Why is self-love the hardest love to give? You can hype your kids, cheer on your friends, support your partner… but when it comes to YOU? Suddenly the inner critic takes over.

In today's episode, I'm joined by intuitive empath and seven-time author Karen Blaine to break down what real self-love looks like—beyond the quotes, the memes, and the "just be kind to yourself" advice we all roll our eyes at.

We get into: • Why women (especially in midlife) struggle to give themselves the compassion they give everyone else • How being "too sensitive" can actually be your superpower • Practical tools to stop negative thought loops in their tracks • The grounding + gratitude practices you can start TODAY • And why self-love isn't a mood… it's a muscle you build

If you've ever felt stuck, unworthy, or like your own worst critic—this convo will help you shift the energy and finally show yourself the love you've been giving away for years.

PLUS: Karen answers the signature "Now What?" question… and shares a surprising update about what's coming next for her.

Enjoy! xoxo

melis

✨ Connect With Karen Blaine

Website: https://karenblaine.com Instagram: @karenblaineauthor Books on Amazon: Search "Karen Blaine"

✨ Connect With Me (Melis)

Website: https://motivatewithmelis.com Instagram: @motivatewithmelis Email: [email protected]

Episode Description

Today Melis is joined by Marie Crews—certified health & wellness coach, retreat facilitator, and bestselling author of Even When… She Rose—to talk about the healing power of journaling, her four-step Nautilus Way, and how she rebuilt her life after unimaginable loss.

In This Episode, We Explore: The Nautilus Way: Write Your Way Free

• Why you don't need to be a "writer" to journal

• The four steps of her method:

  • Reveal: Stream-of-consciousness writing

  • Review: Spotting pain points & patterns

  • Rewrite: Giving yourself permission, validation & compassion

  • Rewire: Practicing new thoughts and responses

Journaling Through Grief

• How writing supported Marie through the sudden loss of her mother

• Why she couldn't journal immediately after losing her son—and what happened when she finally could

Loss, Healing & Self-Compassion

• Acceptance vs. "giving someone a pass"

• Why staying stuck is often more painful than starting to heal

Retreats for Moms Who Have Lost a Child

• Marie's Gulf-front retreat space in Navarre Beach, Florida

• Why grieving mothers need a room of women who truly get it

Connect with Marie Crews

• Website: www.mariecrews.com

  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/marieeurecrews

  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@empowermentandgriefguide

• Book: Even When… She Rose

Connect with Melis

• Website: motivatewithmelis.com

• Email: [email protected]

• IG/TikTok/Facebook: @motivatewithmelis

Hoops & Glossers… grab your gloss and maybe a fan — because this one's spicy. 🌶️

In Part 2 of The Midlife Flame, Melis and Aimee Ames turn up the heat and get real about physical intimacy, body confidence, and what happens when you decide midlife doesn't have to mean "meh."

Aimee opens up about her Somatica coaching practice — yes, including the now-famous "throw me against the wall" exercise — and how learning new ways to connect can reignite passion in long-term relationships. They talk about shame, kink, curiosity, and the beauty of being fully seen (clothes on or off).

If Part 1 was therapy, this is your permission slip to get bold, curious, and maybe a little wild.

In this episode, we talk about: 🔥 Why desire shifts in midlife (and how to find it again) 💋 The power of Somatica work — fully clothed, deeply connected 💫 The link between body confidence, pleasure, and trust 🖤 How kink and BDSM can actually be healing and nurturing ✨ Inside The Rekindle Program: retreats, group calls, and relationship rebrands 💥 Why it's time to invest in your love life — not a lawyer

Aimee's new Rekindle Program for couples launches this month, and it's all about helping midlife couples rebuild emotional attunement, intimacy, and fun — together.

xoxo

melis

Connect with Aimee:

• Rekindle Program Info & Application → www.aimeeames.com

• Podcast → There She Is (on Apple & Spotify)

• Instagram → @aimeeamescoaching

Connect with Melissa:

• Website → motivatewithmelis.com

• Instagram → @motivatewithmelis

• Email → [email protected]

Hoops & Glossers, this one's a must-listen. 💋

In this first half of The Midlife Flame series, Melis sits down with Aimee Ames — a Somatica-trained Sex & Relationship Coach, Breathwork Facilitator, Functional Nutritional Therapy Practitioner, and host of the There She Is podcast — to unpack what actually happens in long-term relationships once midlife hits.

