out in relationships and what it can mean for intimacy, compatibility, and long-term partnership.

Relationships don’t always end because of one big betrayal or crisis. Sometimes, they slowly drift apart as one person evolves and the other prefers comfort and predictability. I’m unpacking the tension between growth-oriented partners and stability-oriented partners—and ask the hard question: can these two ways of being coexist, or does the gap eventually become too wide?

What you’ll hear in this episode:

At its core, this conversation is about honoring both your partner’s truth and your own. My invitation to you is to invite you to reflect on what you most deeply want in a relationship and to trust your intuition when the paths no longer align.

Resources from this episode:

Email me ([email protected]) or send me a DM on Instagram if you’re interested in deeper work in a new group program I’ll be offering soon! 
691 When Growth Rocks the Boat
668: Lesson 8: Leaving people behind to find yourself
Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I’m welcoming back Wendy Valentine, a pocket full of sunshine, reinvention expert, and empowerment coach, to celebrate her brand-new book, Women Waking Up: The Midlife Manifesto for Passion, Purpose, and Play. Whether you’re in midlife yourself or looking for a thoughtful gift for the women in your life, in this conversation and throughout her book, Wendy shares inspiration and tools you can carry into any season. 

In this episode, Wendy brings frameworks, strategies, and encouragement for waking up to your fullest self. We explore what it means to move through the dark night of your soul, those heavy, disorienting seasons that can actually serve as a sacred initiation into your next chapter. Plus, we talk about self-reflection as the foundation for all of it, including simple ways to carve out space to check in with yourself, even when life feels overwhelming.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Resources from this episode:

Andrea’s email list: andreaowen.com/free

Wendy’s website

Wendy’s book, Women Waking UpWendy on InstagramApp blocker

✨ If you’re in a season of stretching, expanding, or navigating complex emotions in your relationships, I’ve got something coming up just for you. This new, deeper program is designed to help you build shame resilience, reconnect to self-trust, and stop abandoning yourself for others’ comfort. It’s still brewing—but if you’re curious, DM me on Instagram @heyandreaowen or email us at [email protected]. I’ll personally reach out with more details to see if it’s for you. 

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Episode link:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Trauma-informed life strategist Elyssa Smith joins me to unpack procrastination, self-sabotage, reparenting, and the art of saying no, topics that shape how we show up every single day. Together we explore how these patterns are rooted in our nervous system from a young age, why they’re often survival strategies in disguise, and how compassion is the foundation for lasting change. As this conversation highlights, “There is another way of being, and I am going to be curious about it.”

Elyssa’s stories and strategies will give you permission to start small, with what I call “turtle steps”, and remind you that self-compassion is always the key. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did! 

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Procrastination: why it’s more than just a “bad habit” and how it often stems from trauma (4:26)

Reparenting: practical and surprisingly simple ways we can support our own emotional healing (15:46)

Self-sabotage: how it shows up, the role shame plays, and the importance of gratitude and self-compassion when facing it (29:59)

Saying no: why choosing yourself is part of the healing process and how to start saying no without drowning in guilt (43:47)

Resources from this episode:

Elyssa’s Facebook Group: Stress Less Lounge

Elyssa’s website

ElyssaCSmith on Instagram

Existential Kink, Carolyn Elliot PhD (book)

✨Interested in a future Rythmia Ayahuasca retreat with me? I now have details! Drop a DM on Instagram @heyandreaowen or email support[at]andreaowen.com with the subject line “AYA Interested” and I’ll share more information with you.

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome back to the third and final part of a “series” that’s become a whole love letter to personal growth, grief, and what happens when those two things crash up against the realities of our relationships. If you missed episodes 687 (The Perpetual Pregnancy of Grief) and 689 (The Grief That Comes After the Relationship Ends), consider this the closing chapter of a conversation on becoming more yourself, and what that means for the people who’ve been walking alongside you… your partner(s), friends, and family. 

This episode is about that challenging, complicated (and often painful) space where your healing starts to create tension in a relationship. Maybe you’re in a season of deep inner work, therapy, journaling, finally setting boundaries… and suddenly, something in your partnership (or friendship or family dynamic) starts to feel off. This isn’t just about romantic relationships—though that’s often where it hits hardest. It’s about what happens when one person evolves faster, deeper, or differently than the other. And what we do with the grief, the self-doubt, and the desire to stay connected without losing ourselves.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

The three outcomes that tend to happen when one person outgrows the relationship’s current dynamic

How shrinking to keep the peace becomes a subtle form of self-abandonment

What it looks like to “go back to old behaviors” to avoid rocking the boat

Why love doesn’t have to be perfectly paced to still evolve together

What happens when you give someone the dignity of their own process—even if it means walking away

The real reason why some grief only shows up after you feel safe enough to grow

Why your healing is not the villain (even if it feels like it’s causing a rupture)

Reflection questions for your own growth 

If you’re in a season of stretching, expanding, or navigating complex emotions in your relationships, I’ve got something coming up just for you. This new, deeper program is designed to help you build shame resilience, reconnect to self-trust, and stop abandoning yourself for others’ comfort. It’s still brewing—but if you’re curious, DM me on Instagram @heyandreaowen or email us at [email protected]. I’ll personally reach out with more details to see if it’s for you. 

Resources from this episode:

Episode 687: Carrying Grief: A Perpetual Pregnancy of the Soul

Episode 689: The Love That Let Me Feel Again

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!  

MSN is supported by: We love the sponsors that make our show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: andreaowen.com/sponsors/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices