America doesn’t have an anger problem. We have a contempt problem.

In this episode of Office Hours, I talk about how we can bring more love and happiness into a world that feels increasingly bitter and divided. Too often, contempt fills the space where love could exist. When we choose to love those who disagree with us, we not only make the world better, but we also make our own lives happier.

A lot of what I share today draws from my book Love Your Enemies: How Decent People Can Save America from the Culture of Contempt (2019). I reflect on what I’ve learned about standing up for those we oppose, and why real change starts when we take contempt personally. I hope you walk away from this episode remembering that behind every cruel remark or dehumanizing label is a person with inherent worth and dignity.

In the episode, I will also explore a psychological concept known as the Dark Triad—a trio of personality traits that can fuel conflict and polarization. If you're curious about how these traits show up in yourself or others, you can take a quick quiz at arthurbrooks.com/darktriads to see where you land.

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Newsletter: ⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(03:52) America’s growing crisis of contempt

(04:50) What motive attribution asymmetry is, and how to overcome it

(13:33) Why you should take hateful remarks personally and love your political enemies 

(18:59) Why anger isn’t the problem, but contempt is 

(24:23) How John Gottman identifies contempt in relationships doomed to fail

(26:01) How Dark Triad personalities thrive in a culture of contempt

(28:58) The neuroscience of habits and how they shape communication

(33:07) How to break a destructive habit

((42:09) Homework #1: Disagree better

(43:20) Homework #2: Stand up to your own side

(44:18) Homework #3: Go looking for contempt and meet it with love

(46:29) Homework #4: Express gratitude

(48:46) Q&A: How charisma connects to the dark triad

(50:10) Q&A: When family cuts you off (and why it’s more common than you think)

—

Referenced:

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• Love Your Enemies: How Decent People Can Save America from the Culture of Contempt: https://www.amazon.com/Love-Your-Enemies-America-Contempt/dp/0062883755 

• America’s Crisis of Civic Virtue: https://www.journalofdemocracy.org/articles/americas-crisis-of-civic-virtue/ 

• Motive attribution asymmetry for love vs. hate drives intractable conflict: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25331879/

• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

Are you managing your emotions, or are they managing you?

In this episode of Office Hours, I explore how to manage your emotions by understanding how they work and what they are trying to tell you. Emotions like fear, anger, joy, and disgust evolved to protect and guide us, yet in the modern world, they often become misaligned, leading us to overreact or lose perspective. The goal is not to eliminate emotions entirely, but to understand that they work for you, not the other way around.

To learn more about how you, specifically, experience positive and negative emotions, take the Positive and Negative Affect Schedule (PANAS) quiz here. 

In this episode, I cover:

• How to get out of your reptilian brain and engage your reasoning mind

• Why avoiding negative emotions can actually make you less happy

• The evolutionary advantage of rejection and how it protects you

• How politicians exploit the disgust reflex to divide people

• The “count to 30” rule for interrupting emotional impulses

• Three metacognitive techniques for managing emotions in everyday life

• A journaling exercise for reducing anxiety and building perspective

• A Q&A on faith, teaching happiness, and choosing fulfilling work

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Brought to you by:

• LMNT— A science-backed electrolyte drink mix that helps you feel and perform your best, without sugar, artificial ingredients, or gimmicks. Get a free sample pack at DrinkLMNT.com/Arthur 

• ⁠The Pump Club⁠—Finally, fitness you can trust. ⁠Join The Pump Club⁠—created by Arnold Schwarzenegger—for custom workouts and nutrition, habit building, and community—all for 50% OFF the monthly price with the code officehours at checkout http://thepumpclub.com/ ⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Newsletter: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(04:47) Feelings vs. emotions and a review of what happiness is 

(10:10) How Triune Brain Theory explains emotion and what makes humans unique 

(17:17) Why both positive and negative emotions are essential to our well-being

(18:40) The purpose and function of our primary negative emotions

(28:54) Understanding the primary positive emotions that drive joy and growth

(32:51) How to manage your emotions using metacognition techniques 

(36:35) Three ways to get better at metacognition, starting with Technique #1: Knowledge

(41:00) Technique #2: Contemplation 

(43:14) Technique #3: Documentation 

(50:15) Q&A #1: Is happiness or contentment possible through faith alone?