They dive into everything from perimenopause and the emotional load of motherhood to that weird "parallel lives" phase where you realize you and your partner are running the household but forgetting to actually connect.

It's real, hilarious, and surprisingly hopeful. If you've ever wondered whether your relationship is stuck… it might just need a rekindling.

In this episode, we talk about: 🔥 Why so many couples start feeling disconnected in midlife 🧠 How hormones and perimenopause actually affect relationships ❤️ The myth that you're "broken" if your marriage feels off 🔥 The "embers" metaphor that will change how you see your relationship

Make sure to come back next week for Part 2, when we get into physical intimacy, desire, kink, and what actually happens in a Somatica coaching session. Trust me… it gets good. 😉

And remember, midlife doesn't have to be a crisis-it can be your identity rebrand!

xoxo

melis

Connect with Aimee:

• Rekindle Program Info & Application → www.aimeeames.com

• Podcast → There She Is (on Apple & Spotify)

• Instagram → @aimeeamescoaching

Connect with Melis:

• Website → motivatewithmelis.com

• Instagram → @motivatewithmelis

• Email → [email protected]

The quick "why listen"

When your old playbook for success stops working, Johanna Danaher helps you write a new one. She's the Founder & Chief Energy Officer of Anchor to Aspire and a former global HR leader at Pfizer. Using Energy Leadership (ELI), Positive Intelligence, HBDI, and happiness science, she coaches mid-life, mid-career pros (hi, that's us) through pivots—so you stop reacting on autopilot and start choosing your response, your energy, and your next chapter.

What you'll learn

• "Have to" → "Choose to": a tiny language shift that unlocks better decisions.

• Transferable brilliance: how to turn "I've been out of the game" into real, marketable value.

• GAIL (Gremlin, Assumption, Interpretation, Limiting belief): the 4 mental blocks to spot—and what to say back.

• How to measure impact when your strengths aren't "numbers on a dashboard."

• Protecting your energy with tricky bosses… and at holiday dinners. 😅

Links & goodies

• Johanna's site: AnchorToAspire.com (ELI info + free webinars)

• LinkedIn: Johanna Danaher

• Book an ELI debrief/coaching: via her site contact

• "When we understand what influences our energy, we stop operating on autopilot—and become limitless." - Johanna Danaher

Share-love + subscribe

If this gave you an "aha," share with a friend who's in a pivot and tap ★★★★★ on Apple & Spotify so more midlife women find us.

Host: Melissa "Melis" Murphy • https://motivatewithmelis.com • IG: @motivatewithmelis • [email protected]

Cause Midlife doesn't have to be a crisis...it's a time for your REMIX!

xoxo

melis

🥂 (#46) HAPPY 1st Bday, "Now What?!" — A Birthday Bash with OG guest + college bestie, Kelly Huber

Hoops & Glossers… grab your gloss, pour something bubbly (sparkling water totally counts 🥂), and join the celebration — because Now What?! just turned ONE!

And what's a birthday without your bestie? 🎉 This week, I'm celebrating with my college bestie and OG podcast guest, Kelly Huber — the woman behind the legendary quote: "Don't just be a rad mom… be a rad woman." 🙌

This isn't an interview — it's a catch-up between two lifelong friends. We're recapping the year, laughing about midlife mayhem, talking Lexapro and rebrands, and setting goals for what's next. Think of it as friendship therapy with a mic on. 💬

It's funny, honest, and a reminder that the best part of growing through midlife is doing it together. My hope? That this episode inspires you to reach out to your own bestie — catch up, dream big, and hype each other up for what's coming next.

