Optimism Vaccine

Instagram influencers keep telling us that “nature is healing” but the Optimism Vaccine crew remains skeptical. A lifetime of indoor activities has taught us that the natural world is out to get us. The only way to know for sure is to watch some movies that explain what really happens when nature is fed up with our bullshit. Will we all get enslaved by ants and attacked weird birds in Australia? Probably. Will online influencers switch gears and start posting pictures of them hugging cops? Definitely.

THIS WEEK: Monster Dog (1984), Phase IV (1974), Alligator (1980), and Long Weekend (1978)

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With the world crumbling all around us, you have to wonder: What will things look like after we wake up from this apocalyptic nightmare? Clearly the only way to find the answer is to watch post-apocalyptic films until our brains ooze out of their skulls.

THIS WEEK: Savage Dawn (1985), The Rover (2014), 2019: After the Fall of New York (1983) and Threads (1984)

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James Bond has been shot, beaten, tortured, and blown up but can he survive sharing the screen with Denise Richards as his Bond girl? Jake and Jack investigate the oft-maligned and frequently forgotten The World is Not Enough to find the answer.

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Whether your mother is an abusive old codger, a flesh-eating cannibal or a charming serial killer, we’re here to celebrate her valuable contributions to society. There’s no better way to say “thanks for letting me live in your basement, mom” than kicking back and watching some classic films that she probably has zero interest in.

THIS WEEK: Throw Momma From the Train (1987), Flesh-Eating Mothers (1988), Ed and His Dead Mother (1993), and Serial Mom (1994)

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All good things must come to an end and, thankfully, all terrible things do as well. As we finish off the 2020 Whoopathon, we must ask ourselves, was it worth it? Absolutely not. But, who knows? Maybe we’ll return to the Whoopiverse again once we recover, or maybe we’ve already reached the human limit for Whoopi Goldberg exposure.

THIS WEEK:

Fatal Beauty (1987)

Jumpin’ Jack Flash (1986)

Made in America (1993)

The Associate (1996)

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The Whoopathon marches on with four more films from the Whoopi Goldberg comedic canon. Have our prospects of finding a good Whoopi Goldberg film improved? No, not at all, but we are coming closer to at least one host having a mental breakdown.

THIS WEEK: Sister Act, Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit, Theodore Rex, and The Telephone

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As the global pandemic rages on, it has become necessary for one podcast to dissolve their sanity and do what no other podcast has ever attempted: Watch an obscene amount of Whoopi Goldberg films. Join us as we navigate the treacherous waters of Whoopi’s comedic acting career and gaze into the cinematic pit of despair.

First up: Burglar, Homer & Eddie, Bogus, and Eddie.

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What is a massive live event like WWE’s Wrestlemania, and professional wrestling in general, like without an audience? A little bit weird and occasionally great, it turns out. PLUS hear our thoughts on the new season of Dark Side of the Ring and pro tips for a baptism-by-fire approach to getting your non-wrestling friends into the sport of kings through the power of NEW JACK.

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With the rise of the Covid-19 Coronavirus, vast swathes of the world are faced with one, and only one, pressing issue: What should I watch? Thankfully, Optimism Vaccine is here with the cure…or maybe just a few recommendations and some films you shouldn’t bother with while you’re quarantined.

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The Pierce Brosnan era marches forward with James Bond taking on a media mogul hell bent on starting World War III. Does Tomorrow Never Dies deserve its reputation as a mediocre-at-best Bond film? That depends on how much you like motorcycle chases and Teri Hatcher.

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