(52:50) Q&A #2: How to teach happiness without sounding preachy

(54:22) Q&A #3: How to choose a job that truly supports long-term happiness

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• PANAS quiz for gauging your level of emotionality: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/quiz/panas

• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

Learn more about your affect profile by taking the Positive and Negative Affect Schedule quiz (PANAS) here. 

So much of life depends not only on what we know, but also on what we know that others know as well. This shared awareness—what social scientists call common knowledge—explains how we cooperate, why markets rise and fall, and why silence in the face of cancel culture is so damaging.

In this episode of Office Hours, I’m joined by Dr. Steven Pinker, Harvard psychologist and bestselling author of The Language Instinct and Enlightenment Now. We discuss his new book, When Everyone Knows That Everyone Knows, and explore how common knowledge influences cooperation, politics, humor, and even happiness, and why using it as a gift, not a weapon, can help us all live better.

We cover:

• What common knowledge really is and why it matters in everyday life

• How nonverbal signals like eye contact or laughter shape our social lives

• Why so many Americans hide their true beliefs

• 4 principles that can help you live a happier, more meaningful life

• How to practice radical honesty with clarity and kindness

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Brought to you by:

• AGZ—AGZ is a nighttime drink designed to support restful, restorative sleep. Get a free frother with your purchase at drinkag1.com/arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠

—

Where to find Steven Pinker:

• Website: https://stevenpinker.com/  

• X: https://x.com/sapinker

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Stevenpinkerpage

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(05:04) What common knowledge means and why it’s tricky

(05:50) Evidence of common knowledge beyond humans 

(07:26) Nonverbal ways that we share common knowledge 

(08:08) Examples of how common knowledge spreads and is suppressed

(10:54) How dictators repress common knowledge through censorship 

(12:44) Politeness vs. kindness when it comes to common knowledge 

(14:55) The threat of cancel culture to academic freedom

(19:39) What happens when people are afraid to speak up

(23:04) Why we fall for misinformation 

(25:11) Arthur’s 4 big takeaways on common knowledge for wellbeing 

(29:02) The problem with collective illusion

(31:20) What the Populace survey reveals about how groups of Americans really feel

(33:39) Bridgewater Capital’s policy of radical honesty 

(36:15) How the 4 principles from Common Knowledge relate to happiness

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• The Language Instinct: How the Mind Creates Language: https://www.amazon.com/Language-Instinct-Creates-Perennial-Classics/dp/0061336467/ 

• The Better Angels of Our Nature: Why Violence Has Declined: https://www.amazon.com/Better-Angels-Our-Nature-Violence-ebook/dp/B0052REUW0

• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

Learn more about your affect profile by taking the Positive and Negative Affect Schedule quiz (PANAS) here, and download Arthur’s morning protocol guide to help you start your mornings happier.

—

Today, I want to talk about one of the lowest-hanging fruits for improving your well-being: exercise. Most Americans don’t get the recommended amount of physical activity, which means there’s an enormous opportunity to feel better. In this episode of Office Hours, I explain the science behind how exercise helps lower stress, anxiety, and negative mood, and how you can utilize it to improve your life.

I also cover: 

• Which kinds of exercise do the most to lift your mood and which calm stress the best 

• The stark reality of how few Americans meet even the basic exercise guidelines

• The 3 key brain chemicals exercise activates to improve your mood

• How to build an exercise habit that sticks

• How to define your emotional objective and build a routine around it

• The red flags that indicate exercise is tipping into addiction 

• Why a simple sunrise walk may be the most effective way to begin

• Listener questions on the effects of rituals on happiness, experiencing transcendence as a skeptic, and finding meaning in life

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Brought to you by:

• ⁠The Pump Club⁠—Finally, fitness you can trust. ⁠Join The Pump Club⁠—created by Arnold Schwarzenegger—for custom workouts and nutrition, habit building, and community—all for 50% OFF the monthly price with the code officehours at checkout.