Because women supporting women is the real glow-up. ✨

In this episode:

💞 The magic of midlife friendship & supporting each other's goals 💊 Real talk on Lexapro, hormones & emotional resets 📚 Kelly's next chapter: yoga, pickleball & purpose 🎙️ Highlights and lessons from a year of Now What?! 🎯 How to set fun, meaningful goals with your girlfriends

So plug in, laugh with us, and celebrate this wild, wonderful, one-year ride. Because midlife's weird — but it's way more fun with friends who remind you who you are and where you're headed. 🧡

Midlife isn't a crisis - it's your REBRAND!

xoxo

melis

Listen now on Apple Podcasts + Spotify 🎧 Apple Podcasts 🎧 Spotify

Connect with Melis: 🌐 motivatewithmelis.com 📩 [email protected] 📱 @motivatewithmelis

Connect with Kelly Huber: 📸 Instagram: @kellyhuber721

💋 Hoops & Glossers… it's REBRAND TIME!

Melis is doing it too — sparkly bikini, big dreams, and zero apologies — and this is your sign to join her. This isn't about starting over; it's about unleashing the next you — the louder, freer, more confident version that's been waiting to take the mic.

🎙 Episode Vibe:

If you've been feeling stuck, stale, or like your spark dimmed somewhere between carpools and career changes — this one's your pep talk. Melis gets real about her own "midlife rebrand" (yes, including the spray tan and clear heels 😅) and walks you through how to relaunch you — body, mindset, and energy — with humor, grit, and gloss.

💥 What You'll Hear:

• How to stop saying "I'm too old for that" (you're not)

• Why fear is a compass, not a stop sign

• The truth about consistency, boundaries, and messy progress

• The secret sauce of every glow-up: community

• And the exact steps to kick off your midlife rebrand — Melis-style

🔥 The Midlife Rebrand Playbook

1️⃣ Audit Your Old Brand: Which labels, roles, or excuses don't fit anymore? (Retire them with love 💅) 2️⃣ Pick Your Color Palette: Life is not meant to be beige. Let's bring back bold. 3️⃣ Announce the Launch: Start living and speaking like your next-level self. 4️⃣ Find Your Hype Squad: Surround yourself with women who clap when you win (or DM Melis and she'll coach you there 💪).

🎁 The Challenge + Giveaway

Send this episode to 5 girlfriends who need a reminder that midlife is their magic era. Tag @motivatewithmelis on IG and you'll be entered to win a $25 Starbucks gift card ☕ (because coffee = confidence).

💫 Ready to Rebrand IRL?

Melis can help you do it — through food, movement, mindset, and a plan that actually fits your real life.

• The Reset Session → Lifestyle support for hormone shifts & energy resets

• DM "RESET" on Instagram: @motivatewithmelis

• Or email [email protected]

• Visit motivatewithmelis.com

💭 "You're not the same woman you were at 30 — and that's your superpower. Midlife isn't a crisis. It's your rebrand."

Listen on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify Follow: @motivatewithmelis Email: [email protected]

Hoops & Glossers,

👀 What if hot flashes, brain fog, and memory loss could start reversing in 7 days—no meds? That's what Sarah Lynn Wayne did with her Peri PEACE Protocol—a body • mind • spirit reset that turns peri chaos into calm.

You'll hear:

💥 Sarah's 7-day turnaround (hot flashes ↓, memory ↑) 🧘 Why a regulated nervous system makes change stick 🥩🥦 How to tune into your body (no one-size-fits-all) 📝 The 4-step PEACE Protocol: Presence • Exchange beliefs • Attune/Purify • Calm • Envision ✨

Quotes:

🔑 "Your symptoms are data, not destiny." 💡 "Don't fear your body—let it guide you."

