My Favourite Monster

So we thought we would rate as a pet three concurrent cat-like things, nyan. All three of these would do just fine at either a catgirl, cosplay or furry convention. Which is what a human in DnD typically feels they have joined whenever they walk into a tavern. Futhermore, nyan.

• Which cat is best cat? (trick question... all cats are best cat)
• Do cat-girls have ovipositors?!?
• What did Tabaxi ever to to 3e and 4e to make them so mad?
• Which of these three makes the best flat-mate?
• Why does George hate Cats the musical so much?
• Nyan?

Shownotes and stuff mentioned:

• Kenji Miyazawa's 1924 work, Suisenzuki no Yokka
• Edo cat art: Utagawa Kuniyoshi. During this period in Japanese history, it became illgal to depict courtesans or actors.  So artists got around that by presenting them as cat versions of real people! 

In this episode we evaluate the subterranean tentacle-worms, Graboids, from the iconic horror-comedy Tremors as a potential pet.

• Save on water with a dirt-moat for your evil lair?
• Is this really just a dirt-chicken?
• Need a rain of florescent orange entrails?
• Can those tentacles operate muppets?
• Tony has a few rants... because bad physics! Geology!! Gaaah.

So... Spelljammer is back! And with Boo’s Astral Menagerie it's high time we took at look at Boo's kin, the Giant Space Hamsters!

• Wait... the giant intergalactic hamster-wheel goes how fast?!?
• What sub-species is right for you? 
• Is cheek pouch bathing hygienic?
• Tyrannohamstersaurus rex... 
• The Hamster of Ill Omen... how many Tarrasques can it fit in it's cheek pouches?

In this episode we discover that dentists make good fertilizer, as we explore the pet potential of Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors... We even sing a little bit:

• Is looting a dungeon just salvage without a pirate hat?
• Why don't plant's have poop holes?
• Can you really be fired for feeding your boss to your potted plant?
• "Suddenly Seymour is standing beside me..." --> sneak attack!
• Who needs CGI when you have animatronic lips baby!

In this episode Tony tries to get the tin foil hat off George so he can convince her how wonderful their new Aboleth "pet" is. Honest, it's the pet, not us. We wouldn't lie to you, fellow human.

• Who needs rolled up newspapers when you have continent sized meteors and planetary self destruct buttons?
• Is Aboleth slime the biggest thing to hit the beauty industry since collagen?
• You really should take off that tin foil hat and move to a seaside community...
• What does the song "Underwater Love" by Smoke City have to do with this?
• What is a Veiled Master and why should we elect them immediately?

In an episode that rivals the Slaad one for pure chaos, we barely evaluate Star Trek's beloved intergalactic parasite, the Tribble as a pet:

• What noise does one make when it's bounced off Capn Kirk's head?
• Why does Kirk have a better makeup budget than the Klingons?
• Are Tribbles the answer for saving endangered marsupials?
• How do I get to be part of the next Tribble crafting session ? Honestly, sign me up.
  
  
  

In this episode we chill out with our sentient mood lighting and wonder at what is simultaneously the most inoffensive and potentially most destructive monster in D&D. A creature that was once an April fools day joke: the Flumph. We ask:

• How do I monetize my flumph on youtube and twitch?
• Do i need a furry wall in my flumph-room(tm)?
• How much "seeding" time-off does my flumph need to "share genetic material" (eww)?
• How do you lose your tentacle license?
• Does a buff flumph have swol tentacles and fully thiq pancake-head?
• What major global religion is secretly based on flumph worship?
• Why is a single flumph actually more dangerous than a village of mindflayers?

In this episode we evaluate the Anaconda(s) from the movie Anaconda. Well, to be honest mostly Tony rants at one of the worst snake movies of all time.

• How do I escape from a bad snake movie?
• Why does it FLY?
• Is a candy/rubber snake covered in a condom a realistic pet?
• Exactly how much plot armor does J.Lo and Ice Cube have?
• No. Not snek! Bad producer! You get the newspaper!

In this episode we debate pet merits of the iconic Gelatinous Cube.

• Can you push one through a ramen strainer?
• What happens if they get out into the open steppe?
• What's with D&D's weird approach to electricity?
• Is it bouncy or not?
• Is it a glorified bumper car, or just a dungeon roomba?
• Is it a delicacy when cooked? 
• What happens if you feed one jelly(jello) crystals, toilet candies or pine scented floor cleaner?

In this episode we rate Velociraptors (from Jurassic Park) for their pet potential. We ask all the pertinent questions:

• Can I have a slow-i-raptor?
• What happens if mine isn't a clever girl?
• Should I ensure my friends have a character arc?
• How do they fare in a fight with Australian wildlife?
• Can I pit-roast my pet?
• Do they understand American football?
• Do they make good companions for Rangers?