Miserable Retail Slave

Special guest, Cassi (@mixedfeelingspc) from Mixed Feelings Podcast!!!! *blushes*

An all-female football league/ Curious Vanilla Ice/ Ice Boxes/ The Legend of Touchdown Tommy/ Condiments/ Mustard/ Cassi's Nascar Adventures/ Tommy actually promotes the podcast/ Cassi gets interviewed/ Tom Selleck's cut-out/ Commemorative Plate talk/ Favorite curse words or phrases/ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles/ TMNT in concert/ Trying to get Splinter to communicate with you/ Michelangelo Cassi vs. Chad/ Randy took nunchuks to school/ The Shredder-Krang bromance/ Krang talk/ Hulk Hogan on the beach/ Hulk Hogan's fannypack/ When the quality gets weird/ Greek Yoda/ A real Sharknado/ Pick your horror movie icon/ Harnessing Freddy's friendship/ What would you do if you woke up to find a cat sitting on your chest?/Cassi's fat cat gets a manicure/ Tommy and Abe Falcon drink absinthe/ Cocaine, the drink/ The Convenience Nurse at work/ A convenient Honey/ The Honey Quota/ Diner terms of endearment/ Clarissa/ Michelangelo is bae/ Identifying your turtle/ Online dating updates/ Getting Crawfished/ Wonky Eye/ Reverse Catfishing/ Too good looking to get a job/ Redheads?/ Active profile pics/ Cassi will check your medicine cabinet/ Hooking up with a Hawking/ Cassi's Exit Strategy/ Tommy's worst date ever/ Drinking Hands/ The origin of Hey, girl. Hey/ Cassi's first date/ The first time Randy heard about sex/ Getting banned on Instagram

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

Follow Mixed Feelings Podcast on Twitter (@mixfeelingspc) and Instagram (@mixedfeelingspodcast)!!!

A man who faints/ The Convenience Nurse/ Michael "Squints" Palledorous/ The Deadly Dance/ Nosebleeds/ Big Time High School Fights/ Little Mac vs. Bald Bull/ We're like A Night at the Roxbury/ Running Aarons/ Cardinals/ Condescending Bottle Return Machines/ Tommy has an Honors Degree/ Leslie/ The Regular World 17: You're Only Hot at Work/ A Money Order Disaster/ Hot Leslie/ Gene's in Dead Zeppelin/ encouraging fatal flaws/ changing your laugh/how a pimp do/ A bonfire comedian/keep it flowing/ William Shatner vs. Sebastian Bach/ A look back to our first recorded conversation 5 years ago!/ Randy's ravaged voice/ Sexy time/ Puppy Play/ The Secret Lives of Human Pups/ Online dating/ A saucy tomato/ Those huge oversized glasses/ Internet pheromones/ What are you hiding?/Dating a cyclops/At some point, everyone's got to become shallow/ Those quirky, beautiful girls/ Two face/ The Ranch Daddy/ Who's your favorite red head?/ Talking Rams/ Comb your hair/ THE MORTGAGE/Sign Language Facetime/ The Long, Drawn Out Goodbye/ Irish Car Bombs/ "I am all of a Theisman"

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

(episode 118)

Special appearances by TRB from The Retail Rant podcast (@The_Retail_Rant) and Penrose from Grimelords (@PenroseEames). Cameo by Cassi from Mixed Feelings Podcast (@mixedfeelingspc).

Fit as a fiddle/ Randy is the fiddle in the Charlie Daniels Band/ Fat to skinny, ya look weird/ Tommy as a slenderman/ Tommy's headshot/ Early mornings/ These morning routines/ "Gym Rat" Thompson/ Randy's 1992 hat style/ Thinking Adam Sandler is funny/ Energy Drinks/ Gas Station Pills/ Hiring a sadist/ Encouraging near death experience for alertness/ Soda Bob/Taking an old MySpace survey/ Terry/ What kitchen utensil would you use to horror movie someone to death?/ Gramma Grim & Machete Mick/ The worst gift that you've ever received/ What sea animal would you be reincarnated as?/ Naming a pig/ P*ss On It/ Manager John/ Causing Tommy a tragedy/ Tommy's alcohol moment/ Grandpa had a lot of Secrets/ Mr. Penrose from Grimelords and TRB from The Retail Rant join the Show!/ The Bambi Randy/ Elevated Angles/ Bobbleheads/ Shoot Your Shot/ Don't go for the 10s/ The problem with carpenter jeans/ Volleyball/ Tommy's garlic/ Missed Connections/ "when you live in California, your friends are some weird people"/ Missed Connections Marriage/ starting to reply to missed connections/ The Rust RAW Report/ Penrose and Randy go cow tipping/ The reason why you shouldn't eat in the dark/ Where White People Meet/ Washington Andre the Giants/ Football talk/ Randy is Miracle Whip/ A brief cameo from Cassi from Mixed Feelings Podcast/ Tommy is a grown up version of Bobby's World/ Bobby's World talk

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

(Episode 117)

