Understanding Reverse Mortgages: A Financial Tool for Divorce Professionals and Gray Divorces | Laura Phillips

http://www.MediatorPodcast.com

Hi, welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about all things related to mediation, negotiation, and settlement offers.

My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a financial mediator and corporate valuation expert based in St. Louis, Missouri. I’ve authored several books, including Anchor the Deal, which focuses on divorce mediation and negotiating settlement offers.

But my guest today is a renowned expert in her field. Please welcome Laura Phillips to the podcast. She's a reverse mortgage specialist based in Colorado and also services clients in Florida, California, and Arizona. With over 25 years of experience in real estate lending, she brings an option to the mediation table that many professionals may not be aware of—and therefore may not be utilizing.

This is an especially relevant tool when working with couples going through gray divorce, or for financial advisors focused on preserving retirement assets. There’s a lot to unpack here today.

Welcome, Laura! 

5 Key Takeaways:

• Modern Reverse Mortgages Are Safer and More Flexible
• Ideal for Seniors in Gray Divorce Situations
• Misconceptions Are Common but Often Incorrect
• A Strategic Tool for Advisors, Mediators, and Investors
• Funds Can Be Used for Anything—with No Monthly Payments

Questions you may ask before watching this episode:
1. What is a reverse mortgage and how does it work?
A reverse mortgage is a loan available to homeowners aged 62 and older that allows them to convert home equity into cash without selling their home or making monthly mortgage payments. The loan is repaid when the homeowner moves out, sells the home, or passes away.

2. Who is a good candidate for a reverse mortgage?
Seniors aged 62+ who want to stay in their home long-term and need to supplement retirement income, pay for care, or avoid tapping into retirement accounts. It's also useful for those receiving a house in a divorce and needing access to equity.

3. Can you use a reverse mortgage in a divorce settlement?
Yes. Reverse mortgages are increasingly used in gray divorces to help one party retain the home while paying the other their share of the equity, without needing to sell the property or liquidate investments.

4. Do you lose ownership of your home with a reverse mortgage?
No. You retain full ownership and remain on the title. The reverse mortgage is simply a lien on the home—just like a traditional mortgage.

5. What happens to the home when the borrower dies or moves out?
Heirs can choose to repay the loan and keep the home or sell the property. If the home sells for less than the loan balance, heirs owe nothing more—because reverse mortgages are non-recourse loans.

6. Are reverse mortgage proceeds taxable?
Generally, no. Reverse mortgage proceeds are considered loan advances and not income, so they are usually not subject to federal income tax. However, borrowers should consult a tax advisor for personal situations.

7. Can reverse mortgage funds be used to invest or buy another property?
Yes. While the reverse mortgage must be on your primary residence, funds can be used however you wish—including buying investment property, making home modifications, or starting a business.

Connect with Laura:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurawphillips/
https://myhomeloandenver.com/

Connect with Melissa:
Melissa Gragg  
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Divorce Mediation Consulting: Preparation is Necessary - Divorce Mediation Experts | MediatorPodcast.com

Watch the full podcast here

Welcome to MediatorPodcast.com — a podcast and video series focused on mediation, negotiation, and collaboration. I'm Melissa Gragg, a valuation expert and divorce financial mediator based in St. Louis, Missouri. In this episode, I sit down with Rosalia Labate, a New York-based Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) and CPA, who provides services like forensic accounting, asset tracing, lifestyle analysis, and business valuation.

We dive into a crucial question for anyone facing divorce: Should you prepare a financial settlement offer before hiring an attorney or attending mediation? This conversation explores the strategy behind financial preparation, how to avoid emotional and financial pitfalls, and what really happens when you show up to mediation unprepared.

🔑 5 Key Takeaways:
Start With a Financial Plan, Not a Lawsuit
Before hiring an attorney or filing for divorce, meet with a financial expert to understand your assets, debts, income, and potential settlement options. This strategy gives you control from the start.

Settlement Offers Can Save Time and Money
Walking into mediation with a draft offer based on your financial reality can make the process faster, clearer, and more cost-effective — even if it’s not complete.

Mediators Aren’t Mind Readers
If you don’t present your key issues (like separate property, business valuation, or marital waste), they may never be considered. Create a clear summary to guide the conversation.

Missing Documents = Missed Opportunities
If you suspect missing assets or financial deception, bring evidence (bank statements, summaries of transactions) to the first mediation — or risk losing the chance to address them later.

