Not For Nothin'

This is the only time we'll try to mention Stranger Things on this pod. But honestly how has no-one tried to write an article describing or comparing how NBA Free Agency is like a season of Stranger Things? Although I'm sure The Ringer will have one up soon now... you're welcome? Obviously these two guys do talk about the latest crazy of free agency, reignite the dream of OKC back to Seattle (without Chris Paul of course) and then celebrate the dawn of robot...er, electronic umpires in baseball. Thank god for the Atlantic League. There's also a documentary recommendation from Chris that I'm sure Kris will never remember to watch.

This isn't really an emergency post-free agent frenzy podcast, but more a celebration of all things that are great with America right now in honor of this nations birthday. Things like, NBA free agency, Women's World Cup Soccer team, gambling in Pittsburgh with your interns and finding heroin on Cape Cod because your spending time with the in-laws. That really sums up the the whole show, so light up those sparklers, roman candles and snakes... and have the burn cream near by. U-S-A, U-S-A, U-S-A!

The real NBA season is about to start - Free Agency. So what better way for Heckle & Jeckle to crow on about it, than to bring in the only professional they know (and someone who actually knows what he's talking about), Mike Vorkunov of The Athletic. Not sure why he agreed to come back to the podcast (Chris must have some compromising pictures), but he agrees partake in a mini version of the Knicks lament, helps Chris through a little Sixers therapy session, before finally deciding that nobody knows what the hell is going to happen and we're all okay with it. Happy Independence day everyone! It might just be our last one ever (dun-dun-duuuuuun)...

The boys begin their long-distance relationship and hopefully they can make it work and not cheat on each other. While regaling us all with his first Pittsburgh story, Chris reveals he's already found a new drinking buddy...what a whore. They end up actually talking baseball as well. What the hell is going on with these two? In the end they go back to their first love, reviewing the NBA Draft. It feels like these two are spooning while talking about it right?

They start off hot and argue too many of the little plays NBA Finals game 5. Chris sees a conspiracy and thinks Kris is blinded by his love of the refs and the Raptors... Is dinophile a real thing? They do some bad gambling advice on the Finals, women's world cup, and the NHL. Chris does a bad Tony Dungy impression, gives a shout out to the passing of Dr. John for some reason, wonder what the hell is going on with this story of David Ortiz, appreciates the Swin Cash hiring in NOLA. They finish it up realizing they need to to follow up stories more.

Why talk about sports when you can debate the importance of Van Morrison, and wonder truthfully if his music is really any good. Spoiler alert, these two don't think so. They eventually move on to NBA Finals and why everyone(?) jumped off the Warriors bandwagon after the first game. They wrap things up with a little gambling and some WNBA talk. Apparently that's where the money is. Oh and Drake is the Van Morrison of the NBA Finals.

This is an Not For Nothin' After Dark episode. However it's not very sexy, and might make you sleepy. Speaking of which... let's talk about Drake. It's the only downside of the Raptors making the Finals. But they make the best of it and move forward talking NBA Finals and NBA Draft prospects. They even breakdown NBA media coverage. this is getting naughty. After that, their pillow talk is sexy accents from around the country. Try to keep it in your pants.

They boys, surprisingly, recap the NBA Draft Lottery and try to fix it, like they do everything else. They also get into some bad gambling ideas. Chris leans heavily in to golf betting, while Kris goes off the deep end, trying to figure out betting on Game of Thrones. They manage to find their way back out and talk Sixers & NBA Conference Finals.

This ones full of helium. No seriously they boys tackle the world helium crisis. spoiler alert... they don't solve it. But they may have fund out the truth why there is one. Other than that, it's 90's urban movie genre (is that what is called?), and a few call backs to previous show topics for Chris (little surprised he can actually remember what he's said), and might as well end it with some bad gambling and NBA Playoff talk. It's been a long week and Chris hasn't had drink in five days.

If you're big fans of the Kentucky Derby, this episode is not for you. Just don't listen. But also because it feels like these two are just half-assing it. But as far as Kris is concerned you can take your big hats, douchey blue blazers, fake-ass rich wannabes and your mint juleps and shove it all up your... well not the juleps, those are actually delicious. Eventually they talk about real sports, the NBA playoffs and thing pick up a bit, so what the hell, go ahead and still give this a listen.