No Bad Ideas

Today on No Bad Ideas... Slapping! Hangovers! Sympathy magic! Operant conditioning! And more!

In today's first idea, Gabriel brings us the story of a man who was so addicted to Facebook that he had to hire someone to slap him every time he goes to the website. The team turns it into the story of a wealthy businessman who has to resort to extreme measures to keep himself productive and civil. Then, Sarah presents the story of a hangover-prevention item from ancient times. The squad works to turn it into the story of two archeologists who find their lives intertwined in some surprising (and very literal) ways. 

All of that, plus: vanilla millionaires, getting into coding at the exact right moment, fake dating as a productivity hack, a classist ring system, and adding a third genre for no reason. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™: 

Idea #1

Idea #2

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A trip back into the Bad Ideas Vault this week, as Sarah brings us a tale from the exotic world of art thievery, where everyone is super cool and sophisticated… everyone, that is, except for the thieves.

What will Gabriel and Zach make of an entire town in on a police sting operation? And how many explosions will it involve? There are definitely more twists than you think. Plus, roles definitely played by Jason Statham, agents of chaos in the background, a fistful of art historians, and revolutions which will not be monetized.

Today’s Bad Idea™: https://www.bbc.com/news/amp/world-europe-47568323

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Today on No Bad Ideas... Rumbles! Investigative reporters! Therapy lions! Community-building! And more!

After a slight breakdown in our production assembly line, we are back with the first of two new episodes this week! In our first bad idea, Sarah brings us the story of a bus that is designed to put its riders to sleep. Wacky hijinks ensue when the sleepy passengers awake to find themselves in the middle of a high-stakes movie they don't know they're in. Then, Gabriel brings the squad the story of three Spanish writers who pseudonymously created a successful female writer. The gang turns it into the story of three disgruntled film industry professionals who create a fake writer to make their dreams come true... and then have it completely spiral out of control. 

All of that, plus: eccentric demands, ways to artificially raise the stakes, you'll-never-work-in-this-town-again moments, new forms of identity theft, and things that feel like punching down. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™: 

Idea #1

Idea #2

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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Our apologies for the delay this week, but sometimes ideas just are so bad that it takes a little extra time to put them together. These may be the worst things we've ever pitched. 

First, Gabriel brings us a story from the Internet’s homeland for bad ideas, Reddit’s Am I The Asshole?, and we turn the tale of a critical boyfriend into a contained family drama even Edward Albee would fear. Then, Zach tells us about a new initiative by Austrian museums and we, somewhat against our will, turn it into the Dan Brown sequel that no one has asked for.

Plus: 3/10 handshakes, learning nothing from Tumblr, succumbing to the golden touch, an episode of Black Mirror as a person, and boundaries that could have been set earlier.

Today’s Bad Ideas™: 

Idea #1

Idea #2

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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Today on No Bad Ideas: Robots! Courtroom Dramas! Fake Marriages! Elaborate Hoaxes! And more!

For our first bad idea, Sarah brings us a marriage made in hell: robot dogs and guns. The gang does their best to contain their terror and revulsion long enough to put together the pitch for a prescient court room drama. Then, Zach brings us the story of a man who is having his friendship with a single co-worker mercilessly exploited. The team does their best to turn it into a charming romcom of deception and secrecy.

All of that, plus: successful yuppie vibes, jolts of caffeine, out of control marketing budgets, after-the-fact-movies, and marriage swaps. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™: 

Idea #1

Idea #2

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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Gabriel, Zach, and Sarah are taking a quick autumn break this week, but we didn't want to leave you without any No Bad Ideas this week! So check out this old favorite from our archives, featuring our friend Mark Pagán, producer of the podcast Other Men Need Help! 

We certainly could use a hand, as Gabriel issues us an idea about a very unconventional way to settle disputes, which leads to a mockumentary of a divorce for the (middle) ages. Then, Sarah shows us a question about one man's quest for a licensing deal that is so strange, we immediately cast Christian Bale.

Plus: 12 Techniques To Win Your Custody Battle In Three Moves Or Less, things that are Game of Thrones' fault, Paul Giamatti’s first Oscar, and the secret ingredient: friendship.

Today’s Bad Ideas:

Idea #1 

Idea #2 

If you want to follow Mark and his work, you can check out his site at http://www.markpagan.com/ or follow him on Twitter, as well as Other Men Need Help on their site or on Instagram. 

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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Zach is off this week, but we’re delighted to welcome a long time friend of the show for some mayhem at NBI HQ: we're lucky to have author extraordinaire Zoe Tokushige in the Bad Ideas Hot Seat! 

Things get heated with Gabriel’s first idea about a photographer who has a terrible time at a friend's wedding, which we turn into a Fellini movie from hell, with a weird ending that even European arthouses would be proud of. Then Sarah brings us a story of high-stakes, deeply weird negotiations between the Russian space authority and a Kazakh businessman, which we turn into the lowest-stakes treasure hunt we possibly can.

Then we talk to Zoe about her writing process, finding characters on the page, and the different between writing and other forms of creativity. 

Plus: Ships passing in the night, one star Yelp reviews, real-time descents, brief shining moments of potential, and Werner Herzog watching Cats. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™: 

Idea #1

Idea #2

If you’d like to check out more of Zoe’s work and get information on her upcoming novel, The Prankmaster General: New School Skirmish, you can find more on her website and follow her on Twitter. 

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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We have cracked the code on badness this week and/or we’ve just cracked.

First, Zach brings us a tale of woe from the world of cryptocurrencies and we turn it into a tale taking place during the actual age of piracy, because that’s somehow more grounded. Then Gabriel tells us about a business marketing strategy gone horribly wrong, and we craft a story about a man who's a little too weird to work but really vibes with his CEO. 

Plus: ironic hipsters, unnecessarily intense actors, the nuclear option, bargain deals that won’t bargain themselves, and only breaking the stupid laws. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™: 

Idea #1

Idea #2 

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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Today in No Bad Ideas: detached human brains! Frankenstein technology! Lotteries! Drug kingpins secretly living in your home!

In our first bad idea, Sarah presents the tale of a divorce that led to a heist of cryogenically frozen bodies... and then things started getting weird! The gang does their best to turn it into a thrilling heist story in a world where the über-rich guard their minds as closely as their bank vaults. Then, Gabriel brings us the tale of a government so desperate to get rid of the house formerly owned by a drug lord they are giving it away in a lottery. The squad turns it into a Fight Club-esque tale of the mild-mannered man who is led to the dark side by the criminal mastermind he finds living in his basement. 

All of that, plus: remote customer service, newfound confidence, common incessant thoughts, chess games of the mind, and lots and lots of 'tude. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™:

Idea #1

Idea #2

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

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Today on No Bad Ideas... Imprisonment! Dystopias! Literature! Very intense judges! And more!

In our first bad idea, Zach presents the horrific news story of an alternative to prison that may end up being even worse (and more exploitative) than jail-time. The gang tries to turn it into the story of an exploiter who is hoisted by his own exploitative petard. Then, Sarah brings us the story of a young ne'er-do-well who a judge attempts to rehabilitate by subjecting him to the greatest works of Western literature. The squad considers different ways to tell stories of enforced art-consumption making people better. 

All of that, plus: vandals with too much destructive energy, things that are entirely made up, empathy training programs, Dickensian poorhouses, super downers, and old, explosive fertilizer. 

Today’s Bad Ideas™:

Idea #1

Idea #2

Support the show: http://patreon.com/NoBadIdeas

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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