How can parents set limits that actually stick in a high-tech world? And what rules to set? In this episode, the prominent screen time researcher, Jean Twenge, PhD discusses her new book, 10 Rules for Raising Kids in a High-Tech World.

Twenge explains the science behind how screens disrupt sleep, and shares ways to use parental controls effectively.

The conversation also explores delaying smartphones and social media, enforcing meaningful consequences, and why changing community norms, not just household rules, can make all the difference.

Expert

Jean Twenge, PhD

Book

10 Rules For Raising Kids In A High Tech World

Resources

www.screenfreesleep.org

Screenagers Website

Bring Screenagers to Your Community

Time Code

00:00 Introduction to Parenting in the Screen Age

00:19 Meet Jean Twenge: Expert on Generational Differences

00:52 Discussing '10 Rules for Raising Kids in a High Tech World'

02:00 The Importance of No Devices in the Bedroom

04:02 Parental Controls and Device Management

05:26 The Role of Lockboxes and Parental Controls

07:50 Challenges with Parental Control Software

13:11 Promoting Screen-Free Sleep and Community Efforts

14:02 The Impact of Disturbing Content on Kids

15:53 Balancing Busy Schedules and Sleep

18:04 Setting Rules and Consequences for Device Use

19:15 Delaying Smartphones and Social Media

21:35 Final Thoughts and Community Pledges

24:08 Conclusion and Resources

Frustrated with his obsession with video gaming, Cam Adair wrote a post about his struggles that went viral. This led to his starting a movement that has brought together thousands to work to create a balanced life at Gamequitters.com. Cam is an international speaker who shares his story about gaming addiction and offers well tested advice to youth and their parents.

Expert:

Cam Adair

Episode Resources:

Game Quitters

Game Quitters Parent Support Group

Afterschool Alliance

Additional Resources:

How to bring the Screenagers movies to your community

Screenagers Website

Time Code:

00:00 Introduction 00:38 Meet Cam Adair: From Gamer to Advocate 01:57 Cam's Personal Struggles with Gaming 06:42 Turning Point: Seeking Help and Recovery 09:48 Founding Game Quitters 11:11 Impact of COVID on Gaming Habits 13:37 Advice for Parents and Kids 22:15 Final Thoughts and Resources

Dr Ruston speaks with Amy Neville, mother of Alexander Neville who tragically died at age 14 after taking a fentanyl-laced pill he obtained through Snapchat. He thought he was buying an oxycontin but instead the pill was a pill laced with fentanyl.

Amy shares her journey from grief to activism, discussing her efforts to raise awareness about the dangers of social media-facilitated drug deals and her advocacy for stronger accountability from tech companies.

This episode offers insights into the vulnerabilities of teens in the digital world, the current drug crisis, and practical advice for parents on navigating these challenges with their children.

Episode Resources:

Alexander Neville Foundation

Additional Resources:

How to bring the Screenagers movies to your community

Screenagers Website

Time Code:

00:00 Introduction

00:23 The Tragic Story of Alexander Neville

01:30 Alex's Final Days

05:00 Turning Grief into Activism

06:46 Conversations with Teens

10:05 The Role of Snapchat

18:34 Advice for Parents

21:55 Resources and Conclusion

Many parents feel hypocritical or guilty about their own phone or tech use when their kids or teens are around.

In this episode, Dr. Ruston checks in with three parents who shared those feelings and took on the One Small Change Challenge to make a change in their own tech use. Hear from them about their successes and challenges during their two-week experiment.

Even for listeners who missed the previous two episodes, this installment stands alone and offers insights on how adults can model for their children the reasons and approaches behind making positive changes to their tech time.

Additional Resources

Boosting Bravery: Free Screenagers program for teens that includes DARTS.

How to bring the Screenagers movies to your community

Screenagers Website

Time Code:

00:00 Introduction

00:19 Recap of Previous Episodes and DARTS Framework

01:59 Hillary's Journey: Breaking the Social Media Habit

10:41 Lisa's Challenge: Keeping the Phone Out of the Bedroom

15:35 Tori's Attempt: Creating Phone-Free Time with Her Daughter

25:00 Conclusion and Resources for Screen Time Management

In our last episode, Dr. Delaney Ruston introduced the One Small Change Challenge and the DARTS model (Doable, Arrange for success, Reasons, Treats, Support) as she coached two moms on creating strategies to reach their phone-related small change targets.