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(04:32) How active are Americans

(06:14) The 4 core types of exercise

(08:50) How exercise boosts the brain through 3 key neurotrophic factors

(11:55) The unique mental benefits of aerobic exercise, yoga, weightlifting, and sports

(15:36) What the data shows about who experiences the strongest mood lift from working out

(19:00) Signs your exercise habit is tipping into behavioral addiction

(24:48) Step 1: Build a strong foundation with a basic exercise routine

(26:34) Step 2: Define your emotional objective and personalize your routine

(27:36) Step 3: Aim for high moderation 

(27:59) Why sunrise walks are an ideal entry point for new exercisers 

(30:34) Q&A: How do rituals play into improved happiness 

(31:48) Q&A: How to get the benefits of transcendence as a skeptic 

(33:20) Q&A: How to find the reason you’re alive

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• My 6-Step Morning Protocol for a Better Day: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/podcast/my-6-step-morning-protocol-for-a-better-day

• Physical Activity Among Adults Aged 18 and Over: United States, 2020: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db443.htm#section_1 

• Thomas Jefferson to Peter Carr, 19 August 1785: https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Jefferson/01-08-02-0319

• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

Want to make your own morning protocol? Download Arthur’s guide to help you get started: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/6-protocols

—

How you start your morning sets the tone for your whole day. In this episode of Office Hours, I share the science and habits behind my “Mad Scientist” morning routine, a six-step protocol I use to lower negative affect, boost positive mood, and make mornings a time of focus and flow.

I introduce the Positive and Negative Affect Schedule (PANAS), explain why morning mood matters, and show you the research-backed habits I use to improve mine. 

In this episode, I cover:

• Why your morning starts the night before with an early bedtime

• How witnessing the sunrise can help manage poor morning moods 

• The reason I don’t use the alarm clock on my phone 

• Why I exercise first thing

• How to build a grounding spiritual or reflective practice (even if you’re secular)

• Why delaying your morning coffee can improve focus and energy throughout the day

• The high-protein, tryptophan-rich foods I eat for breakfast 

• Why you need to protect your most productive hours of the day 

• Listener questions on staying compassionate while protecting yourself and whether anger is linked to unhappiness

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Brought to you by:

• AG1—Support whole body health around the clock. Get a free Welcome Kit, including a bottle of Vitamin D and 5 AG1 Travel Packs (a $76 value), when you subscribe.

• The Pump Club—Finally, fitness you can trust. Join The Pump Club—created by Arnold Schwarzenegger—for custom workouts and nutrition, habit building, and community—all for 50% OFF the monthly price with the code officehours at checkout.

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(03:02) Introduction to PANAS (Positive and Negative Affect Schedule)

(06:36) How to measure your emotional baseline and manage morning mood

(08:42) Step 1: Brahma Muhurta. The case for getting up before dawn

(13:46) Why your morning starts the night before

(14:52) Step 2: Get physical 

(17:54) Why morning exercise is Arthur’s go-to for managing negative affect

(21:27) Step 3: Get metaphysical

(26:50) Step 4: Coffee time. Why you should delay it 

(31:30) Step 5: Eat a tryptophan-rich, protein-heavy meal

(35:40) Step 6: Get into the flow 

(38:55) Q&A: How to stay compassionate while protecting yourself

(41:38) Q&A: Is there a direct link between anger and lack of happiness

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• Development and validation of brief measures of positive and negative affect: The PANAS scales: https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0022-3514.54.6.1063 

• Arthur’s PANAS quiz: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/quiz/panas

...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

Most people assume getting older means getting less happy. Maybe you’ve thought it too. But the research shows otherwise. In this episode of Office Hours, I’ll show you how your later years can be some of the happiest of your life and how to make that happen.

I’ll take you inside the Harvard Study of Adult Development, the world’s longest scientific study of happiness. I’ll explain why well-being follows a U-shaped curve and why, after midlife, your trajectory depends on the “investments” you’ve made. 

I’ll also share the seven habits you can start practicing today to build your own happiness portfolio so you can enjoy more satisfaction, purpose, and joy in the years to come.

