Paleo Bites

(image source: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/the-other-pandas-thumb)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Simocyon, a creature that looks like a cougar and whose name says it’s a dog but is more closely related to red pandas. That’s a running joke on this show, I swear. “It looks like a baboon, eats like a llama, but its closest relatives are actually… cuttlefish.” From the Early Pliocene, this 7-foot carnivoran mammal is from a previously wide-ranging family of predators who all went extinct except for that little teddy bear who helps Chinese-Canadian girls go through puberty or something. I dunno, I only saw that film once. Just kidding, it’s my favorite movie of all time.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(Image source: https://www.science.org/content/article/one-ancient-human-relative-use-early-stone-tools)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Paranthropus, one of our ancestors’ relatives that didn’t fully make the transition into cavemen and died off before they could see what humanity would become. They were the lucky ones. From the Late Pliocene, this 4-foot-tall hominid used simple tools like sticks and rocks and plucked fruit off of trees and basically were just monkeying around. Sorry, that was low-hanging fruit… much like the ones they plucked off of trees… okay I’m done.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Ambulocetus)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Ambulocetus, a walking whale that might not have actually walked all that much, but boy it could swim! So a whale then, basically. A whale with feet. Ehhh. From the Late Eocene, this 10-foot cetacean swam through the rivers of Pakistan and chomped fish, crocodiles, small mammals, and whatever else dared get in its way. I bet I could take it though, personally. How hard could it be?

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Coahuilaceratops-pictures)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Coahuliaceratops, one of the few dinosaurs we have evidence of from Mexico due to something… explosive happening there at the end of the Cretaceous that wiped out most of the fossils. And no, it wasn’t the aftermath of a burrito dinner. From the Late Cretaceous, this 16-foot chasmosaurine ceratopsian had the longest horns of any member of its family, so that’s pretty cool. Probably to help it face off against the most terrifying predator in the region, Tyrannosaurus mex! Ugh, a fart joke and a regional joke that’s a bad pun. What the hell has this show come to?

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://sciifii.fandom.com/wiki/Coelurosauravus)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Coelurosauravus, the reptiles’ first of many, many attempts to get the hell off the ground and into the air. It seems like reptiles might be playing a geologic time scale level game of The Floor Is Lava. From the Late Permian, this 1-foot neodiapsid was unfortunately one of the losers of the Permian extinction event, where the whole world played a literal game of The Floor Is Lava and wiped out 95% of all life on the planet. Way to ruin a fun game by taking it seriously, Earth.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://bethzaiken.com/royal-saskatchewan-museum-prognathodon)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Prognathodon, a very unmerry creature that only has its episode released near Christmas due to the predetermined release schedule. Jingle bells! Chomp. From the Late Cretaceous, this 45-foot mosasaurid was smaller than its more famous cousin but had a far stronger bite, which means it could open presents real easily… yeah, I’m forcing this Christmas theme upon it. It doesn’t need it, it predates the birth of Christ! Which means, since he hadn’t died for our sins yet, Prognathodon and all other prehistoric animals are burning in Hell forever. Merry Christmas!

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/the-evolution-of-whales/)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Pakicetus, the very first cetacean and thus very first whale, so that’s neat I guess. Evolution and stuff. Intermediary fossils. Woo. From the Early Eocene, this 5-foot artiodactyl had many features of both land-dwelling and aquatic animals, which sounds indecisive if you ask me. Land or water, pick one! I mean, I suppose it eventually did. So that’s good I guess. Woo. I need to get paid more.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://a-dinosaur-a-day.com/post/185693540635/euryapteryx-curtus)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Don Hall discuss Euryapteryx, another one of those giant birds the Maori people had to deal with when they migrated to New Zealand. They had a rough time. The birds, not the people. From the Early Holocene, this 3-foot-tall ratite laid relatively giant eggs and was hunted to extinction by the humans. Because humans. We’re a blight upon the earth. COVID-19 was a nice try, nature, but maybe hit us a bit harder next time.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://novataxa.blogspot.com/2023/09/megamonodontium.html)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Megamonodontium, the most nope nope to have ever noped. A giant spider lunging in a hole in Australia? Nope, nope, nope. From the Late Miocene, this 2-inch spider trapped and ate giant dinosaurs and sunk its venomous fangs into the necks of cavemen… okay, not really, it more likely hunted insects and small vertebrates and was overall just another harmless animal, but nope I say! Nope! Nope.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Tropeognathus-pictures)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Tropeognathus, a genus split off from Ornithocheirus, well-known from that Walking with Dinosaurs episode where one of them was too old to get laid. From the Early Cretaceous, this 25-foot-wingspan pterosaur lived in Brazil alongside frugivore Tapejara, also depicted in that same episode where one of them got sprayed on by water too much to get laid. Quality television, that show, back when BBC programs took risks.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can purchase Matthew Donald's dinosaur book "Megazoic" on Amazon by clicking here, its sequel "Megazoic: The Primeval Power" by clicking here, its third installment "Megazoic: The Hunted Ones" by clicking here, or its final installment "Megazoic: An Era's End" by clicking here, as well as his non-dinosaur-related book "Teslanauts" by clicking here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.