Manly Movie Monday

“Rambo is a PODCAST.”

The gang returns for a surprisingly contentious episode over the 1989 buddy-cop classic, Tango & Cash! The gang is severely and unevenly split over the enjoyment of this movie, we’re bothered by the villain’s obsession with rodents, and we learn the tumultuous and insane story of the film’s unhinged producer, Jon Peters.

"This is the '90s. You can't just go around PODCASTING people. You have to say something cool first."

The gang celebrates the upcoming Super Bowl with Bruce Willis’s football-adjacent 1991 buddy cop action comedy, The Last Boy Scout! We’re surprised that this is kind of a good movie, are baffled by Kent’s ridiculous and inconsistent villain danger rating, and are amused by John’s increasing irritability and aspirations to write a screenplay.

“I have the PODCAST!”

The gang travels first to Eternia and then back to Earth in Dolph Lundgren’s 1987 cult class, Masters of the Universe! We wonder aloud how to make a good He-Man movie, pitch some great spin-off material for Netflix, all while John grows increasingly antagonistic to wards this movie and towards mechanic/time traveler Gwildor.

0:00 - Intro

1:16 - John describes the plot in one sentence

3:23 - Was this a good movie?

10:12 - Half-Assed Internet Research (feat. How to Make a Good He-Man)

23:17 - What are the best lines?

26:46 - What was the most implausible part?

28:50 - The John Matrix Award

30:34 - Who is the best spin-off character

33:40 - Did Courtney Cox create a time paradox?

35:58 - Villain Danger Rating

37:48 - Rate the movie!

“What do I need the PODCAST for, I’ve got the real Turbo Man at home!”

The gang is feeling the Christmas cheer as Arnold Schwarzenegger and 90’s Sinbad scramble to get their children a cherished doll in this festive 1996 classic, Jingle All the Way! We wonder if Arnold actually learned a lesson in this film, if there was a Sinbad genie movie called Kazaam, and the lengths we would go to procure a Turbo Man!

Reach the show at:

Twitter: @manlymoviemon

0:00 - Intro

2:00 - John describes the movie in one sentence

3:37 - What are the best lines?

6:47 - Sinbad and the Mandela Effect

9:24 - Best sequences

10:16 - Half Assed Internet Research

16:39 - What was the most implausible part?

22:20 - The John Matrix Award

23:09 - Who is the best spin-off character?

25:50 - Villain Danger Rating

27:50 - Did Arnold learn a lesson?

30:10 - When would you fail or turn back?

34:57 - Manliness of the movie?

36:09 Rate the movie!

37:33 - Parting thoughts and MERRY CHRISTMAS!

“Very good. But brick not PODCAST back.”

The gang has another Manly Movie “first” with our first flick featuring the Muscles from Brussels himself, Jean-Claude van Damme, in his first starring role: Bloodsport! In a definitely-not-true story, we marvel at JCVD’s earth-shattering splits, Forest Whitaker’s confusing presence in this film, and the longest flashback sequence in film history!

Reach the show at [email protected]!

0:00 - A Matt-less Introduction

2:09 - John describes the movie in one sentence

4:41 - What are the best lines?

6:20 - Nitpicking Moments, JCVD’s “brief nudity,” and Forest Whitaker’s in this movie

12:51 - Half-Assed Internet Research

20:33 - What was the most implausible part?

25:53 - What was the best finishing move? (feat. the Best Movies about Fighting)

29:50 - What would be your personal fighting style?

31:22 - When would you fail or turn back?

32:55 - The John Matrix Award for Best Name

34:21 - Who is the best spin-off character?

36:00 - Villain Danger Rating (feat. Kent vs. Planet Fitness)

39:40 - Rate the movie! (feat. JCVD's star power)

44:17 - Parting thoughts and next week's episode: LETHAL WEAPON!

"If you come back in, I'll hit you with so many rights you'll be begging for a PODCAST."

The gang experiences their first (of hopefully many) Chuck Norris action flick into 1985’s Invasion U.S.A.! We debate the logistics of an actual invasion, and find ourselves oddly impressed by the action sequences and general quality of this Cannon Films B-Movie classic!

0:00 - Intro

1:50 - Who Wore It Better - Chuck Norris or Kanye West?

2:31 - John describes the movie in one sentence

4:14 - Half-Assed Internet Research

10:42 - What are the best lines?

14:40 - What was the most implausible part? (feat. Invasion U.S.A. vs. Red Dawn)

24:24 - What was the dumbest death?

30:33 - Villain Danger Rating

32:23 - The John Matrix Award for Best Name

33:16 / 33:27 / 33:45 - Who is the best spin-off character?

36:24 - Could you survive what happened in Invasion U.S.A.?

37:36 - Did this movie bomb in 1985?

40:00 - Could the U.S. be invaded like this?

42:40 - Rate the movie!

45:16 - Thanks and next week's episode: BLADE!

“The year is 2019. The finest men in America don’t run for President. They run for their PODCASTS.”

The gang joins the revolution with peak 1980’s Arnold Schwarzenegger in the Stephen King classic — The Running Man. We praise Arnold’s many puns, fall into needless debates about fuel and logistics, and if the Running Man could still happen before 2019’s over.

0:00 - Intro

2:20 - John describes the movie in one sentence

4:35 - What are the best lines?

7:26 - What was the dumbest death?

9:27 - Which villain would you rather fight? (feat. a debate about a chainsaw)

13:18 - What was the most implausible part?

18:34 - Could you survive what happened in The Running Man?

22:32 - Are WE living in The Running Man? (Plus: Are You Afraid of the Dark vs. Goosebumps)

26:39 - Villain danger rating

31:09 - Rate the movie!

34:14 - Thanks and next week’s episode: INVASION U.S.A.

“I am an F. B. I. PODCAST!” The gang continues to explore the Keanussance with 1991’s ~EXTREME~ surf bro-venture, Point Break. We debate if Patrick Swayze’s character gets any kind of comeuppance (he really doesn’t), if Keanu Reeves was bad at his job (he was), and the general Gary Busey of it all (it’s a lot).

0:00 - Intro

1:36 - John describes the movie in one sentence

2:41 - What are the best lines?

5:18 - What was the most implausible part? (feat. a Fast and Furious detour)

13:55 - Examining Gary Busey

18:30 - Patrick Swayze’s Comeuppance

21:23 - What was the dumbest death?

23:33 - What death would you have preferred?

24:22 - Could you survive what happened in Point Break? (feat. a Quentin Tarantino detour)

29:17 - Villain danger rating

30:57 - Manliness character rating (units: biceps)

32:08 - Do surfers have beards?

32:37 - Rate the movie!

35:13 - Thanks and next week’s episode: THE RUNNING MAN!

“Pop quiz, hot PODCAST!” The gang takes an implausibly fast bus ride through a suspiciously traffic-less downtown Los Angeles while reviewing the 1994 action-packed thrill ride: SPEED! We argue if a bus could do what the movie asserts it can, if the movie holds up, if Dennis Hopper is a dangerous man or not, and many more points of contention!

0:00 - Intro

1:38 - John describes the movie in one sentence

3:38 - What are the best lines?

6:10 - What was the most implausible part?

8:24 - What was the dumbest death?

10:57 - What death would you have preferred?

12:53 - Could you survive what happens in Speed?

16:00 - Villain danger rating (feat. more needless relitigation over the 4-point rating system!)

20:51 - Keanu Reeves vs. Sandra Bullock — hotter now or hotter in 1994?

21:47 - Rate the movie!

23:33 - Thanks and next week’s episode: POINT BREAK!

**BONUS CONTENT ALERT**

The boys get sidetracked applying the MMMDR (Manley Movie Monday Danger Rating) to all the best movies they've seen over the past year, including but not limited to: Independence Day, Aliens, The Thing, Terminator 2, Air Force One, Con-Air, Highlander, and more! Marvel as they also needlessly argue over the MMMDR's 4-point rating system!

Join us next week for 1994's Speed!