Not Allowed

Growing up in India, the most important conversations always happen in whispered tones behind closed doors. The moment you bring them into the living room, you get hit with the familiar script: we do not talk about that here. So I made an entire podcast dedicated to talking about it.

Welcome to Not Allowed.

This is an intimate, unfiltered space where we pull apart everything we are conditioned to sweep under the rug- gender politics, Bollywood tropes, covert patriarchy, relationship dynamics, and female autonomy.

For this first conversation, I sat down and broke down 5 questions sent in by all of you, completely anonymously.

If you have a story, a dilemma, or something you have been told to stay quiet about, send it in to @itsjanani on Instagram. Your identity stays completely anonymous, but the conversation will not.

- Follow for more - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/

- Send in your longer questions: https://tally.so/r/WOZ1zv

She fell in love with her best friend, flatmate, and confidant over three years and he likes her too, just not in the same way...

In this episode, I'm answering an AudaciTea submission from a listener going through one of the most quietly devastating situations: loving someone deeply, having that love somewhat reciprocated, and still having to say goodbye, maybe forever.

If you've ever loved someone you couldn't have, whether because of timing, circumstance, or distance, this episode is for you.

💬 Got a question? Submit it here: https://tally.so/r/WOZ1zv

📱 Follow along on Instagram @itsjanani for more.

We are the first generation of women who might actually stay single, not because we can't find love, but because we’re done settling. In this episode, I get into why modern women are choosing themselves over outdated gender roles, and how men still benefit from a version of patriarchy they’ve never had to question. From emotional unavailability to weaponized incompetence, I talk about how so many men are still operating from a playbook handed down by their dads, while we’ve had to rewrite ours from scratch. It’s not that we hate men... we just want them to catch up.

This one’s for the girls who feel like the bar is in hell, and the men who might just be ready to listen.

No one can dumb-b*tch harder than this bish. In my journey of dating in a more healthy way, I kinda sorta self sabotaged myself. Luckily I made it out with a slightly bruised ego but learn from my mistakes. If you like a guy, probably don't tell him at a SINGLES MIXER event that was CURATED for both of you to find other potential mates. It's like bringing sand to the beach. Dating is a meat market whether its on the apps or on the field. But I stand by asking for what you want, just a bit more strategically I guess.

Happy New Year! It's time to get focused and get ready for a new chapter for the podcast. Join me in my journey to disassemble the patriarchy, get educated, get less hostile and more communicative through this podcast. This year I want to not just talk about the topics we should be talking about but also build resources, have important takeaways and solutions or at the least, cultivate a support system. Expect more social commentary, more lewd jokes ( I will never stop making dirty jokes), laughter and lighthearted heaviness.

It's time to detox from toxic dating cycles. I really can't deal with the dating app culture anymore, it just leaves me feeling so empty and worthless. An endless cycle of situationships, half-getting to know someone, silently stalking them on social media for years just to avoid the feeling that you'll never find love - I am sick of it. There is so much more I want to do with my time and energy and so much that I've wasted on the idea of "happily ever after". Time to take it off the pedestal and call out the apps for how much they seem to be profiting off of our insecurities. I need a time out in 2025.

This is the story of a boy, a girl, goatees and really hard nipples. What better way to start Virgo season than spilling the tea on a Virgo boy and my cougar crush. I just had to get this story out there because this is the only way I turn lemons into juicy content. I do wanna say though, who's not an idiot at 24? I know I was. Fair warning however, don't date people who's prefrontal cortex still has some developing to do. Disclaimer: all people mentioned in this story who probably know who they are, I just wanna say - this is definitely not about you. Everything is purely coincidental.

I am back after a looong break and boy have I missed recording my ramblings. It has been a crazy two years filled with failure, heartbreak, loss of jobs, an ADHD diagnosis and turning 30 - basically still having no idea where my life is headed and no plan for it either. But I can't help but think of this as an opportunity to get back to the things I love and sharing my stories to make someone feel less alone but most importantly, help me make sense of this chaotic life and all that comes with it.

I hate to admit it, but it's good. Like indulging in a snack that's definitely not good for you, sex with toxic guys is like Mcdonalds at midnight. But it goes deeper than that. Wanting connection is in our nature as human beings, but insecurities are the tricky part of the equation that our animal instincts don't know how to configure. We are taught how to love and be loved, that plays a pivotal role in our sex lives. So when we learn that love is conditional or to be earned, we end up in toxic relationships with mind blowing sex. But are we doomed to be in the loop of toxic relationships? Will I be able to accept healthy relationships with love that is unconditional? And why is the perfect recipe for an orgasm, anxiety and attachment issues? 

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☼ Janani - https://www.instagram.com/itsjanani/

☼ Twitter - https://twitter.com/titsjanani