Jesus' Blog/ Mosquitos on Skee-Doos/ Origin Stories/ Dig Dug/ Randy's Surreal Weekend/ The Bottom/ Tommy opens for Dave Landau again/ Ghetto Rednecks/ Racist Geese/ Owning The Accountant Horseshoe/ Paper/ A Long Table Full of Drunk Women/ Three Apples Tall/ Tommy is the white Urkel/ Lose Yourself/ "If you wanna hear me do another, buy me a shot"/ Going out with Sober Tommy/ What other people would choose to choke to death on/ Tommy's rule/ online dating nonsense/ Update on The Fartist/ Randy needs to change his name/ Reseting Tinder/ Rhonda Rolled/ Woof McGilliculty is sniffing around again/ Dating a pregnant girl/ Introducing Jen Morrison/ The Doors/ Peace Frog/ Go suck an egg/ P*ss on It!/ Manager John/ YouTube is ruining the world/ Dan and Phil/ Polos/ Get Debt, Get Humble

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

A real severe speech impediment/ That blink one eight two/ Letting off steam/ A '90s Indie Romance on the bus/ Tommy's weird dream/ Spider, Leader of The Scorpions/ "Just stay on the ropes and don't drink too much"/ Randy's choking on deadly meatballs/ Those two times that Randy almost died/ Sour ballz/ If you were going to choke to death on any food, what would you choose?/ Miserable Retail Slave for president 2016/ Attack The Retail Rant/ Friday the 13th/Tommy's Camel Hump/ Toad the Wet Sprocket!/ More Online dating misadventures/ Getting a dame/The Suicidal Pygmys of South Dakota/ The Fartist/ The Nightlight/ P*ss on It/ Did Me Win?/ Randy vs. Hot Wheels McCraw/ The Cher function on Facebook

(Episode 115)

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

http://traffic.libsyn.com/miserableretailslave/S04E13._Im_The_Great_Dane.mp3

Against my Best Wishes/ Fast Food drive thrus/ A race against time/ Eyebrow worries/ Randy's mantra/ Eyebrow Lovers of America/ Tommy wants a hippopotamus tattoo/ finally getting compliments by the world's worst person/ My Mother, The Car/ Craig T. Nelson/ Tommy watches "Finding Bigfoot" at the gym/Ghost Brothers/ The proof is in the pad thai/ Preferred zombie apocalypse weapon/ Randy wants a crossbow/ Acting crazy in public/ Woof McGillicuty/Woof's Square haircut/ Missed Connections/ Hose and Heels/ Hot Wheels McCraw

(episode 114)

Theme song: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

Portugal/ Never Been Cool/ Tommy's YouTube karaoke/ So Many Jimmys/ The Dancing Dictator of Portugal/ "Hard Times" by D-Boy/ The Orange Gingers/Tommy's Monster Squad shirt/ People who walk around carrying coffee/ Tommy and Kid Rock/ My Female Bodyguard/ Vanish her/ TomEComedy vs. TommyComedy/ Mixed Feelings Podcast (@mixedfeelingspc)/ Randy "Babyface" Retail-ioni, Mixed Feelings Mafia/ Picking a horse head/ Mr. Penrose (@PenroseEames)/ Manager John's message/ Tommy's hat/ Whatever happened with Woof McGillicuty?/ HAB impression/The Tomb of The Unlaid Soldier/ Beverage/ Dating Mrs. Doubtfire/ The first time that Tommy hit on a girl/ Picking up chicks, right?/ Songs of The Police

(Episode 113)

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

Classic/ Some Mark Twain/ Tommy's big dilemma/ Monocle/ Facebook addiction/ Passing out high fives/ The Boss/ The band, The Band/ Adam Duritz/ The origin of Tommy the Drummer/ Childhood Toys

(Episode 112)

Special Guests, HAB from The Couch Party Podcast (@Couch_Party), Tom from The Drunken Dork Podcast (@thedrunkendork), and TRB from The Retail Rant (@The_Retail_Rant)!!!!/ Floorburgers/ Don’t worry about my Windows/ Tommy’s defense mechanism/Woof McGilliculty/ Unintentional Online Dating Meetups/ Denim Venom/ A follow-up to the last episode/ Randy messes up/ Louie the Dog update/ Guys named Chad/ Absence Tooth/ James Cameron and Avatar/ Spider-Man: Homecoming/ Checks/ Living in the ‘80s/ Daredevil: Season 2/ Tommy drops a bombshell/ Don’t Trust a man in denim/ Tom Coe is one of the world’s greatest detectives/Tommy drank kerosene

Plenty of shout-outs to our friends Grimelords (@GrimeEmpire), Mixed Feelings Podcast (@mixedfeelingspc), Let’s Get Drunk and Talk Comics (@drunkcomicsfans). Check them out!!!

(episode 111)

Special Guests, HAB from The Couch Party Podcast (@Couch_Party), Tom from The Drunken Dork Podcast (@thedrunkendork), and TRB from The Retail Rant (@The_Retail_Rant)!!!!! The Girl with the Pac-Man Tattoo/ Sir Dude/ That Gatorade Bottle Story/ TRB’s Roadside Bathroom story/ Tommy is Venom/ Emergency Napkins/ Louie the Dog/ #LearnFromLouie/ Technical Difficulties and Stories Derailing/ Women are T-shirt tags/ No shorts on stage/ Poems by Pablo Neruda/ More online dating misdaventures/ Wooing an online date via dog puns