Episode at a Glance

On this episode of Melody and Friends, we are diving into the mission field of Trauma with certified pastoral sex addiction specialist, Donna Dixon. Donna shares her personal story of dealing with trauma. From dealing with a faultering relationship and deaths in the family, to receiving counseling that was not the best for her, sent her into a spiral of depression. However through years of finding the right therapy and walking with God, she opened a new door of hope in her life. Walking forward through that open door of hope led to her decision to become certified as a life coach, followed by certification as a Certified Pastoral Sex Addiction Specialist as well as completing the highly respected Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model training through the Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists.

Who is Donna Dixon?

Donna Meredith Dixon is passionate about creating safe places within the Christian community for healing from the impact of sexual brokenness. Donna lives out that passion, in part, by collaborating with others to train partners of sex addicts to effectively facilitate groups. During her 17 years in the medical field, Donna created curriculum and training experiences that met or exceeded federal and state standards as well as health-care accrediting organizations. Donna is a certified life and relationship coach, certified pastoral sex addiction specialist (IACSAS/C-SASI), has completed the APSATS training, and has served on the board of IACSAS/C-SASI since 2014.

Things We Talk About In This Episode:

• What is "post-discovery" in a marriage and what is the hardest part about going through it?
• How do you approach someone who has been struggling their entire life with sexual addiction?
• What is a trauma-informed approach to training couples through sexual addiction?

Resources:

Our listeners can learn more about Donna's workshops, get resources on trauma and get in touch with her by visiting her website: www.lifeisahead.com

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this episode of Melody and Friends, Melody is speaking with Author Sharon Hersh to speak about Ambivalence and The Holidays. Sharon defines what ambivalence around the holidays looks like and how ambivalence has affected her personally during the holiday season. The Christmas season especially will often highlight a tail of two emotions, one of bright, joyous emotions as we celebrate with our family and one of somberness and grief for tragedies that have happened. She also breaks down that emotional low we can experience after the highs of celebrating the holidays has passed and what we can do to work through those feelings of ambivalence.

Sharon also shares how we can attune our hearts to the love of Christ each Christmas as we walk through those feelings of ambivalence. She explains we have to have an invitational heart that give myself permission to keep healing and admit that we need to keep healing.

Who is Sharon Hersh?

Sharon is a sought-after speaker for conferences, retreats, seminars, classes, trainings, or workshops. She loves to speak any where in the world — to a group of 2 or 2,000.  Sharon taught as Adjunct Faculty at Reformed Theological Seminary, Colorado Christian University, Denver Seminary, Denver University, Metropolitan State University of Denver, and The Seattle School of Theology & Psychology in both under-graduate and graduate counseling courses.  Other subjects Sharon loves to speak on include the courage to abandon ourselves and belong to each other; addiction and life beyond addiction; finding the landmarks of faith, hope, and love in our stories; knowing your sexual ethic – for adolescents, adults, and parents; healing trauma, and self-compassion for caregivers.

Sharon also provides individual counseling for adolescents and adults on a weekly or bi-monthly basis or in the form of intensives (3-4 days of hard work, blood, sweat and tears that is oh, so worth it!). Intensives can include EMDR, somatic therapy, and psychodrama. Call 720-530-1225 for scheduling and pricing.

Things We Talk About In This Episode:

• What is ambivalence and what does it look like around the holidays?
• Why do we not do well with dual feelings and what can we do about it?
• Why is creating an invitational heart so important for ambivalence during the holidays?
• How can we allow things to change in our lives in a way that doesn't creat ambivalence around Christmas?

We encourage you to check out Sharon's books The Last Addiction (www.barnesandnoble.com/w/last-addiction-sharon-hersh/1100618546) and Belonging (www.christianbook.com/belonging-finding-way-back-one-another/sharon-hersh/9781631469602/pd/469606)

Our listeners can also learn more about Sharon's resources, books and much more at the link here: www.sharonhersh.com

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this week's episode of Melody and Friends, Melody discusses the connection between safety in relationships and skydiving. She shares the story of how she got to spend an incredible weekend with her oldest daughter, Ryland, which culminated with them skydiving together. Through this experience, Melody draws the parallels between her skydiving for the first time and the importance of establishing a sense of safety in a relationship.

Melody shares how she was able to place trust and safety in a complete stranger to perform this breathtaking leap out of a plane, and how God used that to help her illustrate how this correlates to those who have experienced betrayal or abuse in a relationship. Just as she and her instructor had to create a sense of safety and trust in order to take that jump, Melody explains what steps women can take when they have been betrayed in a relationship to begin to rebuild their own sense of safety. 

Things We Talk About in this Episode:

• Why is a sense of safety vital for a relationship?
• For men in a relationship, why is it critical to be a true "man of your word"?
• When rebuilding a relationship with your spouse or significant other, what is the most important factor in rebuilding that trust?