In this episode, I cover:

• The biggest misconception people have about their happiness after 50

• Why life satisfaction bottoms out in midlife, then rebounds stronger than before

• The one bad habit most strongly linked to marriage dissolution 

• How learning to handle life’s inevitable setbacks pays off in your future well-being

• A case for expanding your mind, reading widely, questioning assumptions, and exploring unfamiliar ideas

• Why love is the strongest predictor of happiness in old age, and why one truly close connection can matter more than many casual ones

• Listener questions on happiness and age, if happiness is relative, and how to make the most out of a long commute

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(04:14) The typical trajectory of happiness

(09:34) How the Harvard Study splits people into two groups in old age

(15:03) Why uncontrollable factors don’t define your future

(15:54) How to take the reins despite your genetics

(17:23) The four most powerful habits for steering your wellness in old age

(28:13) Get good at coping 

(31:16) Be a lifelong learner 

(35:15) Invest in your relationships

(40:45) A summary of all 7 habits (and Arthur’s #8) 

(41:57) Q&A: How does what makes people happy vary across age groups?

(45:58) Q&A: Is happiness relative, or do people experience it differently?

(47:35) Q&A: How to stay happier during a long commute

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• The Harvard Study of Adult Development: https://www.adultdevelopmentstudy.org/

• Good genes are nice, but joy is better: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/

• Robert Waldinger’s website: https://www.robertwaldinger.com/

• The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness: https://www.amazon.com/Good-Life-Lessons-Scientific-Happiness/dp/198216669X

...References continued at: ⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

What can faith teach us about happiness that science alone cannot? In this episode of Office Hours, I sit down with my friend, the actor and writer Rainn Wilson. Best known as Dwight Schrute on The Office, Rainn is also a writer and thinker who explores spirituality in his book Soul Boom and on his podcast of the same name. Together, we explore the Baháʼí faith and the lessons it offers for living a more meaningful life.

Rainn shares his journey from growing up in the faith to losing his way during the height of fame, to rediscovering purpose through recovery and spiritual practice. 

In this episode, we explore:

• A case for studying religions beyond your own 

• A brief history of the Baha’i faith and the core tenets that continue to guide millions of followers

• How worship in the Baha’i faith goes far beyond prayer, reaching into art, service, and more

• Why you should learn to surrender to something bigger than yourself

• How fame left Rainn emptier than ever

• Why trying to avoid suffering is a big mistake

• What is the wisest path to happiness

• And more!

—

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• AG1—Support whole body health around the clock. Get a free Welcome Kit, including a bottle of Vitamin D and 5 AG1 Travel Packs (a $76 value), when you subscribe.

—

Where to find Rainn Wilson: 

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rainnwilson/

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rainnwilson/

• Newsletter: https://newsletter.soulboom.com/

• Podcast: https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/soulboom

• Website: https://www.soulboom.com/

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro: Why religion offers insights social science can’t

(08:50) Introducing Rainn Wilson and the Baháʼí faith

(12:05) What TV shows sparked Rainn’s spiritual imagination

(14:25) An overview of Rainn’s book, Soul Boom

(16:50) Why the character Dwight Schrute resonated with so many people

(18:35) What led Rainn’s father to the Baháʼí faith

(20:27) How Rainn’s childhood in the Baháʼí faith shaped him

(23:04) Rainn’s journey back to his faith

(23:46) A short history of the Baha’i faith and its core teachings

(28:27) Lesson #1: Surrender to the divine will

(34:05) How to practice “letting go” without a higher power

(36:38) Lesson #2: Embrace suffering as a path to growth

(42:51) Why Rainn is grateful for hardship

(47:11) What the four idols reveal about false sources of happiness

(58:12) Lesson #3: Anchor your life to ancient universals instead of trends

(1:02:46) Arthur’s four big takeaways

(1:04:20) Rainn’s new movie

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• Religion in Everyday Life: https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2016/04/12/religion-in-everyday-life/

• Cultivating Leadership and Happiness | Arthur Brooks and His Holiness the Dalai Lama: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZzAUgbfdecY

• Soul Boom: Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution: https://www.amazon.com/Soul-Boom-Need-Spiritual-Revolution-ebook/dp/B0B8YXJYGF

• Kung Fu: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068093/

• Star Trek: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0060028/

• What Rainn Wilson Knows About God: https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2023/05/divine-rainn-wilson-faith-moral-values/673891/

...References continued at: ⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsorship, email [email protected]

Have you ever felt anxious for no clear reason, like a vague alarm going off in your mind? You’re not alone. Anxiety has become one of the fastest-growing ailments in America, affecting more than 40 million adults. Rates among young people have doubled in the past decade, and the pandemic pushed them even higher.

