This summer I read two books back to back — one fiction, one nonfiction — and they ended up talking to each other in a way I couldn't have planned. Culpability by Bruce Holsinger is a family drama about an autonomous vehicle accident and the AI-ethicist mother whose secret work sits at the center of it. Co-Intelligence by Ethan Mollick is the clear-eyed, cautiously optimistic case for engaging with AI as a co-worker, co-teacher, and coach. I used my Claude enabled book-club wheel widget to pull questions from both, and we get into culpability, cultural conditioning, the heat and chaos of this AI moment, and a very fun casting call — plus a real-time gut check on the Meta settlement news that broke the same week.

Everyone's feed said "kinda chic" this summer — Drew Barrymore's was, Reese Witherspoon's was, Priyanka Chopra's was too. In this solo episode, Erin traces the "kinda chic" trend from its quiet April 2026 origins on Instagram to its full celebrity-mainstream moment in August, unpacks why a three-word phrase gave so many women an "exhale" they didn't know they needed, and pulls the practice apart into two distinct emotional moves — savoring and guilt-neutralizing — that listeners can use whether or not they ever post a word of it.

Part trend breakdown, part values practice: media observation and permission slip in one.

The "kinda chic" trend is a 2026 Instagram and TikTok format where people caption a photo or moment with "kinda chic to..." or "feels kind of chic to...," followed by something that doesn't fit the traditional, expensive definition of chic — a curvy body, an unglamorous home, an unfashionable habit, an ordinary routine. Instead of chic-as-exclusivity, the trend redefines chic as self-acceptance: whatever quietly makes you feel like yourself, said out loud, on purpose.

The earliest post Erin traced is from April 2026, by Australian body-positivity influencer Maria Begins, who posted lines like "kinda chic being a curvy woman and actually liking it" and "kinda chic growing a human, giving birth, and wearing the aftermath like couture." The trend spread through May and June around body image, then expanded into money and even politics by July, picking up some backlash along the way for creators stretching the format past its original spirit.

By August, it was fully mainstream: Drew Barrymore's carousel ("kinda chic to be in your fifties," "kinda chic to take your dog with you everywhere you go") hit six figures in likes within days. Reese Witherspoon followed with her own list ("kinda chic to be underestimated," "kinda chic to cheer on other women," "kinda chic to start a book club"). Priyanka Chopra posted an extensive list of her own — including "kinda chic to meet your husband at the Met Gala" — with a caption that closed the loop entirely: "kinda chic to hate this trend."

Erin traces the deeper roots even further back — to a May 2025 TikTok moment where creator Tara Colleen posted a gatekeeping "things I find incredibly unchic" list, judging other women's style choices. The backlash to that video — essentially, "who gets to decide what's chic?" — simmered for the better part of a year before resurfacing as the "kinda chic" carousel format by April 2026. All told, roughly an 11-to-12-month cultural cycle from gatekeeping to reclamation.

The format works because it offers relief, not information. A private, often shame-adjacent thought gets relabeled as a deliberate, aspirational choice instead of a failing — and the comment section does the rest, with strangers confirming "same" or "you're allowed," turning a private admission into public permission. Content strategist Rachel Holt, whose breakdown of the format Erin references in this episode, describes the trend's core mechanic simply: it takes something you quietly feel bad about and turns it into a choice.

By August 2026, the format had turned recursive — Priyanka Chopra's own caption joking "kinda chic to hate this trend" is, in Erin's words, the moment "the snake has captured its own tail." Self-parody at that scale is usually a late-stage signal, and Erin notes her own feed already feels "more kind of than chic."

What does "kinda chic" mean on social media? It's a caption format used to reframe something ordinary, vulnerable, or non-traditional as a deliberate, aspirational choice — e.g., "kinda chic to live a slower life."

Who started the "kinda chic" trend? The earliest known post traces to Australian body-positivity influencer Maria Begins in April 2026, though the underlying idea — that "chic" can be self-defined rather than culturally dictated — traces back to a 2025 backlash against a TikTok creator's gatekeeping "unchic" list.

Which celebrities have done the "kinda chic" trend? Drew Barrymore, Reese Witherspoon, and Priyanka Chopra have all posted "kinda chic" content on Instagram, helping push the format from a niche body-positivity trend into the mainstream by August 2026.

Is "kinda chic" the same as "quiet luxury"? No, though the two rhyme structurally as aesthetic cycles. Both trends promised freedom from a standard — quiet luxury from visible status performance, "kinda chic" from traditional, exclusionary definitions of chic — and both, in their own way, became new standards.

How can I practice "kinda chic" without posting on social media? The episode outlines two levels: savoring (noticing something already good in your life without needing it witnessed) and guilt-neutralizing (relabeling something you quietly feel bad about as a deliberate choice instead of a failing) — both done privately, without needing external confirmation.

Medium Lady Talks is part of the Medium Lady community — reading as self-care, burnout recovery, and intentional living for millennial women and moms. 