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this episode of Melody and Friends, Melody is joined by renowned Christian Psychologist, Dr. Diane Langberg, to take a deep dive into how the church handles women experiencing trauma. Diane speaks about her work in the church and how worship leaders can find ways to work well with women who are walking through trauma.

She also shares the best ways to vet a church, pastor or councelor to ensure that if you are a woman going through trauma, you will be able to place yourself in a place of safety and healing. She describes what trauma can look like for women but also ways that churches and pastors can either raise women up and provide healing, or exacerbate it, and how to tell the difference between the two.

Who is Diane Langberg?

Dr. Diane Langberg is the leading Christian psychologist with expertise in trauma recovery. Her teaching has taken her to South America, the Caribbean, Africa, Asia, and Europe. Her books on sexual abuse remain popular with both clinicians and victims. She joined Missio Seminary as a Clinical Faculty member (Clinical Faculty members are practitioners who also lecture and train) and has a leadership role in the shaping and delivery of the Global Trauma Recovery Institute.

Dr. Langberg is Chair of the Executive Board of the American Association of Christian Counselors, serves on the board of GRACE (Godly Response to Abuse in a Christian Environment), and is Co-Chair of the Trauma Advisory Council for the American Bible Society. She is the recipient of the Distinguished Alumna for Professional Achievement from Taylor University, the American Association of Christian Counselor’s Caregiver Award, and the Philadelphia Council of Clergy’s Christian Service Award.

Things We Talk About In This Episode:

• How can churches and ministry leaders provide health and safety to women who are experiencing trauma?
• What are the steps that we should have to assist our friends through trauma or abuse?
• How can victims of trauma properly vet their churches, pastors or councelors to ensure that they will receive the best help possible?
• What tools can be provided to educate worship leaders and the general public with proper knowledge of what trauma looks like?

To learn more about Diane's journey, books, resources, and more, please visit the link here: www.dianelangberg.com

Check out Diane's Podcast here: https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/podcasts/rise-and-fall-of-mars-hill/

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this episode of Melody and Friends, Melody sits down with Author and Founder of She Loves Out Loud, Diane Strack, to talk about walking by faith in the face of difficult days. Diane shares her story about her diagnosis of breast cancer and what it was like facing each day with cancer. She then shares advice for those suffering with acute and chronic illnesses about how to “Always Expect Amazing” regardless of your circumstances.

Diane explains in the moments of hardship with her cancer, she discovered that God is always there with us. He is always there listening, comforting and taking us into what is next for our lives. She then talks about the creation of her ministry, She Loves Out Loud, which focuses on “gathering the women of the world” so that they may pray together. Diane shows how in her battle and in so many others, that having that group of women alongside her to say, “We are with you.” and sharing in the tragedy and triumph as they prayed together was transformational. 

Who is Diane Strack?

Diane Strack has created, facilitated, and spoken at women’s and youth ministries across the nation for more than three decades. As the founder of She Loves Out Loud, she urges women to engage their circles of influence to “gather the women to pray” and to share the Good News of God’s love and healing. Diane’s message is “Always Expect Amazing” regardless of your circumstances. She is the author of several books, including New Start for Single Moms, and the Co-founder of Student Leadership University. Diane currently serves as an Executive Member of the Board of Directors of One More Child Foundation, a ministry that touches 160,000 children annually through adoption, foster care, trafficking restoration, single mom homes, and international ministry. She and her husband Jay live in Central Florida and love spending time with their daughters Missy and Chris, son-in-law Brent, and six grandchildren.

Things We Talk About In This Episode:

• How do we fight discouragement in the face of extremely difficult moments in our lives?
• How do we avoid falling into isolation after devastating news or events and why is having a gospel community especially important for women? 
• Why is serving others a vital component to the process of healing ourselves?
• Why should we begin to recognize things like depression and despair as spiritual warfare and what can we do to combat that?

To learn more about She Loves Out Loud’s event on November 5th and to register, please visit the link here: https://shelovesoutloud.org/event-info/

Check out the full She Loves Out Loud website here: https://shelovesoutloud.org/

Learn more about Diane’s book, New Start for Single Moms Bible Study Participant's Guide, here: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B007V8Z6W6/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_taft_p1_i0

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this episode of Melody and Friends, Melody sits down with Best Selling author Paul Young to talk about his story of growing up in West Papua, New Guinea, his divorce and reconciliation with his wife, and how he was able to experience rebirth after decades of abuse and trauma. 

Paul shares his story of abuse that he suffered while living in West Papua, New Guinea, experiencing sexual abuse at the age of 5. Between this and having an abusive father, Paul discusses how God is able to show us love and grace in these moments where all hope seems lost. He also explains that God NEVER violates human agency to accomplish His purpose and shows what that looks like from his perspective as an abuse victim.

Paul then explains his journey of “starting over”, meeting his wife and then having an affair, and finally how he began breaking down the walls he had built up over decades of his life, and how he backed away from the abyss of taking his own life. In the end he says that it wasn’t justified, but it was worth it.

Who is Paul Young?