In this episode of Office Hours, I’m tackling the epidemic of anxiety: what it is, why it’s on the rise, and how to work with it instead of against it. Using insights from psychology, evolutionary biology, and my own research, I share how anxiety can become not just manageable, but even leveraged as a performance enhancer. 

In this episode, I cover:

• The definition of anxiety as “unfocused fear” and how to recognize it in your own life

• Why anxiety has exploded among young adults and teens

• Why young women need to reduce their time spent on social media 

• How anxiety functions as an evolutionary alarm system designed to keep us alive

• Practical strategies for managing your anxiety that focus on presence rather than avoidance

• How the culture of pain elimination fueled the opioid crisis and what it teaches us about pain avoidance 

• Wisdom from Kierkegaard on turning your anxiety into performance-enhancing fuel

• If happiness and unhappiness can coexist

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening! 

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠

—

Timestamps:

(00:00) Intro

(03:30) A definition of anxiety 

(06:11) Statistics around the current anxiety epidemic 

(07:39) Do social media and screen time contribute to anxiety? 

(08:49) How to work with your anxiety

(12:13) Technique #1: The anxiety journal

(17:46) Technique #2: How NOT to treat it: Elimination

(28:26) Technique #3: Frame anxiety as an adventure 

(31:46) Does modern Western culture lean too much toward self-focus?

(33:01) How do you get better at happiness and unhappiness coexisting?

—

Referenced:

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• How to Worry Less and Be Happier: https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2024/01/worry-anxiety-management-happiness/677012/

• Anxiety: An Evolutionary Approach: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022395620309250?

• My Age of Anxiety: Fear, Hope, Dread, and the Search for Peace of Mind: https://www.amazon.com/My-Age-Anxiety-Dread-Search/dp/0307269876

• Trends in anxiety among adults in the United States, 2008–2018: Rapid increases among young adults: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022395620309250?via%3Dihub

• Global Prevalence of Depressive and Anxiety Symptoms in Children and Adolescents During COVID-19: A Meta-analysis: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022395620309250?via%3Dihub

• Teens are spending nearly 5 hours daily on social media. Here are the mental health outcomes: https://www.apa.org/monitor/2024/04/teen-social-use-mental-health

...References continued at: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠. Production provided by ⁠⁠www.thebluewave.net⁠⁠. For inquiries about sponsoring the podcast, email [email protected]

Have you ever had an abusive boss, a partner who gaslit you at every turn, or a friend who always seemed to bend the truth? You might have crossed paths with someone in the Dark Triad.

On this episode of Office Hours, I’m diving into a topic that doesn’t create happiness but often destroys it: the Dark Triad personality constellation. These are the people with three characteristics: narcissism (it’s all about them), Machiavellianism (they’re willing to hurt you), and psychopathy (they feel little empathy or remorse when they do).

Drawing on behavioral science research and evolutionary psychology, I explain what makes Dark Triads tick, how to recognize them before they hurt you, and why avoiding them is essential for your well-being. I also share what to look for instead—the Light Triad, people who trust others, believe in human dignity, and leave you feeling warm and uplifted in their presence.

I discuss:

• The core traits of the Dark Triad and how they drive destructive behavior

• Which careers and environments attract dark triads and how to spot the red flags

• How Machiavellianism shows up in politics (on both sides)

• The science of emophilia and why people who fall in love too fast are Dark Triad targets

• How Dark Triads thrive on social media (and the “first-date test” that can save you heartbreak)

• The telltale behaviors that reveal a Dark Triad in work, love, and online

• The defense tactic Dark Triads use when caught in a lie

• What the Light Triad looks like

• Audience Q&A on the connection between happiness and intelligence and how to comfort aging parents

You can take my Dark Triad quiz today to find out where you fall https://www.arthurbrooks.com/quiz/dark-triad-personality-test

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening! 

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠

• X: ⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠

• Instagram: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠

• Facebook: ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠

• YouTube: ⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠

• Email: ⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠

—

Timestamps

(00:00) Intro

(02:04) What is the Dark Triad personality type?

