This Roman proverb haunted me a but, since it felt like I was physically yielding as my body became more and more weakened by my disease. Does this then make me not brave, but a coward? I broached this subject with my social worker in hospice, and our discussion was surprising, and gave me a different perspective on this subject.

I recently asked myself a very discomforting question within my internal dialogue. But no matter how unpleasant it is, it must be answered - at some point. Here I try to identify the catalyst of when this decision must be made, yet sadly I have no clear concrete options or their associative outcomes. Harumph!

Ever ask yourself, why do we have to get old and die anyway? Why can't we just live forever? Some species on Earth do! So why not humans?

Well, in this special armchair science episode, I explore exactly why we MUST get old and die. And the answer sure rubbed my individualistic idealism the wrong way!

I approached the topic of what it is like to be dying in the very first days of my podcast. Years have passed since then, thanks to my particular prognosis, age, and fitness, and now I want to revisit this very early topic again, since I have had much more silvering experience with this topic, sadly.

We always assume a great mind, intelligence or talent is something to celebrate. But, in my personal experience, and according to great minds of the past, isolation is guaranteed trip to isolation. But this, according to those same great minds of the past, is a gift and not a handicap. In this podcast I shall discuss this topic from my personal experience and perspective.

While today's podcast begins with a general health update, share my pity onto those who cannot learn from the wisdom from the past, as if they have had to learn to endure hardship for the first time ever. What a terrible form of self-sacrifice. While no two events can be exactly alike, it saddens me that soo many today take from such lessons so as to improve their own or another's lot.

While I have been away since my last podcast, it was not for anything pleasurable. Rather, it's been quite difficult. But alas, I'm still here, and in the course of this episode, I come to a clear epiphany that both explains my drive, and crystalizes a reason for me to hang on, if I can.

My Friday, the 10th, did not go as I expected. The sudden loss of a normal biological function has indicated severe worsening of my symptoms. The end may be neigh.

New indicia of my heart failing to provide appropriate psychological support. And I'm sorta ok with that.

An analysis of the Saturnalia and the subsequent Sol Invictus pagan holiday (the origin of Christmas), and its relation to my life and terminal, but still alive, status.