Welcome back everyone! In this season I am going to introduce you to the people in my life, to share their stories and to open this space for more discussions, vulnerability and truth. I’ve never met a more hardcore people pleaser than Andrew. In this episode, he shares his experience with chronic people pleasing, how it impacted his life, how he overcame it, and where he is now. I hope you enjoy it!

Episode breakdown:

• To survive his childhood and adolescence years as a fat kid in Ireland, Andrew became a skilled people-pleaser in order to make friends and become popular at school.
• He describes himself as a “chameleon”, playing different characters with different people in order to fit in and meet other people’s expectations. As a people pleaser, he learnt how to read people and give them what they wanted, but lost his authentic self in the process.
• Andrew shares how he used to stuff down his anger, frustration and resentment in order to please others and avoid rejection. He would go to any lengths to get people to like him, because if a single person uncovered his inauthenticity, his entire world and reputation would be threatened.
• He didn’t understand how being “too nice” could be a negative trait. Now Andrew explains why people-pleasing is actually very self-involved, dishonest and manipulative.
• We discuss how people-pleasing is embedded in most of the world’s cultures and is generally encouraged behaviour. 
• Andrew shares how he hit a very dark and lonely personal rock bottom with people-pleasing four years ago. Completely burnt out and at breaking point, the turning point came when he finally made a decision to put his mental health and wellbeing first.
• After seeking support in therapy and 12 Step recovery, Andrew became aware of his people-pleasing behaviour, and through a process of small steps learnt how to set boundaries, advocate for himself, and not accept unacceptable behaviour. 
• The two biggest shifts for Andrew were: 1. Realising that he can’t control someone else’s reaction to what he says. 2. Trusting that if someone reacts negatively to his boundary, they are not his true people.
• Andrew describes where he is now: his relationships are far more open and intimate, he has healthy boundaries with family members, he feels more confident at work, and he has more time and energy to focus on himself and continue improving his life.
• Andrew shares a beautiful message of hope for anyone who is suffering from people-pleasing.

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Thank you so much for listening! If you resonate with this episode, want to know more about Andrew’s story, would like to know more about the 12 Step recovery program we are in, or have any other comments or questions, I’d love to hear from you! Please send me an email at [email protected]

Lots of love, 

Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode I share what’s been happening in my life since I began the podcast. After recording the previous episode a couple of months ago, I found myself unable to continue. I felt depleted in my relationship and was experiencing symptoms of depression.

When I took responsibility for my boundaries and recommenced taking antidepressants, I quickly dove deep into the root cause of my symptoms. I had a major epiphany that altered my perception of reality, and I subsequently experienced a momentary existential crisis! I realised that I wasn’t suffering from classic depression, but that I was in a process of profound spiritual growth.

Over the last month I have received a lot of clarity around my life and my purpose. I am currently taking some space to integrate my experiences and reorganise my mind, so I can share everything with you in Season 2. I’ll also be introducing you to my amazing friends and boyfriend, because I believe sharing and listening to each others’ stories opens a space for empowering new insights and both personal and collective transformation.

I can’t wait to speak with you again soon!

Lots of love

Josephine xx

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I used to believe I’d feel happy and accomplished if I had the right amount of money, success and material things in life. In this episode I take you on my personal journey: from dreaming of a successful career and owning the big house, to working a 25-hour week, living in a rental flat, and feeling more happiness, contentment and fulfilment than I ever deemed possible. Today I know that the ways in which I choose to spend my time will determine the quality of my life. 

If you find that what you do, and what you have, never feels quite enough, this episode is for you. I touch on so many important topics, and probably the most important one is: choices that have created lasting joy and fulfilment in my life. 

An episode breakdown doesn’t feel appropriate this time… so enjoy the ride!

If you resonate with this episode, or have any questions for me, I’d love to hear from you! Please send me an email at [email protected]

Much love,

Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For over 10 years I tried to manipulate my weight by obsessively controlling and restricting my food intake/calories. Long story short: it didn’t work. When I was finally ready to heal, the solution came. Today I am entirely free from emotional eating, food obsession and restriction, chronic bloating, fear of weight gain, AND I lost the weight I wasn’t able to lose previously. This is my story.