(06:09) How to take the Dark Triad test

(06:37) Why Dark Triads are more common than you think

(11:03) How to identify Dark Triad types

(15:24) The five things Dark Triads do in the workplace

(20:00) The five traits of Dark Triads in romantic relationships

(28:11) How the Dark Triad shows up in politics and activism

(32:11) Why social media is the perfect place for Dark Triads

(34:34) The nine red flags that reveal a Dark Triad

(37:05) DARVO: The defense Dark Triads use when caught

(38:38) The light triad: What to look for instead

(40:12) What’s the difference between joy and happiness?

(42:35) What’s the connection between intelligence and happiness? 

(44:22) How do I comfort my ailing and aging parents about their imminent death?

(46:30) Wrap up

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• The Dark Triad of personality: Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0092656602005056

• The Prince: https://www.amazon.com/Prince-Niccolo-Machiavelli/dp/1503017826

• Take the Dark Triad Quiz: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/quiz/dark-triad-personality-test

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠. Production provided by ⁠www.thebluewave.net⁠. For inquiries about sponsoring the podcast, email [email protected]

Welcome back to Office Hours with Arthur Brooks. In this episode, I turn to a place where many of us spend most of our waking hours: the workplace. Whether you’re an employee, a manager, or leading an organization, happiness at work is not just a nice-to-have; it is a proven driver of productivity, loyalty, and even company performance.

Drawing on research from Irrational Capital and insights from my book The Happiness Files, I share the six factors that truly make people happier at work, and explain why gimmicks and perks cannot compare.

I discuss: 

• The most important factor that drives happiness at work

• How direct, honest communication reduces fear and builds trust

• The surprising impact a manager’s mood has on team morale

• One of the easiest and fastest ways to boost happiness and productivity at work

• How investing in learning, mentorship, and growth creates lasting engagement

• Should you be making friends at work?

• The leadership styles that fail employees and the two that actually inspire loyalty and performance

• How much do your pay and perks directly impact your happiness?

 • Audience Q&A on knowing if there is a God, if your personality makes you more likely to be unhappy, and dealing with temptation

We’d love to hear any feedback you have. Please email us at [email protected]. And please leave a review on Apple or Spotify. Thanks for listening!

—

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 

• Website: ⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠

• X: ⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠

• Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠

• Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠

• YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠

• LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠

• Email: ⁠[email protected]⁠

—

Timestamps

(00:00) Intro

(04:46) A no-gimmicks approach to workplace happiness

(06:06) What research shows about happiness in the workplace

(12:20) Six factors that drive workplace happiness

(14:35) #1: Innovation: Openness to input and ideas 

(16:43) #2: Direct management: Clear, direct communication 

(20:08) #3: Organizational effectiveness: Focus on efficiency and limit meetings

(23:17) #4: Engagement: Invest in employee growth 

(26:40) #5: Emotional connection: Fostering a culture of friendship 

(31:36) #6: Organizational alignment: aligning external mission with company culture

(33:49) Intrinsic benefits vs. extrinsic benefits 

(35:20) Daniel Goleman’s 6 leadership styles 

(36:24) Four leadership styles to avoid

(38:53) The two most effective leadership styles

(40:00) A quick recap of the six factors that contribute to employee happiness the most

(41:58) How do you know there is a God? 

(44:30) Are you predisposed to lifelong unhappiness due to your personality?

(47:00) How to deal with temptation

—

Referenced:

• Leadership and Happiness course: https://www.hbs.edu/coursecatalog/1885.html

• How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/

• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN

• The 8 Stupidest Management Fads of All Time: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/the-8-stupidest-management-fads-of-all-time/

• Does Employee Happiness Have an Impact on Productivity?: https://pubsonline.informs.org/doi/10.1287/mnsc.2023.4766

• Happiness and Productivity: https://www.journals.uchicago.edu/doi/10.1086/681096

• J.P. Morgan Research: https://www.irrational.capital/jp-morgan-research

• Why Meetings Are Terrible for Happiness: https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/11/why-meetings-are-terrible-happiness/672144/

• Dear Manager, You’re Holding Too Many Meetings: https://hbr.org/2022/03/dear-manager-youre-holding-too-many-meetings

—

Production and marketing by ⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠. Production provided by www.thebluewave.net. For inquiries about sponsoring the podcast, email [email protected]