Make Your Damn Bed

Are there things you are saving for a special occasion that deep down you know you will never actually use? Is it a fancy facial cream or a nice bottle of wine? Maybe it’s a pedicure you’re saving for the next vacation. If you’re the type of person who withholds luxuries and joyful acts from yourself, start to question why?

You deserve luxury. You deserve to feel celebrated. Celebrate yourself. Create tiny moments of luxury. Take the time. it's worth it.

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There is no such thing as “falling behind”. We can only fall behind if we disregard ourselves. When we ignore own wisdom and learning, we betray ourselves, and that’s the closest thing I can think of to falling behind. Honestly, if society says you’re behind, but you’re doing better than you were five years ago (or five minutes ago), I think it's safe to say society is very wrong and should mind it’s own dang business. 

Sometimes societal rules keep us and those around us, safe. Other times, they're trash.

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If an 80 year old will take his first ice skating class, you can google something you are passionate about to see where it takes you. 

Get inspired by the people out there doing it. Getting out of their comfort zones, and recognizing that it’s only too late if you tell yourself it’s too late. And like I said yesterday, it’s never too fucking late. 

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Because it’s never too late to be bad at things. It’s never too late to try and to mess up and to try again. It’s never too late to quit and start fresh in a new way. It’s never too late to try and say, never mind, hated that, glad I tried it. 

Until you take your last breath on this beautiful planet, it’s never too fucking late. 

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Don’t ignore the shit that is bugging you. Anything painful, scary, or overwhelming, typically has something behind it that needs to be addressed. The more you build walls up around it, the more power you give that shit. Instead of building walls, build tables and invite whatever you fear or causes you pain to sit, ask plenty of good questions, get real, and see if anything changes.

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Even if the people we love desperately choose never to try to level up, there’s no shame in the lessons learned on the level they remain at. Their lessons will be much different than yours - but it’s not really your business. So, you can hold people accountable for the choices they make that affect you by establishing a foundation of safety in yourself. And you can  sustain the boundaries you establish to keep you feeling safe, regardless of other’s decisions, and that puts the ball in their court. You deserve respect from the people you spend your time with - and it’s okay to let go of those who are struggling with that.  

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We're in this together, whether we like it or not.

We all must account for other’s potential miscalculations without losing sight of our own. We are first responsible for what happens inside our car, but we are equally responsible for what happens around and to it. And while we aren’t responsible for other people’s actions, we are responsible for how we react to them. Shit happens. Luckily, because we are all aware that shit happens, we can be on the look out so we can dodge that shit before it hits our windshields.

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You can do pretty much any online activity, from bed. Research a topic you’re interested. Watch a ted talk or an online lecture while you color or do a craft. Meal plan with recipes and make a grocery list. Play games on a language learning app like duo lingo. Write a to do list. Budget and plan for tax season. 

 Low energy days are normal, and healthy for you. If you’re struggling to get back on track, that’s normal too. Start slow, gently, and realistically. And don’t force it. One day you’ll wake up with a normal burst of energy again and you’ll be grateful you weren’t so hard on the temporary down time. 

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 I encourage you to lean into the often uncomfortable nature of being comfortable. Eventually comfortable will begin to feel comfortable in your body, once you prove it’s a safe place to sit. 

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As a gentle reminder, life is not about optimization. It won't matter who can make the most growth or gains or progress if we’re miserable throughout the entire process. Nobody looks back on their lives and wishes they had focused more on resolutions. 

And, ideally you will want to make healthier choices because you deserve to feel healthy. Ideally, you’ll want to move your body more because you deserve to feel stronger + less stressed. Ideally, you’ll want to create financial stability because you deserve financial stability. You won’t do this shit because you feel like you’re missing out or falling behind. You’ll do it because it feels good, and you deserve to feel good. 

There are appropriate, helpful, and healthy ways to accomplish any of your deepest foundational desires - but you have to get really intimate with them first. Then, take aim and upgrade your systems so you can get a little bit closer to those deep desires every day. The time is gonna pass either way, so you may as well be doing something worthwhile to YOU. 

Read Julie's Medium Blog.

Support JULIE (and the show!)

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Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com

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