Erin is joined by close friend and returning guest Stephanie Cunningham to talk about the "Simple 75" — a loosened, personalized riff on 75 Hard that the two of them ran together this summer. What starts as a lighthearted comparison of checklists turns into a real conversation about failure as information (not judgment), narrowing down to "the things that always work," and why the absence of a punitive restart changes everything about whether a habit challenge is sustainable. Steph also opens up about stepping away from the challenge entirely during a family crisis, and what made it feel right to pick it back up — on her own terms — afterward. If you've ever wanted permission to do the thing at 20%, or permission to stop doing it at 100%, this one's for you.

Key line: "Hold your goals tightly enough to pursue them, but loosely enough to survive them."

(estimated from transcript)

Connect with Erin:

burnout recovery, habit tracking, goal setting, 75 hard, self-compassion, consistency, women's wellness, intentional living, friendship, accountability

This month's self-care capsule comes out of a real, lived week — five days of wildfire smoke from the Northern Ontario fires reaching southwestern Ontario, and a crash course in AQI and climate anxiety Erin didn't see coming. She shares a hope-forward book pack, a three-part mental reframe for climate anxiety, and a playful "treehouse mindset" for reducing consumption without falling into restriction or scarcity thinking.

What's covered:

Key framework: "Well-regulated, well-rested, well-fed, well-supported communities are what save the world — not individual hypervigilance."

Books mentioned:

Join in: 100 Days of Gratitude, Instagram @medium.lady

Support: Donate to the Anishinabek Nation 7th Generation Charity — CRA-registered, supporting Anishinabek Nation communities affected by the wildfires.

After six seasons of letting the productivity ball get bigger than the creativity ball, Erin's shaking up the format — starting with an unscripted, wheel-spun review of Just Watch Me by Lior Torenberg, built with a little help from Claude.

What's covered:

Key framework: Erin's 70/30 rule for when AI is worth using — the tool brings structure, you bring discernment. (Full breakdown in Episode 174.)

Books mentioned:

Related listening:

Episode Summary

Erin is back at the mic with a confession: she's been taking the podcast a little too seriously. In this honest, unpolished episode, she unpacks the ambivalence she's been carrying as a creator — the quiet pressure, the almost-quits, and the moment a listener named Kate said she just wanted more fun and Erin felt relief instead of defensiveness. From a trail walk with her friend Amy to a summer gratitude challenge already seven days in, this episode is an invitation to skip the optimization and notice what actually feels good right now.

In This Episode

Mentioned in This Episode

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If this episode landed for you, DM Erin on Instagram at @medium.lady — she genuinely wants to know what you're doing this summer just because it's fun.

This episode was originally published in June of 2025

In this heartfelt episode of Medium Lady Talks, Erin shares a deeply personal talk on reclaiming “soft work” as a vital part of healing. Inspired by a moment with her therapist and delivered originally at the Say It Like You Claimed It event with Jam Gamble, this message is a reminder that you can’t recover from burnout by doing more hard work.

Instead, you need softness.

🪷 Erin breaks down:

What “soft work” is and why it matters (think: joy, rest, nature, play)

Why soft work activates the vagus nerve and heals the nervous system

The limiting beliefs that make rest feel unearned or frivolous

The science behind why kindness and pleasure help you recover

How to reprogram your brain to notice joy again

Whether you’re exhausted from doing everything “right” or just need a moment to feel seen, this episode will help you soften into the truth: you are not broken. You’re just overdue for joy.

📚 Mentioned in this episode:

Sacred Rest by Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith

Women Who Work Too Much by Tamu Thomas

Reclaim Yourself by Dr. Thema Bryant

What It Takes to Heal by Prentis Hemphill

Fiction from Kennedy Ryan, Tia Williams, Kiley Reid, and Toni Morrison

💬 Ask yourself: What kind of soft work have I been craving?

💬 Let Erin know what “real rest” means to you over on Instagram @medium.lady—and share this episode with the friend who’s doing everything “right” and still wondering why she’s so tired.

This episode is part of our “Summer of Real Rest” series—time to call ourselves in to a true commitment to the soft work of feeling better one step at a time. 

🧡 If this episode resonates with you:

Looking for more support? Access exclusive content and mindful living tools on Patreon. 

Join the conversation! Share one need you're naming today and tag @medium.lady on Instagram.

The series starts here! 

Don’t forget to subscribe! If this episode resonates, share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps others find the show!

Other Related Episodes (for your enjoyment):

Episode 70: My Life-Changing Perspective on Having the Best Summer EVER

Episode 103: Four Questions to Free Yourself from Summer Stress Part One

Episode 104: Four Questions to Free Yourself from Summer Stress Part Two

Episode 106: Six Things Saving My Summer 

Medium Lady Reads Episode 43 - Our Best Recommendations for Your Summer Reading Pile

Connect with Erin:

Key Words: #softwork #burnoutrecovery #restasresistance #nervoussystemhealing #mediumladytalks #mentalhealthawareness #joyishealing #radicalrest

What do you do when life hands you unexpected free time — not a vacation, not a long weekend, but a recurring, reliable gift of unstructured hours every single week? That's exactly the situation Erin's best friend of over 30 years, Emily Gibson, found herself in when a shift in her employment created free Fridays from now through the end of the year.

