Episode 17 is the 4th part of the GROWTH MINDSET series.

Have you been thinking about doing something different, something new? For this week's episode, I offer to discuss how having a GROWTH MINDSET makes it possible for you to SPRING FORTH and DO SOMETHING NEW!

Ask yourself these questions. What area do you need to develop in your life today in order to do something new? Do you need to develop your creativity? Do you need more courage? Do you need to increase your commitment levels? Maybe you need a coach! (*wink-wink) 

One of the traits that successful and happy people have in common is that they escape the STUCK TRAP by taking risks and doing new things.  

Ten years from now, or maybe even 5 years from now, what will you wish you had done during THIS period of your life or your career? Now, what is the ONE thing you can do to take a step in the direction of doing that something new? Don't wait, go for it!  

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Episode 16 is the 3rd part of the GROWTH MINDSET series.

For this week's episode, I offer ways that you can flourish in your current condition, even if it is not your ideal situation.  

Strategy #1: Examine your character.

Our character is the aggregate of who we are; thoughts, feelings, and behaviors it's "what's inside every one of us." A great resource for discovering your strengths is the Character Strengths Survey. Take this survey, and once you've pinpointed your strengths, think about how you can use them to the best of your ability. This way you can spend less time dwelling on the things you don't like about yourself and more time living a fulfilling life by emphasizing the parts that you do like.

Strategy #2:  Be adaptable.

What makes us adaptable?  One primary way of becoming more adaptable is to improve your coping mechanism.  Your coping mechanism is what you usually think or how you usually react in the face of stress or trauma to help manage difficult emotions.  Many of us start whining or complaining as soon as we find ourselves in a difficult situation. Some of us lash out at others and blame them for our current situation.  Although it MAY be a normal reaction for most of us, it ultimately leads to nowhere. Learn to accept the situation, ADAPT to it and move on. 

Strategy #3: Be content.

Contentment is a state of satisfaction.  It means that you don't necessarily have to be in an ideal state or a perfect situation to experience fulfillment or happiness.  You can become content by practicing MINDFULNESS.   Mindfulness is about appreciating where you are without striving to change anything or make something happen. It's a state of mind in which you let go of the past, you don't worry about the future, you simply BE.  You allow yourself to rest in that moment.  It's the ultimate way to find contentment wherever you may be 

This episode can be summed up with the words of psychologist Carl Jung, "I am not what happened to me, I am what I CHOOSE to become."

 

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Episode 15 is the second of the 4-part series on A GROWTH MINDSET.

For this week's episode, I discuss RESILIENCE.  

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks.  It is also the ability to thrive, grow and be effective in the face of adversity, challenges and change.

People who have a growth mindset possess the trait of resilience.  Resilient people think differently. Resilience can be learned because resilience is primarily about how you think.

The interesting thing about resilience is this… EVERYBODY needs it.  Whether you are dealing with bad traffic, or a major challenge such as a negative health diagnosis, job loss, divorce or financial setback. You need resilience! Because you know what? Stress, challenges, and adversity are inevitable. 

As I said earlier, resilience is primarily about HOW you think! This is what psychologist call building your self-awareness.  And the best way of building self-awareness is by taking time to notice your thoughts. 

If you can be aware of your thoughts, you can change them and ultimately change your reactions to the challenges and adversity that comes your way. You do this by shifting your perspective. When you shift your perspective you stop irrational thinking, you reduce anxiety and increase productivity.

I want you to think of a recent situation that has caused you heightened stress, anxiety, and/or frustration.  Describe the who, what, when, and where of what happen.  NOT THE WHY. Just the who, what, when, and where. What were your thoughts during that moment? What was your reaction or response? Was your response healthy?  Did it bring you closer to your goal? Or was your response counteractive to your goal? If this event were to happen again, how would you modify your response? 

Remember,  your thoughts create reactions.  If you can be aware of your thoughts, you can change them and ultimately change your reactions to the challenges and adversity that comes your way.

BE RESILIENT!!!

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For this week's episode, I discuss the difference between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset.  I also offer three practices that you can implement to develop a growth mindset.