William Paul Young was born in Canada and raised among a Stone Age tribe by his missionary parents in the highlands of former New Guinea. He suffered great loss as a child and young adult and now enjoys the “wastefulness of grace” with his family in the Pacific Northwest. He is the author of Lies We Believe About God and the New York Times bestsellers The Shack, Cross Roads, and Eve.

Things We Talk About In This Episode:

• What is the power of a word like ambivalence and why is that so important for us to understand?
• How do you begin breaking down walls built up from abuse?
• How is lying often used more as a survival tool than one meant to deceive? 
• Where can we turn when it feels like the world is collapsing on us and we feel separated from God?

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this week’s episode of Melody and Friends, Melody concludes her series on Glimmers of Heaven by discussing the day of the wedding for her youngest daughter, Keller. Melody explains how you can still find glimmers of heaven even when things don't go according to plan. 

Melody talks about how during Keller's wedding, the outdoor venue was jeopardized by heavy rain. However, instead of being discouraged Keller made the decision to keep the wedding outside. Melody describes the beauty and grace of holding a wedding out in the pouring rain and how symbolic it was for God's grace and love. Through events like this, where things seem like they are going wrong, Melody explains that these are actually the moments where the Glimmers of Heaven are their brightest.

Things We Talk About in this Episode:

• How can we experience Glimmers of Heaven when events in our lives don't go according to plan?
• Why can moments that seems negative actually be used to reflect God's love for us?
• How can we train ourselves to see Glimmers of Heaven in dark parts of our lives?

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this week’s episode of Melody and Friends, Melody continues her series on Glimmers of Heaven by discussing the rehearsal dinner for her youngest daughter, Keller. Melody explains the beauty of community at the rehearsal dinner, how incredible it feels to see your children find Godly friends, and that glimmers of heaven don't always mean perfection. 

Sometimes, Glimmers of Heaven are like Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane. It is joy and it is mourning, it is happiness and it is tension. Melody talks about how joyous it is seeing the community your children foster with the values of God you've instilled into them as a mother. For her it was encouraging to see that Hudson, Keller’s husband, was truly a Godly man before he started dating Keller, and was not changing to be that because he was dating her. Finally Melody explains how the values of these communal events with friends and family can help point us back to our Father in Heaven and just how much He truly loves us.

Things We Talk About in this Episode:

• Why is community so important for ourselves and our children to experience Glimmers of Heaven?
• How can these events remind us of the love God has for us?
• How can Glimmers of Heaven be something that is both joy and mourning?

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this week’s episode of Melody and Friends, Melody talks about the events leading up to her youngest daughter, Keller Lovvorn, getting married and what she describes as “Glimmers of Heaven”. Melody talks about how she, Keller and her oldest daughter Ryland were able to spend one last day together before the wedding, and how moments like that are able to provide us with these glimmers of heaven.

Melody explains that relationships and interactions with one another are crucial for us to understand the love of our Father in Heaven, and how we can find these glimmers of heaven throughout our daily lives. She also offers advice for parents and young adults alike as they move into life changing events like marriage and how we can embrace and enjoy them as glimmers into heaven.

Things We Talk About in this Episode:

• What are glimmers of heaven?
• Why is it important for us to look for glimmers of heaven in our lives?
• How can these moments help us feel a deeper connection to our Heavenly Father?

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

On this week's episode of Melody and Friends, Melody sits down with Dr. Jerome Wagner to discuss the nine personality types outlined in the Enneagram and how they can help us understand our views and responses to the world around us. Dr. Wagner explains how the Enneagram differs from personality tests like Myers-Briggs and how the Enneagram not only shows us which personality type we fall into, but why we like to fall into that personality.

He also explains how each type on the Enneagram creates our lense of seeing the world, and that each of these lenses informs us about what's important and what might threaten our values. Finally he discusses the importance of how we should look at all nine types on the enneagram and use them as a basis to prevent ourselves from distorting our vision of the world, and coming into the best versions of ourselves as Christ created us to be.

Our listeners can learn more about Dr. Jerome Wagner and the courses he offers by visiting enneagramspectrum.com and www.wepss.com

Our listeners can also purchase his books including Nine Lenses of the World by clicking the amazon link here

Who is Dr. Jerome Wagner?

Dr. Jerome Wagner, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist, psychotherapist, supervisor, consultant in private practice, and emeritus faculty member in the Department of Psychology and Institute of Pastoral Studies at Loyola University, Chicago.

Among the earliest students of the Enneagram in the United States, Dr. Wagner’s dissertation was one of the first written descriptions of the Enneagram and pioneered formal research studies on the Enneagram. Part of his study involved constructing an Enneagram inventory. 

Things We Talk About In This Episode:

• What is the Enneagram?
• What makes the Enneagram different from other personality tests?
• What are the 9 types of the Enneagram?
• Why is it important to know your typing on the Enneagram and how can it help me in my day to day life?
• Why is knowing the positives and negatives of each type important?
• Why should we look at all 9 types of the Enneagram if we only have one that drives us individually?

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!