You’re in for a twofer! We are late to the publishing game of talking about Cruel World, so this is a download about Kite, Chelsea Wolf, Actors, Mareaux, Clan of Xymox, of course Nick Cave, the divisive topic of Garbage vs. Devo, the infamous wine-bra, and then some embarrassing feeling about Ministry. Apologies in advance that we do talk about the weather and food reviews, because unfortunately we are adults and as far as festivals go, Cruel World is a festival for adults. In the second half, we get into the sensitive topic of friendships, both inside and outside of the goth community, and how it feels and functions when friendships change or come to an end, and how this feels both similar and different from romantic relationships. Shoutout to Jack & Darrick for being excellent fake festival boyfriends, as well as to the Ziplock company for enabling Heather to become a wine mule (see the @open.graves.podcast for details).

Well, Open Graves is now a pop-psychology podcast. We revisit a topic from one of our earliest episodes: dating in the goth community, and how we handle it when it falls apart. This iteration is less about the goth community specifically, and more about the experience of being a person in community in general, attachment styles, family histories, feminist shame, and then the key words: abandonment wounds. Does healing require compartmentalization and avoidance, and what if we are unwilling or unable to take this route? What if we just want to pet all the feral cats? Jesus, growth is exhausting.

To commemorate Obelisk’s two year anniversary in March, we have assembled the team to download about the journey from day one to year two, which began with a power outage! Now that the infamous back room is opened, our little event seems suddenly to have sprung from a makeshift bar party to an actual club night, dancing on its own two fishnetted legs. We express some sappy gratitude toward each other and to our patrons and staff, and for the opportunity to do something that despite its darkness, has never and will never take itself too seriously. Next event: May 8th, Night of the Witch!

We are joined by the enthusiastic, self-described late-blooming goth Arkonn, who is totally not going through a midlife crisis. We learn about his not-goth partner of 21 years (100 years in gay time), the dichotomy of his sensible daywalking life, complex family dynamics and trauma, and how growing up Catholic and gay is essentially a recipe for goth. Find out how he rediscovered his long lost goth identity (with the help of Open Graves and Obelisk!), what our sexual totems are, what Arkonn has in common with Bill Clinton, and stay tuned to end on his beautiful and succinct description of his attraction to goth; possibly the best summation of this ineffable experience and subculture expressed on this podcast yet. 

In the early weeks after the election and Halloween, Heather and Vesta try to process these two disparate events. On brand as ever, we open with the darkness of the dystopia in the first half, and then claw toward recovery by downloading about Halloween in the second. How does the political climate affect an often escapist subculture? How does 2024 feel different from 2016? Do you put a political moratorium on family holidays? We close with a rundown of New Orleans on Halloween, and a cliffhanger about Mother Russia (rain down…or don’t).

Welcome to Open Graves After Midnight, in which we are still in Rocky’s house getting into the cliffhangers from part one (and some whiskey and wine). This includes a graphic encounter with Rozz Williams, empathy as a sleeper cell word, and The Other Gargoyle, aka the fraught origin of Rocky and Vesta’s now-cherished friendship. We also get further into Rocky’s meticulous passion as a DJ, his origin in radio, the significance of Twitch during the pandemic which essentially globalized the goth community, and a prophecy for future generations which may or may not include Olivia Rodrigo. Stay tuned to til the end to hear Rocky’s radio voice! Oh and despite the title, this episode does not actually feature Jay Byrd. 

Welcome to Open Graves After Dark with Rocky Slaughter, an alleged recovering goth who keeps getting pulled back in. We jump right into the darkness with discussion of growing up a feral latchkey child and loving it, family tragedy turning metalhead anger into goth depression, and a deep desire to be different from a young age, but once finding community, no longer feeling the need to perform this difference. We talk about his start DJing in 1998, being so goth he got girls by rolling around on the ground, storytelling through setlists, and making Vesta miserable at Bar Sin. Tune back in for part two in which we address the cliffhangers: Rozz Williams, empathy, and The Other Gargoyle.

We apologize for literally talking about the weather, but we are on the porch talking #summergoth and what this time of year means for us. Between kayaking, beach and lake bathing, and all of the goth pool parties, this time of year brings some behaviors that might seem incongruous with our usual identities. We talk about how we adapt (and don’t), how we are really not that different even though it looks different, and how the journey toward spooky season feels like its own often overlooked rite of passage. Happy Augtober. 

In our most literal Open Graves yet, we are recording a mini-sode in the cemetery. Heather and Vesta catch up after what we will politely call a hiatus, due to chaotic personal lives. Chill with us until we get kicked out of the cemetery. Please bear with some wind interference sounds around 8mins. As Heather cannot stop saying, smoke ‘em if you got ‘em. Smoke ‘em if you goth ‘em?

After a brief recap of Obelisk’s one year anniversary party, we are joined by fellow valley-goth DJ, Randy LeoDragon. He discusses wrangling goths for the film industry through the Bat Pack and being an ethical goth consultant to oblivious casting directors, he shares what songs he won’t play, and some basic human condition questions (like how do you load a TP roll?). You can find Randy DJing Studio 84 on even weeks and The Alternative (along with Heather!) on the odds, and hit up Lotus Events for your alt wedding needs! This episode is dedicated to the memory of Tim Sinn.