1. Let go of perfection!

Valorie Burton says fear uses perfection as an excuse for remaining stuck!  You see, perfection and procrastination are relatives.  We often procrastinate because we are not in the perfect situation or we may feel inadequate for the task at hand. 

What do you keep putting off because the circumstances aren't what YOU think they should be.  Give yourself permission to make mistakes, and to LEARN from those mistakes so you can move forward.

1. Be open to learning something new!

A fixed mindset literally switches us off to learning.  In contrast, the growth mindset means that you realize the importance of remaining open to new experiences and information. 

Have you been putting off learning a new skill or a new practice to help you especially one that will help you fulfill a goal?

1. Failure isn't final!Avoid the fixed mindset trap by learning to view failure as a temporary setback rather than regarding it as being all defining. People with a growth mindset still experience failure and disappointment, but don't allow setbacks to deter them from their goals.

Do you feel like you've failed at something recently? What did you learn about this temporary setback? How can you get back on track with your progress? 

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Episode 13 is the last of the 4-part series on LETTING GO.  For this week's episode, I discuss "Letting Go of Control" by offering you three strategies that you can implement to live a life that's simpler, healthier, and happier...  

1. Examine your own actions.  Do you have a tendency to micromanage? If so, What are some reasons behind your micromanagement? Do you not trust others to take responsibility of a specific task? What do you fear if you let go of controlling certain aspects of your relationships or career? Take a moment in your quiet space and time and answer these questions truthfully. I'm sure your answers will shed some light on what you really fear.
2. Spend more time focusing on the areas where you DO have control.  Remember earlier we discussed those areas, your health, attitude, your mental and emotional well-being?  What would your life look like if you devoted more time to your health, mental, and emotional well-being, instead of spending more time TRYING to control other people's behaviors and actions?  I'll tell you what will happen, you will become more productive and less stress. 
3. Learn to become more flexible.  Learning to adjust to life's circumstances beyond our control is a core trait of having a more enjoyable life. According to psychologist Dr. Sandra Sanger, When you need to have control, "you sacrifice flexibility and place a lower than necessary ceiling on your capacity for engaging in and enjoying life." In other words, people who have difficulty letting go of control oftentimes find themselves missing out on other enjoyable areas of their lives, because they are simply using time and energy engaging in areas in which they have no control.  

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This week's episode is the third of the 4-part series on LETTING GO. 

For this week's episode, I discuss "Letting Go of Toxic People." How do you know if you are in a relationship with a toxic person? Look for these three common traits:

1. Toxic people are manipulative. 
2. Toxic people rarely take responsibility for their own negative behavior. 
3. Toxic people are rarely supportive and interested in other people's goals and dreams.

After hearing the three common traits of toxic people, do you find yourself in some kind of relationship with a toxic person?  

Sometimes, letting go of toxic people means that you're actually letting go of their BEHAVIOR, not necessarily letting them go as human beings. Let's face it, there are people in our lives that we can't literally "let go" because of the role they have in our lives.  For many of us, it's a family member, a colleague, or co-worker.   Maybe you have toxic people in your lives that you just can't let them go, but you can let go of their toxic behavior.  You do this by setting healthy boundaries for yourself. 

In fact, setting healthy boundaries is the way of letting toxic people go.  Sometimes that means making the hard decision to distance yourself from those whose presence is more likely to keep you stuck than moving you forward. It may simply mean having a heart-to heart discussion about what's not working for you in your relationship or friendship.  It may even mean you taking ownership for accepting theis behavior and taking action to change YOUR role in the relationship or friendship. 

Remember… iron sharpens iron.  If you want to live a life of success and happiness, you need to make sure you become be the iron you want to attract.

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This week's episode is the second of the 4-part series on LETTING GO. 

For this week's episode, I discuss "Letting Go of Your Old Story" by offering you a template for rewriting your own story.  

First, give yourself the starring role, not as a victim, but as an overcomer.  Do not make the villains the centerpiece of your story. Next, choose a cast and crew.  Choose people who bring out the best in you.  Choose someone who stretches you and challenges you to do better.  Choose someone where service is reciprocated and is not one sided.  Finally, practice telling this story, first with yourself and then to others.    

