Miserable Retail Slave

This week: Tommy's scared of lap dances, Ke$ha has sex with a ghost, Pigs gone wild, Danny Bonaduce gets bit in the face, Jesus was my Beiber, Bagel Heads, MSU professor freak out, Looper, Beard Beer, the cuddle shop, Man escapes jail through a food slot, and remote controlled cyborg cockroaches.

This week: Green Day is in a rehab, Billie Joe Armstrong's meltdown. Chris Brown and neck tattoos. Ghosts like pie. Zom-bees. A fella who isn't master of his domain. Dr Um. Epic nurse fail. If it's good enough for Lance Armstrong. Eating Giants. Wednesday Night Alcohol Poisoning.

This week: We replace "YOLO" and get America's take on Captain America, president. We mourn the passing of Hologram Tupac, hit the Supermanket and discuss the theory of tantric laughter. We ponder why Uncle Jesse got the shaft; Randy vs his arch nemesis, Kevin Costner; and, for some reason, the movie "Ghost." Leave us a review on iTunes!

This week: A red head named Ginger, the true meaning of labor day, Fat Albert, Tommy's off the wagon and Breaking Bad. Plus, we talk about potential jobs, Honey Boo Boo has a TV show. We share a slice of Americana, talk about boom anime babes, Tom Cruise's wife menu and the teacher of the year. Also, snugglef***s.

This week: Learn about the Businessman's Special, The Nacho Fiasco and The Kiss Cam Incident. We talk about Beached, Hollywood's last original idea, and valuable whale vomit. Plus, Republicans say the darndest things, Superman's ballin' Wonder Woman and Chad Kroeger/Avril maple leaf babies. Also, Neil Armstrong, cyclist. Randy writes a Nicholas Sparks movie. And we ask the hard hitting question: does Wonder Woman shave her legs?

Stealing home/ Update on a girl named Ka/ The banana/ The panic of Shark Week/ Sharktopus is a getaway machine/ The Odd Life of Timothy Green/ The heartbreak of Benji the Hunted/ The Desolate Wasteland of Delaware/ Toddler Fight Club/ Tommy's sober again (for 10 minutes)/ Hank Williams, Jr. vs. Obama/ Dueling Dave Mustaine impressions/ Tommy's going to rehab/ Paul Ryan vs. Rage Against the Machine/ Randy's Rolling Stone magazine rage/ Trap doors, Steel Gates, 3 Headed Dogs/ Carson Daly/ Classy Chick/ Osama role-playing. LEAVE US A REVIEW ON iTUNES!

The worst drunken rendition of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air theme song that you've ever heard// Garfield is a racist // Tommy's misadventures with Ka// Pepe Le Pew loves kitty// Were beavers// Tommy does the Carlton// cursive writing// the next president of the United States, Paul Ryan// Wreck-It Ralph// Awkward Hugs// If you fall, you'll land amongst the stars

So, Arsenio Hall walks into a bar.../ Derek Jeter is Minnie Mantlez/ A real life Jurassic Park?/ Saw: The Cruise/ Finding God thru boots to the face/ Randy and Tommy's Excellent Spring Break Adventure/ J. Go-Levs/ Marking your territory/ Randy drops beats/ Elton John vs. Madonna/ beefcakes = meatloaf/ Don Knots: Nazi Slaying Fish.

This week Tommy drinks souls; The Dark Knight Rises is a commercial for something else; You should probably call Carly Rae Jepsen; Courtney Love has opinions; Dane Cook is a douche; Pole sports; KStew hates RPat; Sheep lovin'

Audio alert: one of the mics cuts out until the 7:20 mark. So if you wanna skip ahead, that's the place to start. This week: 40 hours of video gaming; the Man of Steel trailer, with 79% more Kevin Costner outrage; the man who lives with goats; Tommy's pal, Bob Dylan; we review Kreayshawn's "Go Hard (La.La.La.)"; RIP Sherman Helmsley; Sherman Helmsley, the singer; the Olympics; how not to be possessed by a demon; Pete Rose and Fred Willard - dirty old men; Kenny Chesney can get you shot; Snoop Lion; and Tommy begins his transformation into Pauly Shore.