Episode breakdown:

• Due to an absent father, family members with unhealthy eating habits, and many other factors, I was highly susceptible to eating disorders and body image issues.
• I started creating rules around my food consumption at 15 years old, lost 12kg on my first diet at 18, and by 19 I was counting my calories and heavily restricting my food intake.
• I was terrified of gaining weight and wanted to be skinny above all else. Thoughts about food and my physical appearance dominated my life. 
• In my mid-20s I could no longer maintain a very slim figure. I gained weight and felt uncomfortable and insecure in my body. I also experienced emotional eating and binge eating. 
• At 27 years old I was (finally) open to learning about Intuitive Eating. I realised I was stuck in a vicious cycle of food restriction and binge eating. I decided to try something new: let my body eat, and see what happens.
• To my astonishment, my binges stopped when I ceased restricting and controlling my food intake. I was finally free. I could eat what I wanted and stop when I’d had enough.
• When my food obsession was lifted, I realised that my issues with food were a powerful distraction from deeper pains and unprocessed traumas. I later understood that I also utlitised food restriction as a form of self-harm.
• Episodic emotional eating became less and less as I continued to work through everything in therapy and my 12 Step recovery program. I don’t experience emotional eating anymore.
• Over a couple of years, I naturally lost all the weight I’d previously desired to. Today I can eat what I want, when I want, and have no fear of gaining the weight back. 
• I never imagined such miracles could occur. If they did for me, they can for you too <3

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Thank you so much for listening! If you resonate with this episode, have your own story you’d like to share, or have any questions, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Lots of love, 

Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode I dive deep into my feminine journey: why I took the contraceptive pill for 10 years and then decided to ditch it, what I discovered when I tuned in with my natural menstrual cycle, experiencing the sacredness of my monthly bleed, and a very special story about an unwanted pregnancy I had in Dec 2022. As always, this one’s a ride! Take what you like, and leave the rest.

Episode breakdown:

• Like many others at that time, I went on the contraceptive pill the moment I entered my first sexual relationship, around the time I turned 18.
• I was glad to be on the pill because I didn’t have to worry about using condoms or getting pregnant, I could control when I had my period, and they were lighter and less painful. I could almost pretend I didn’t get a period.
• I remained on the pill years later when I was single, and often had sex without a condom because that was the guy’s preference and I wanted to please him to get validation.
• After almost 10 years of taking the pill, I decided to come off it because I wanted to experience my natural menstrual cycle.
• In tuning in with the inner seasons (Winter, Spring, Summer, Autumn) of my cycle, I was able to take better care of my needs and discover the spiritual gifts present in each of the four seasons.
• Through my experience, I realised that the contraceptive pill disempowers women to connect with their bodies and discover the innate wisdom of their menstrual cycle.
• One of my biggest fears came true when I accidentally got pregnant with my current boyfriend. The experience I went through turned out to be profoundly spiritual, and contained many unexpected gifts, one of which was releasing the subconscious judgement and shame I was carrying. I am grateful to be able to share this beautiful story with you.

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Thank you so much for listening! If you resonate with this episode, have your own story you’d like to share, or have any questions, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Lots of love, 

Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode is lighthearted and I love it. I share my personal experiences with recreational drugs/plant medicine, and why I feel my 12 Step recovery journey has resulted in me having quite a unique experience with drugs. It doesn’t feel right to break the episode down this time, so I suggest listening with an open mind - or not at all! As always, take what you like, and leave the rest. 

I accidentally recorded this episode on my laptop microphone, so I apologise for the poorer sound quality. Won’t happen again ;)

If you resonate with this episode, or have any questions about 12 Step recovery, drugs, or anything else, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Love Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I share my experience taking antidepressants over a two year period. Prior to this I was unaware that I was suffering from symptoms of depression. Antidepressants afforded me a new quality of life I didn’t know I was missing, and supported me in identifying and healing the deeper, underlying issues. I am deeply grateful for this experience. 

Episode breakdown:

• I began taking antidepressants two years after I moved to Berlin. I had been suffering from tiredness and increasing exhaustion for many years and didn’t realise this could be a symptom of a deeper problem.
• I had done everything I could to take care of my mental, physical and emotional health, and I couldn’t understand why the exhaustion increased and my moods worsened.
• When I wasn’t able to participate in activities that I enjoyed anymore, I finally accepted that I may have depression and became willing to try antidepressants.
• Within days and weeks my experience of life changed. My mind was relieved of anxious thoughts and my energy levels increased. I didn’t know it was possible to feel like that.
• I don’t believe antidepressants “fixed” my depression, they worked by lifting the heavy, foggy symptoms, creating space in my mind and soul so that deeper, unresolved issues were able to rise to the surface to be felt, worked through and healed.
• In the process I had many important realisations. I quit my job, began therapy and gained more clarity about my life.
• When I felt ready to do so, I decided to come off antidepressants. In doing so I gained easier access to my emotions which was beneficial for my continuing journey.
• From my experience, I feel the deeper reason behind my depression was not living true to myself. Antidepressants helped guide me to my own authentic path.