In the words of Steve Maraboli: Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny. 

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What does your happiness have to do with success? Here's a fact: Research shows happiness causes success, not the other way around.

This week's episode is the first of the 4-part series on LETTING GO. 

For this week's episode, I discuss 3 common negative emotions - anger, fear, & guilt/shame and possible messages they send.  I then offer you questions of self-reflection so that you can take steps to move forward.

1. Negative Emotion: ANGER

Possible Message: Someone crossed your boundary.

Questions of Self-Reflection: What can I do to move on from my anger? What could I do differently to reduce the chance of this happening again?

2. Negative Emotion: FEAR

Possible Message: I may be focused more on the potential for a negative outcome than a positive outcome.

Questions of Self-Reflection: What if my fear came true? How would I overcome it?

3. Negative Emotion: GUILT and/or SHAME

Possible Messages: I have done something that is out of alignment with my values and beliefs. Or, I am allowing past actions or experiences to define who I am.

Questions of Self-Reflection: 

Do I need to seek forgiveness from others or myself? How can I ensure that I won't repeat this in the future?  What can I learn from this mistake or failure that will help me behave differently in the future?

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What does your happiness have to do with success? Here's a fact: Research shows happiness causes success, not the other way around.

This week's episode is the fourth of the 4-part series of LOVE AND HAPPINESS. I've entitled this podcast "Sustaining and Maintaining Your Happiness".

For this week's episode, I give you 5 practices

you should implement to KEEP your happiness.

1. Spend your resources on activities that produce positive emotions.You see, we gain the most happiness from experiences that create specific positive emotions:  joy, delight, contentment, peace, enthusiasm, curiosity, vitality, pride, interest, thrill, and even connection.
2. Don't become mundane and predictable in your happiness habits. This is why changing your circumstances (10%) is ineffective for sustainable happiness. By nature, we adapt to our routines, so we have to change even when our circumstances don't. 

1. Periodically tap into a social support system that will hold you accountable and support you towards your happiness goals. People with social support are even more likely to sustain happiness when they intentionally want to create more of it.
2. Make a commitment to take part in activities that make you a happier person.  You must commit to this goal of being happy for a long period of time, maybe even a lifetime.

#5. Repeat! Repeat these practices over and over again until they become second nature to you. When you repeatedly take conscious actions, you form habits. Habits form with repetition and practice until they become "habitual."  You don't even think about them, you just do them.  And that's the goal of sustainable happiness.

Assignment for this week: 1. Write down 3 blessings, or 3 areas of gratitude. 2. Perform a random act of kindness for someone. 3. Do something positive for yourself that makes you happy!

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The New Thinking New Power Podcast is a weekly chat with Dr. Paula, a certified life and executive coach in Atlanta, Georgia, where she discusses all things related to reconstructing your thoughts so you can attract success, happiness, and more importantly, the life you desire.

This week's episode is the third of a 4-part series of LOVE AND HAPPINESS.  I've entitled this podcast "Happy Habits".   What does your happiness have to do with success? Here's a fact: Research shows happiness causes success, not the other way around.    

For this week's episode, I give you 5 habits for developing authentic happiness.

 

Habit #1: Develop a habit of positive thinking.

What is a more optimistic way of looking at your current situation?

 

Habit #2: Develop healthy social connections. 

How connected do you feel to those who support you most?

 

Habit #3: Manage the negative occurrences. 

What do you need to do to relieve your stress and anxiety levels in a healthy way? 

Habit #4: Live in the moment. 

Do you take time to celebrate small milestones? 

Habit #5: Make attainable goals.

What is your most important goal currently?  What is one step you can make to get closer to this goal?   Assignment for this week: 1. Write down 3 blessings, or 3 areas of gratitude. 2. Perform a random act of kindness for someone. 3. Do something for yourself!   Resources Mentioned: Dr. Sonya Lyubomirsy http://sonjalyubomirsky.com/   Make sure you follow me on social media: Instagram: @drpaulacoach Facebook: @drpaulacoach