Connect with Sarah:

🌐 sarahlynnwayne.com 🎥 Start here → sarahlynnwayne.com/assessment

Connect with Melis:

🌐 https://motivatewithmelis.com 📩 [email protected] 📸 IG: @motivatewithmelis

🎧 Listen on Apple Podcasts + Spotify Hoops & Glossers—let's get your sparkle back. ✨💃🔥

Because midlife isn't a crisis—it's a plot twist. And with the right tools, you don't just survive it… you thrive.

xoxo

melis

👉 Don't forget to leave a 5-star review on Apple or Spotify (because you're THE BEST!) 👉 Tag me @motivatewithmelis and share with a friend

✨ What if your birthday could be the reset button you've been waiting for in midlife?

If you've ever looked in the mirror and thought, I don't even recognize this woman anymore — this episode is your permission slip to stop dreading birthdays and start celebrating them. My guest, Tamar Hurwitz Fleming, author of How to Have a Happy Birthday, shares why birthdays are our most spiritually powerful day of the year and how to:

🎂 Break old patterns of disappointment 🎂 Ask for what you want without guilt 🎂 Stop birthday sabotage (yes, even the "mystery illness" kind) 🎂 Celebrate aging with courage instead of fear

It's time to reclaim birthdays as an excuse to honor yourself, laugh a little louder, and take up space — because you deserve it.

xoxo

melis

📍 Listen now, share with a friend, and then go buy yourself the cake you actually want. 🎂💃

✨ Connect with Tamar Hurwitz Fleming 📚 How to Have a Happy Birthday — wherever books are sold 📘 How to Have a Happy Birthday Workbook — exclusively on Amazon 🌐 howtohaveahappybirthday.com

✨ Connect with me 📧 info@motivatewithmelis 📲 IG: @motivatewithmelis

🎧 Listen to Now What?! on:

• Apple Podcasts

• Spotify

Hoops & Glossers,

It's our anniversary pod! 🎉 Papi's back—and yes, his microphone decided to go on sabbatical. Consider this your official disclaimer: I did not turn him down on purpose (tempting, but no). You can still hear him—and he is witty, even when he's whispery.

In this episode, we talk about:

• The truth about "24 long years" (said with love… and eye rolls).

• Why marriage is more blooper reel than montage—and why that's normal.

• Raising kids → living parallel lives → finding our way back (hi therapy, we love you).

• Grief & real life: losing our sweet Roxy and helping Toby (our golden) through it.

• Big goals in midlife: Melis' first bodybuilding competition (Mexico, Dec 6) and what that's really been like for both of us.

• Recreating "us" in the empty-nest era: new roles, new rhythms, and saying yes to walks (Papi… put the phone down 😜).

Real Talk Takeaways

• Marriage is work—not punishment. It's reps. Some days feel heavy; some feel hilarious.

• Therapy helps. Shoutout to Rupa for keeping it neutral and helping us actually listen.

• Midlife reinvention is for both partners. Women and men lose and rebuild roles; make space for each other's "what now?"

Community Qs (tell us in reviews/IG!)

1. Puppy poll: Should Toby get a sister or a brother golden?

2. Mic magic: Best budget-friendly couple-podcast mic recs? (Because… yeah.)

3. Empty-nest rituals: What weekly "we" ritual brought you back together?

Melis' Reset Offer

Feeling blah at 2pm? Want simple food + movement tweaks that actually fit real life? DM me "RESET"—I'm taking new clients and would love to help you feel your best.

Quick Disclaimer

Papi's mic dips in and out (happy anniversary to us 🎧). Stick with it—his quiet one-liners still land.

Share the Love

If this episode made you feel seen (or made you snort-laugh), share it with your person or your bestie who's in the thick of it. Rate & review so more midlife humans find our unfiltered corner of the internet.

xoxo

melis