Know Your Role and Build a Team
Whether you use a consulting attorney or a financial neutral, having a trusted expert in your corner improves outcomes. Prepare, practice, and know when to speak — and when to let your expert lead the negotiation.

Connect with Rosalia Labate
Visit Rosalia's Website

Melissa Gragg is a seasoned financial mediator and business valuation expert with over 20 years of experience. She specializes in helping couples and business partners navigate complex financial disputes during divorce and separation. As the founder of Bridge Valuation Partners and a key member of The Divorce Allies, Melissa offers neutral, third-party services including business valuations, pension assessments, income analysis, and strategic settlement planning. 

The Divorce Allies is a collaborative network of professionals dedicated to providing comprehensive support during the divorce process. Their team includes experts in financial mediation, high-conflict divorce coaching, mortgage planning, co-parenting education, and post-divorce transition. Together, they aim to empower individuals with the resources and guidance needed to achieve amicable and informed resolutions.

https://www.valuationmediation.com
https://www.thedivorceallies.com
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com
https://www.ValuationPodcast.com

Connect with Melissa:
Melissa Gragg  
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
Cell: (314) 541-8163

What is ProSe Consulting and How to Utilize a Pro Se Advocate to Reach a Divorce Settlement - MediatorPodcast.com with Tracey Bee

Hi, welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation, and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a Valuation Expert and Divorce Financial Mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. 

Today, we're talking about divorce mediation consulting with Tracy Bee, who is a Pro Se Divorce Advocate. She's located in New Jersey, and she's also a divorce lawyer and mediator servicing clients around the country. 

A pro se advocate is a professional who assists individuals who choose to represent themselves in legal matters, especially in court, without the full representation of a lawyer. This type of advocacy is important because it empowers individuals by helping them understand and navigate the complexities of the legal system on their own. Pro se advocates offer guidance and support, ensuring that self-representing individuals are not disadvantaged by their lack of legal knowledge. They play a crucial role in providing educational resources, strategic advice, and moral support, making the legal process more accessible and less intimidating for those who cannot afford or choose not to hire a full-time attorney.

Podcast Takeaways: 
Understanding Pro Se Representation: Pro se, or self-representation, is a legal process where an individual opts to represent themselves in court without the direct representation of a lawyer. Tracy emphasizes the empowerment aspect of pro se representation, advocating for one's rights and navigating the legal system with more personal control and potentially less financial burden.

The Role of a Pro Se Divorce Advocate: As a pro se divorce advocate, Tracy provides strategic guidance and advocacy, helping clients understand the intricacies of family court. Her role is crucial in preparing clients not only for the legal battles but also for managing the personal and emotional challenges that come with divorce proceedings.

Challenges and Solutions in Pro Se Representation: Tracy highlights the systemic resistance against pro se litigants, such as biases from legal professionals and inherent complexities of the court system. However, she also outlines solutions like educational resources, strategic planning, and occasional consultations with legal experts to bridge knowledge gaps.

Empowering Through Education and Preparation: A significant part of Tracy's advocacy involves educating her clients about the realities of family court, debunking myths, and setting realistic expectations. She stresses the importance of thorough preparation and understanding one’s rights and responsibilities within the legal framework.

Collaboration and Support Networks: Tracy discusses the importance of collaboration between various professionals, including legal advisors, financial experts, and mental health professionals, to provide a comprehensive support system for individuals navigating divorce pro se.

Connect with Tracey Bee:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/familycourtstrategist/
https://thedivorcesolutionist.com/

Connect with Melissa:
Melissa Gragg  
CVA, MAFF 
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com  
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com  
https://www.valuationmediation.com  
https://www.thedivorceallies.com/
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Common Myths Around Financial Aspects of Divorce #3 - A Business Valuation Will Cost 5-Figures

Hi, welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation, and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a valuation expert and divorce financial mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. Today, we are with Rosalia Labate, and we're discussing myths in divorce. Rosalia is located in New York and is a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and a Certified Public Accountant. She also provides services such as financial forensics, lifestyle analysis, and business valuations. We've been discussing myths surrounding the financial aspects of divorce. One myth we're going to address today is the belief that a business valuation will cost you five figures. Rosalia, is that a myth, or should it be a legitimate concern?

Podcast episode takeaways:
Myth Debunked on Cost: Business valuations do not always cost five figures; the price varies based on the depth of analysis required and the complexity of the business. Simple reviews could cost less, especially in mediation contexts where full detailed reports might not be necessary.

