My friend once visited Japan and the first thing he asked me was 'WTF is that noise?' 

Okay immune system I'm gunnaneedjada go ahead 

I bet the CEO of Circle K is pissed that they didn't name the store after a date on the calendar, missed all that free advertsing! 

Better get ready for summer. 

Oh what now you're gunna tell me China is a fake country huh? 

There was a sumo guy in UFC 1. 

I saw a Kardashian Butt Monster, put my name on the board! 

Let's stay positive hehehe 

Every animal I eat is vegan. 

I won't vote for any politician that doesn't support mandatory holiday fireworks.