Now, men can handle conflict, and they can handle confrontation, they can handle challenges, but they can't handle tears. You know, most men, tears are like the toughest thing for them to take. But you know something? Tears are a powerful language; they're very powerful. They have a language of their own. Oftentimes when someone is counseling with us and they're crying, I will ask them the question, "Can you tell me what your tears are trying to say?" See, when I see your tears, I know how deeply I may have hurt you. Did you know that we can do that to God?

I'm Ron Hutchcraft and I want to have A Word With You today about "Making God Cry."

Our word for today from the Word of God is in Ephesians 4 - I'm going to start with verse 30. Here's what it says: "Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption." Now you notice here that it is actually possible to make the Holy Spirit grieve, or to cry as it were.

Now, you say, "What in the world would be so bad that I would do that would actually make God the Holy Spirit cry?" Well, the answer to that is in the verse that immediately precedes it, Ephesians 4:29. Here's what it says: "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs that it may benefit those who listen." In other words God is saying here that when we say something that tears down another person, we make Him cry.

Many years ago, my youngest son had an erector set, and occasionally he built these monumental, high-towering (not always real stable) structures in our living room. Could you imagine if his big brother had come in (and I'm glad he didn't), but if he had come in and said, "Hey, boy, that's really nice!" and gave it one swift kick and knocked down what he had been taking hours to build? Well, you would expect the guy to be in tears because someone tore down what he was building.

Well, see, God knows that feeling. That's what He's talking about here. He's saying, "You know, I'm trying to build that husband of yours; I'm trying to build that wife of yours; that son or daughter, that friend, that coworker, those folks at church. I'm doing things in their life.

I've paid a high price for them; I've been doing all kinds of work and craftsmanship; I've been bringing things into their life to make them strong, and more confident, and more patient, more understanding of how valuable they are. I've been bringing things into their life to make them more gentle and more caring. And now you have come along, with a thoughtless word, with a put-down, with your sarcasm, with some attempt to manipulate them with guilt or shame. You've come in now with your destructive words, you have kicked down what I was building." That's what God is saying.

Your anger will do it. Gossip tears down people God is trying to build. Proverbs tells us that "Reckless words pierce like a sword, and the tongue has the power of life and death." Comparing someone to other people will do it, criticizing people will do it. And isn't it amazing that God's heart is broken with our words that hurt other people?

David prayed a great prayer, and it is a great one for all of us to echo, probably on a daily basis. I probably need to echo it several times a day. He simply said, "Lord, set a watch before my mouth." Put a guard there. Be very careful to never tear down someone that God is building.