Paragon Marathon

MOVIE NIGHT! Join Tom, Dan & Sarah as they saddle up alongside that bold renegade who carves a “Z” with his blade, a “Z” that stands for ZORRO. The pride of Wales is on parade with Catherine Zeta-Jones and Sir Anthony Hopkins supporting Antonio Banderas in the 1998 Action/Adventure classic, “The Mask of Zorro.” Picking up the legacy of the famed Fox and masked vigilante, this masterpiece of 90’s blockbusting-swashbucklery took a big swing at bringing Zorro into the modern age, and it still hits harder than a cart of gold bullion pushed off a cliff onto a keg of dynamite. Tune in for spicy duels and spicier dancing, a heated discussion on plot nitpicking, and a masterclass on villainy through discussion of the film’s only American character, the psychopathic Captain Love. Contained within: live-action anime and also the regular kind, celebrity whip skill rankings, horse comedy, and possible Schumacher vindication.

In a horror story, there are only victims and monsters. In a podcast about a video game about a horror story, there are only confused (but enthusiastic!) sibling hosts. Join Tom, Dan, and Sarah as the Marathon runs a long, spiralling loop-lap through Alan Wake 2 along with any and all connected universes. We like to call this next episode "The Story of the Journey of Alan Wake: THE MUSICAL!" But instead of talking, we'll SING IT! (We will also just talk about it.) True Crime fans, horor enthusiasts, and even you wretched gamers: Please join us for our most musical episode and least comprehensible discussion yet!

Contained within: amateur sing-alongs, Scandinavian self-inserts, author heroes, hero authors, anti-hero auteurs. Also Tom does a rap.

MOVIE NIGHT! Join Tom, Dan & Sarah as the Marathon takes a lap around Luc Besson's sci-fantasy epic, "The Fifth Element", a classic tale of good vs evil, sentient hell planets vs perfect day-old babes, and/or capitalist greed vs noble hobbit priests. Everyone's favourite tank-top wearing action hero, Bruce Willis, teams up with humanity's sexiest hope for survival Milla Jovovich in a whirlwind cyberpunk adventure, all of which pales in comparison to the immaculate perfection of Chris Tucker's radio-sex-DJ. Can our heroes survive the hordes of campy rubber suit monster mercenaries? Is any of this tits-forward romp socially acceptable anymore? Listen to find out! Contained within: Colin Hanks Beta-types, 90s fantasy eugenics, and Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel ZORG.

Join us on a wild ride through the 2000 classic, "How the Grinch Stole Christmas," (or in Tom's words "How the Cringe stole Milfmas") featuring Jim Carrey and directed by the mischievous Ron Howard.

Hop in the way way back machine with Paragon Marathon! This week, we're tackling the oldest story civilization has, The Epic of Gilgamesh. Join us to learn of the ancient king, He who saw the deep, revel in the wisdom and the super-jacked, bro'd up wrestlemania he found along the way. Contained within these clay-fired podcast-tablets; mythical sex marathons, copious cubit conundrums, and the self-actualizing contentment that comes from accepting your inevitable demise.

Get ready for a frightening vore-ay into Tom, Dan and Sarah's deepest fears! (Please do not use them against us). This episode, we point our shaking flashlights at the mysteries of darkness and the unknown, slither into the world of snakes, and dish on the fear of being eaten, bone-in or chewed.

Operation GOODBYE-HELLO-GOODBYE is a go: All Paragons report to Marathons.

MOVIE NIGHT! Join Tom, Dan & Sarah as they YIPPEE-WAHOO their way through the 1993 cult classic and misunderstood masterpiece, "Super Mario Bros." The inscrutable decisions of a string of troubled directors are put under the patented Marathon Microscope as the team discusses the exact kind of stuff you'd expect in a Mario movie: cyberpunk dystopias, fascist police, and copious amounts of (alleged) on-set drinking. Bob Hoskins and Jon Leguizuigi easily manage to steal our hearts, but can the indulgent dinosaur fantasy of the Koopa Kingdom hold up after a full thirty years? Contained within: why men are dogs, twink meat Luigizamo, and motorboat subterfuge. (YAHOO!)

Paragon Marathon is baguette it again. Join Tom, Dan and Sarah as they put the Marathon (and the Paragons?) back in the titular Para-Mara with a très grand exploration of Alexander Dumas' "The Three Musketeers." The adventure begins with a look into Dumas' background before Tom puts Dan and Sarah on trial with his French History quiz. Upon their escape from the Bastille of Ignorance, the group follows in the footsteps of D'Artagnan to unpack this modern take on Chivalric Romance and place it in the contextual frame of other texts they've examined (as well as the cultural frame of Late Revolutionary France, when it was first published). Contained within: cursed misophonia bits, supernatural Gascons, mortal and superficial stabbings, and a Fancy French Cat parade.

Image link for pic discussed at 46:27

MOVIE NIGHT! Join Tom, Dan & Sarah as they seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade in the 1993 sequel-masterpiece, "Addams Family Values!" Strap yourself in for a delightful exploration of 90s nostalgia, goth origins, and a criminally underrated satire of the conservative status quo. The marathon runs the well-trod path of Gomez and Morticia's unapologetically loving and enthusiastic partnership, (relationship goals? more like CREMATION-ship GHOULS) before getting into a serious examination of Cusacks on this week's "Cusack Corner." Contained within: Michael Jackson Mysteries, failed Nanaimo Magicians, and the Lost Sumerian Dog-Bar joke.