Different Levels of Valuation: There are levels to business valuations depending on the couple's needs—from basic reviews using tax returns to detailed examinations involving financial statements and underlying records.

Mediation Misconceptions: In mediation, there's a misconception that expensive experts are unnecessary. However, expert involvement can uncover critical financial details such as personal expenses disguised as business costs, significantly affecting settlements.

The Value of Neutrality: Utilizing a neutral business valuator can provide a more balanced and realistic appraisal of the business value, which can be crucial for fair negotiations in mediations.

Importance of Financial Understanding: Comprehensive financial analysis by experts can reveal discrepancies and hidden assets not apparent through simple document reviews, highlighting the importance of professional involvement in financial settlements during a divorce.

Rosalia Labate
https://labatecpa.com/
(516) 996-7788
[email protected]

Melissa Gragg
CVA, MAFF
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com  
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com  
https://www.valuationmediation.com  
https://www.thedivorceallies.com/
Cell: (314) 541-8163

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Common Myths Around Financial Aspects of Divorce #2 - "I Don't Need a Business Valuation" 

Hi, welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation, and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a valuation expert and divorce financial mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. Today, we are joined by Rosalia Labate, a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and Certified Public Accountant located in New York.

Another common thing we hear is, "I don't need a business valuation." Listen to the full episode for why this is a myth.

Podcast takeaways:

Misconception About Business Valuation Necessity:
A key takeaway from our discussion is debunking the myth that business valuations are unnecessary if the financial figures appear straightforward from tax returns. Rosalia emphasizes that underestimating the complexity of a business's worth can lead to significant financial discrepancies in divorce settlements.

The Importance of Specialist Involvement:
We stress the critical role of engaging a valuation specialist early in the divorce proceedings to ensure that all financial aspects are thoroughly analyzed. This is especially vital in complex cases where substantial assets are involved, ensuring that all parties have a clear and accurate financial understanding.

Risks of Non-Professional Valuation:
The conversation highlighted the dangers of relying on non-experts for business valuation, such as attorneys or accountants who may lack the necessary valuation expertise. This can lead to inadequate assessments and potential financial losses.

Verification and Validation Essential:
Trust but verify was a recurring theme, underscoring the need for meticulous verification of all financial data presented during divorce negotiations. This approach prevents potential manipulation and ensures fairness in the valuation process.

Collaborative Approach Between Experts and Attorneys:
Finally, the podcast advocates for a collaborative approach between financial experts and attorneys. This synergy enhances the accuracy of financial affidavits and valuations, providing clients with well-rounded, expert-driven support throughout their divorce proceedings.


Rosalia Labate
https://labatecpa.com/
(516) 996-7788
[email protected]

Melissa Gragg
CVA, MAFF
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com  
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com  
https://www.valuationmediation.com  
https://www.thedivorceallies.com/
Cell: (314) 541-8163


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Common Myths Around Financial Aspects of Divorce - #1 Attorneys Should File Financial Affidavits

Hi, welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation, and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a valuation expert and divorce financial mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. Today, we are joined by Rosalia Labate, a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and Certified Public Accountant located in New York. She specializes in financial forensics, divorce finances, and business valuations. Although we work in a lot of the same spaces, our approaches differ slightly.

In this podcast series, we will explore three common myths surrounding the financial aspects of divorce. This will be a conversational podcast featuring two financial experts with decades of experience in divorce. We often encounter the same questions from our clients, so we thought it would be interesting to offer different perspectives on these myths.

Today, we'll discuss Myth One, which has been widely debated online, including on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. The myth in question is that an attorney is the best person to file the financial affidavit. Rosalia, could you start us off by explaining this myth, and what exactly a financial affidavit is?

Rosalia Labate
https://labatecpa.com/
(516) 996-7788
[email protected]

Melissa Gragg
CVA, MAFF, CDFA  
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com  
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com  
https://www.valuationmediation.com  
https://www.thedivorceallies.com/
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Negotiation Beyond the Zeros: High Net Worth Divorce Strategy. Million dollar divorce? Billion dollar divorce? Try not to get blinded by these numbers. It's all strategy. 

In this episode, we are speaking with Beth McCormack. She's a Divorce and Family Law Partner at Beerman, LLP in Chicago. Beth focuses on highly complex family law matters and has experience in complex litigation as well as mediation and collaborative law.

Welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a Valuation Expert and Divorce Financial Mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. 

