Here’s the thing: I rarely start anything properly prepared. I tend to leap into projects headfirst, full of enthusiasm and only mid-flight do I realize, “ah, maybe masking tape would’ve been smart.” But you know what? That works for me. I’ve finally made peace with the fact that I'm not the “dust sheets and checklists” type and I probably never will be.

So today, instead of trying to overhaul myself into someone I’m not (a pre-planning spreadsheet wizard, for instance), I’m celebrating the way I do things. Messy. Enthusiastic. Intuitive. Possibly with paint on the floor.

This is a little love note to self - and maybe to you too - reminding us that maybe the goal isn’t to change who we are, but to work with who we are. To channel all that energy we usually spend trying to fix or improve into doing more of what lights us up, in the way that actually fits us.

So today? No judgment. Just a quiet celebration of being gloriously, imperfectly ourselves.

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Yesterday, my accountability buddy told me I’d really changed - and I reckon she was right. My intention this year was to rest in my work (which doesn’t mean doing less, just doing it with less frantic energy). Apparently, it’s working. I hadn’t fully seen it in myself until she said it - funny how friends sometimes spot our growth before we do.

When we first met years ago, I was driving myself hard: late nights, weekends, juggling everything with an “I’ve got this” intensity. Now? I’ve been pulled out of my usual routine by life (as it does), and while things have been intense, I’m not panicking about work. I’m just… doing what I can. Gently. And that feels new.

Turns out, I've had two formal accountability buddies and about a dozen informal ones disguised as good friends. They’ve helped me shift from my “do it all now” approach to something a little more strategic and much, much kinder.

I’ve even (semi-regularly) adopted the “rocks and pebbles” method of planning - starting the day with what really matters, before email eats my soul. At the end of each day, I write tomorrow’s top tasks (“rocks”) and tuck the smaller stuff (“pebbles”) around them. Sometimes a pebble becomes a rock if I keep dodging it. Apparently procrastination has weight.

So here I am again, walking through a tree-lined avenue under a sky full of stars, slightly distracted by a tiny frog and the distant sound of trains - but mostly just feeling lucky. Lucky to be learning how to live and work a little more lightly. And lucky, too, to be witnessed in it.

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Welcome to episode two of my perambulatory ponderings—yes, I’ve finally figured out how to say it! I’m out walking again, wind in my hair (and possibly in your ears—sorry about that), reflecting on how easily we can delay doing the things that matter by waiting for the "right" conditions. Case in point: I bought a fluffy microphone to cut wind noise… but it doesn’t actually plug into my phone yet. Classic.

I almost postponed this walk because of that. But I promised myself I’d do this regularly, and even though life got in the way (in this case, a real family crisis, not just vague procrastination), I’m learning that flexibility is part of the practice. Crisis has a funny way of shrinking the things that once felt urgent and showing us what really matters.

I’ve also noticed that when I’m overwhelmed, I tend to go it alone - because apparently I’m hardwired to believe I need to sort everything out myself. But this week, I reached out during a staff meeting and was reminded: people want to help. And sometimes they ask exactly the right questions to help you find your way.

So here I am, fluffy mic-less but still walking, still sharing. I don’t quite know who I’m talking to yet (the marketing advice says I should), but it feels companionable. And that’s enough for now. Thanks for being here.

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This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe