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Shownotes compliments of our Chat-GPT girlfriends:

In this fully sober, totally not drug-sponsored episode, Mike and Doug return to their roots — and by roots, we mean deep dives into Real Salt Lake fandom, the mystery of beef tallow, cum rot, and just how clean a man’s emissions can get.

✨ Expect:

• The entrepreneurial launch of Doug’s Numb Cum™ — a ketamine-infused colostrum-based facial cleanser and yeast starter (great for sourdough and skincare).
• A spiritual rebirth through soccer hooliganism.
• A heartfelt bro-down on wounded masculinity, mommy wounds, and what it means to set boundaries without fawning for love.
• A peek behind the curtain of podcast dynamics, drunken sabotage, and sweet reconciliation (but no makeup sex this time… probably).
• Plus: Can Elton John still bone in peace? Is "fo sho" racist? And why does the feminine rising scare the patriarchy so damn much?

Oh, and don't worry, folks — this episode is 100% approved by the D.A.R.E. program. Big anti-drug bucks paid for this message. We’re just the cautionary tales.

🖤 Come for the colostrum, stay for the companionship inventory.

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