Questions discussed:
What is typically involved in a billion-dollar divorce?
What are some issues billionaires fight over in divorce that most people wouldn’t even consider?
How do negotiation tactics differ between a million-dollar and a billion-dollar divorce?
What’s most important when crafting a strategy for a high net worth divorce?
Are there specific laws that give high net worth individuals leverage in divorce negotiations?
Is it more challenging to manage the legal team and other experts when dealing with high net worth divorces?
What negotiation techniques are most effective when every dollar counts in a divorce?

https://www.thedivorceallies.com/
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com
https://www.valuationmediation.com

Melissa Gragg CVA, MAFF 
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues  
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC  
[email protected]  
http://www.BridgeValuation.com  
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com  
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com  
https://www.valuationmediation.com  
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Beth McCormack
[email protected]
https://www.beermannlaw.com/team/beth-f-mccormack/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/beth-mccormack-0453a84/


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In this episode, we're speaking about the Business of Negotiation, Inherited Trauma and Family Wealth with Ruschelle Khanna. She's a family advisor, mediator and therapist in West Virginia. She helps create small, strong bonds between parents and adult children in order to live healthy financially secure lives. In mediation we deal with a lot of high conflict around the financial aspects of divorce, and we also deal with a lot of family and generational wealth. And with that comes a bunch of relationship issues and trauma that people start to unpack when they start getting divorced.

Hi, welcome to the MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation, and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a valuation expert and divorce financial mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. 

Topics discussed:
How do you negotiate with difficult personalities?
How is mediation a tool to use when conflict is high in business or family matters?
Do you see addictive behaviors or other personality traits in high-conflict families?

Melissa Gragg CVA, MAFF
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC
[email protected]
http://www.BridgeValuation.com
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com
https://www.valuationmediation.com
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Ruschelle Khanna
[email protected]
https://www.ruschellekhanna.com/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/ruschelle-khanna-lifestyle-for-legacy/

In this episode we are with Laurie Israel - a national Prenuptial Agreement Mediator, Consultant, Lawyer, and author of the Generous Prenup: How to Support Your Marriage and Avoid the Pitfalls. She's located in Massachusetts and has been an attorney for over 35 years.

We discuss prenups and postnups and who needs them and why. Laurie has a different way of looking at prenups and in this episode describes who they are beneficial for and who might not need one.

Hi, welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm a Valuation Expert and Divorce Financial mMediator in St. Louis, Missouri.

Topics discussed:
The Risks and Benefits of Prenuptial Agreements
State Laws and Financial Discussions in Marriage
The Emotional and Relational Impact of Prenuptial Agreements
The Role of Mediation in Formulating Prenuptial Agreements
Future of Marriage and the Evolving Perception of Prenuptial Agreements

Melissa Gragg CVA, MAFF
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC
[email protected]
http://www.BridgeValuation.com
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com
https://www.valuationmediation.com
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Laurie Israel
https://www.laurieisrael.com/
[email protected]
Laurie's Book


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Today we're talking about relationship issues and things to consider before you call a divorce attorney with Jackie Harounian, she's a family law attorney in Long Island, New York. It could be months, years that you're considering ending a relationship. Sometimes we spend a lot of time in this thought process of "What could I do, what should I do? I don't know if this is right." Before we even get into this type of situation where you're actually calling a divorce lawyer, which really is way down the pipeline that you're ready to go. But what are the first steps that couples should take when they're even considering divorce or having some issues?

Welcome to MediatorPodcast.com, a podcast and video series about mediation, negotiation and collaboration. My name is Melissa Gragg, and I'm Valuation Expert and Divorce Financial Mediator in St. Louis, Missouri. 

Questions Discussed:
What are the first steps couples should take when they start experiencing serious relationship issues?
What are the most common mistakes couples make when considering divorce?
How can a pre-nup or prenuptial agreement act as insurance in a marriage?
What is a legal separation and how is it different from a divorce?
What is a "post-nup" and when should couples decide to explore this option?
When is mediation a better option than litigation?

Melissa Gragg CVA, MAFF
Expert testimony for financial and valuation issues
Bridge Valuation Partners, LLC
[email protected]
http://www.BridgeValuation.com
http://www.ValuationPodcast.com
http://www.MediatorPodcast.com
https://www.valuationmediation.com
Cell: (314) 541-8163

Jackie Harounian
Wisselman Harounian Family Law
https://lawjaw.com/
[email protected]