If you resonate with this episode, have your own story you’d like to share, or have any questions, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Love Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Understanding the concept of boundaries - what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is yours - freed me up to make authentic choices without the pressure of pleasing others. I learnt that nothing in life is ever personal: I am responsible for my thoughts and feelings, and you are for yours. Discovering and honouring my personal boundaries was integral to developing a high level of self-esteem, self-respect and self-trust.

Episode breakdown:

• My ex-boyfriend and I were codependent: my boundaries were enmeshed with his.
• In 12 Step recovery I learnt that it’s not possible for someone to hurt my feelings. In truth, I cause my own upset by the story I tell myself. e.g. “He did that, so he doesn’t love me.”
• I am free to not take anything personally. When someone says or does something, it’s about them, always. I am responsible for the feelings their behaviour arouses in me.
• In recovery I realised we are all free to make our own decisions, and that I never need to be upset by the choice someone else makes. In respecting other people’s right to choose what’s right for them, I gave myself the same freedom to do what feels right for me, and not what someone else might want.
• In being true to myself, honouring my boundaries in my friendships and not trying to please others, I eventually met the people who love and accept me as I truly am.
• It took a long time for me to apply these lessons to my relationships with men, but when I did, I finally became a self-respecting woman and attracted men who also respected me.
• Honouring my boundaries with my current boyfriend often carried a risk of disappointing him or losing the relationship, but doing so created the foundation of our healthy and evolving relationship, in which we are each responsible for our part of the whole.

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Book reference: 

Getting to “I Do”, by Patricia Allen, Sandra Harmon

If you resonate with this episode, or have any questions, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Love Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I share the crucial lessons I needed to learn whilst being single. This is another very intimate episode where I divulge the ways in which I used men for validation, the discovery of my attachment system, and how finally deciding to honour my boundaries was the most important lesson of all. Being single and in search of love was very challenging at times, but as always, all worth it in the end.

Episode breakdown:

• After my 6 year relationship, I wanted to prove that I was attractive and desirable to men.
• Sex for me was about validation and pleasing men, not about intimacy or pleasure. For years I neglected my own boundaries and hurt myself in the process.
• When I decided I wanted to be in a relationship again, it wasn’t so easy. There were many important lessons I had to learn.
• I took responsibility for the resentment and mistrust that I had developed towards men and began honouring divine masculinity and the unique gifts men have to offer.
• I discovered I had “anxious attachment style” and took responsibility for my healing.
• I abandoned dating apps and stopped trying to control when and how I might meet someone. I chose to fully trust that my Higher Power would lead me to the right person at the right time.
• I stopped “chasing” after men and rebuilt my self-trust by honouring my boundaries.
• I became a feminine (energy) woman who respected herself and didn’t need validation from men.
• I stopped waiting for the “perfect” man and decided that a man who loves, respects and cherishes me, and most importantly, wants to be in a relationship with me, is enough.

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Book references: 

The Queen's Code, by Alison Armstrong

Keys to the Kingdom, by Alison Armstrong

Attached, by Amir Levine & Rachel S.F. Heller

Getting to “I Do”, by Patricia Allen & Sandra Harmon

If you resonate with this episode, or have any questions, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Love Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode I share what happened when I began letting my heart and intuition guide my decision making… 

Episode breakdown:

• I used to make decisions based on rational, logical thinking. I had stopped listening to my intuition a long time ago.
• After I hit my personal rock bottom and entered 12 Step recovery, I embarked on a new journey of deep healing and began to “awaken” to the present moment.
• In recovery, the voice of my intuition grew louder and I noticed that my mind was afraid of following its guidance.
• Acknowledging that my mind’s best ideas had gotten me to a miserable point in my life, I decided to try listening to my intuition, letting my heart lead the way.
• Paulo Coelho’s novel “The Alchemist” resonated very deeply with me. I embarked on a new adventure, no longer letting my fears hold me back from discovering my heart’s true desires.
• I moved to the other side of the world, without a plan, and without expectations. There I found the home I never knew I was missing, and in time I found my true soulmates. 
• My mind could never have envisioned the life that I live today. My heart knew the path all along. I am so deeply grateful I was given the courage to follow my intuition.

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Book references: 

The Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle

The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho

If you resonate with this episode, or have any questions about my story or my recovery, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]

Love Josephine

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Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.