Instead of defaulting to scrolling, guilt, or vague intentions, Emily got intentional. She designed the Found Fridays project — a personal framework and Instagram series where every Friday is planned with purpose, organized into meaningful categories including rest and relaxation, house and home, friends and family, and fun and festive. Each Friday has a specific activity. Each activity is chosen on purpose.

In this episode, Erin and Emily explore what it actually takes to move from "I have free time" to "I used that time in a way I'm proud of" — and why most of us fail to bridge that gap, even when the intention is there.

For anyone who finds themselves with unstructured time:

Medium Lady Talks is created and hosted by Erin, a millennial mother building the life that's made for her while fighting burnout, living intentionally, and embracing gratitude — even when she's grumpy. Each episode combines deep conversation, practical tools, and the kind of honesty that helps you maximize self-discovery and minimize self-judgment.

What if the guilt, the overwhelm, and the feeling that you're never quite enough aren't personal failings — but a system you were never meant to question? This week, I'm joined by life coach, author, and mom of four Amber Pecoraro, whose story I think so many of you are going to immediately recognize yourselves in.

Amber is the founder of B'joyed Coaching and the author of Escape the Motherhood Matrix — a guide for high-achieving women to identify the invisible conditioning keeping them stuck and start dismantling it for good. She's a former civilian leader in the US Air Force Government Acquisition, a certified life and leadership coach, and someone who, on paper, had it all together — and privately, was crumbling.

In this episode, we get into the origin of Amber's rock bottom moment (including a 36-week pregnancy, a child with a bone infection, and a delivery room she was left in alone), the physical symptoms that finally forced her to stop pushing through, and the coaching and neuroscience-based practices that changed everything for her. We also dig into the four P's of reprogramming from her book, why guilt isn't a moral failing but a nervous system response, and what it actually looks like to escape a matrix you didn't even know you were in.

What Amber is reading: You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay — a book she returns to regularly with clients, and one she calls an enduring invitation to possibility.

What she's listening to: A podcast on book publishing — specifically resources connected to Chandler Bolt's Self-Publishing School, which she used to bring Escape the Motherhood Matrix into the world.

What's embodying this season: Board games with her kids, ages 6 to 13. Less fighting, more laughing. A season of actually being present together — and finding she's starting to enjoy it.

Who she's learning from: Tony Robbins — particularly after her husband enrolled in one of his programs. She's a student of many modalities and encourages listeners to find what actually works for them.

Connect with Erin:

You've heard the list. Go outside. Move your body. Sleep well. Drink water. Seek connection. Find joy. Get offline. You might have it on a sticky note, a vision board, buried in a notes app. And yet here we are — still knowing, still not quite doing, and carrying a very specific flavour of guilt about the gap.

This episode is not a fix. There are no frameworks, no habit trackers, no systems. What Erin does instead is take four of the eight core mental health domains she's distilled from a decade of reading — identity, movement, connection, and creativity — and gets genuinely honest about what's underneath the struggle to access them. Not in a general way. In a specific, personal, true way.

Including: why resistance training became entangled with grief she wasn't ready to walk through. Why the double bind of "invisible AND excellent" makes creative work feel logically impossible. Why connection has a post-interaction audit problem that robs us of the nourishment we just received. And why delight has been so thoroughly turned into content that the real, private, inconvenient kind feels like we're doing it wrong.

Throughout, Erin invites listeners to locate their own version of each domain — because your reasons for avoiding movement are not the same as hers. The path through is not a better general strategy. It's a more honest personal one.

The argument at the centre of this episode: you are not failing at self-care. You are living inside systems that were not designed for your flourishing. And naming that — really naming it — is the first act of your own reckoning.

— Why "knowing better but not doing better" is rarely a willpower problem — and what it actually is

— Identity as the foundation beneath every other domain, and what happens when you've lost reliable access to yourself

— The difference between performative delight and the real, private, specific kind that's actually yours

— Movement, grief, and why connecting to your "why" can sometimes make things harder, not easier

— How post-connection anxiety gets in the way of metabolizing the nourishment we just received

— The creativity double bind: invisible AND excellent, private AND public-ready — and why it's a logical impossibility

— The difference between creative work that is produced and creative work that is played with

— Conditioning, cultural compassion, and what's actually missing from the mental health conversation

— Cecelia Baum Mandryk — whose work on unpacking resistance through the lens of safety gave Erin a new way into her movement avoidance. Find her at ceceliabaummandryk.com and on Instagram at @cecemandryk

— Episode 175 — Four parts of self: the part that wants to be honest, the part that wants to be good, the part that wants to be right, and the part that wants to be liked

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