This week, she talks with another mom, a certified parent coach who wants to stop using her phone before bed and keep it in her room overnight. You'll hear the specific strategies Lisa commits to.

In the next episode, you'll find out how it worked out for her and for the other moms from the previous episode. Listeners are encouraged to take on their own One Small Change Challenge and let their kids in on what they're aiming to do and the strategies they're using, and, most importantly, to ask their kids for support.

Change is not easy. If you're participating in the challenge, email Dr. Ruston at [email protected] and let her know how it's going.

Additional Resources

Boosting Bravery: Free Screenagers program for teens that includes DARTS.

How to bring the Screenagers movies to your community

Screenagers Website

Time Code

00:00 Introduction to Parenting in the Screen Age

00:21 Recap of the One Small Change Challenge

00:39 Introducing Lisa and Her Phone Habit

01:59 Lisa's Struggle with Phone Use at Night

06:38 Implementing the DARTS Method

07:59 Setting Goals and Arranging for Success

11:39 Reinforcement and Support Strategies

17:56 Conclusion and Next Steps

Do you ever catch yourself reaching for your phone when you don't really need or want to, and wonder what that shows your kids? In this episode, Screenagers creator Dr. Delaney Ruston talks with two moms who decide it's time to make a change.

They talk about the habits they want to shift and take on the One Small Change Challenge using a model called DARTS: Doable, Arrange for success, Reasons, Treats, and Support.

Follow along as Delaney walks Tory and Hillary through setting their own goals, and try using this model to set yours too. We'd love to hear if you do, so send a note to [email protected].

It's an honest look at what happens when parents face their own phone habits and try something new. In a future episode, we'll check in to see how their challenges went.

Additional Resources

Bring Screenagers to your community

Screenagers Website

Time Code

00:00 Introduction

01:25 The One Small Change Challenge

01:43 Introducing the DARTS Model

03:22 Meet Hillary: A Parent's Struggle with Phone Use

09:31 Setting Goals and Creating an Action Plan

16:58 Finding Support and Accountability

17:55 Engaging Family in the Journey

18:14 The Importance of Parental Vulnerability

21:07 Planning the Challenge

22:23 Tory's Struggle with Phone Use

26:24 Setting Goals with the DARTS Model

32:02 Creating a Support System

32:31 Conclusion and Call to Action

What kind of partner do you want to be someday? Do you think privacy is important in a relationship? What do you think pornography leaves out about real relationships? These are just a few of the unusual yet important questions boys are rarely asked.

In this episode, Dr. Delaney Ruston continues her conversation with educator Christopher Pepper and journalist Joanna Schroeder, co-authors of the new book Talk To Your Boys.

Together, they discuss how to help boys navigate gaming, romantic relationships, and pornography. They explore online sports betting ("the house always wins"), share ways to bring up sensitive topics like pornography, and highlight the particular role dads can play in guiding these conversations.

Featured Experts

Christopher Pepper

Joanna Schroeder‍

‍

Book

Talk To Your Boys: 16 Conversations to Help Tweens and Teens Grow Into Confident, Caring Young Men, by Christopher Pepper and Joanna Schroeder

Additional Resources

Stan Tatkin

Screenagers Website

Bring Screenagers to your community

Time Code

00:00 Breaking Stereotypes: The Importance of Talking to Boys

00:37 The Influence of Online Algorithms on Teenage Boys

01:22 The Allure and Risks of Sports Betting

04:16 Navigating Relationships and Sexuality

07:35 The Impact of Media on Perceptions of Sex

16:03 Addressing Pornography and Sexual Content

26:24 Encouraging Open Conversations and Emotional Awareness

28:06 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

How are today's boys absorbing messages about masculinity from violent media and games? How early does this begin, and what happens when gaming chats turn cruel or hostile?

Dr. Ruston talks with author-educator Christopher Pepper and journalist Joanna Schroeder, co-authors of the recently released book, Talk To Your Boys.

They share practical "interrupter" tools and relatable stories that help parents support boys as they encounter conflict through gaming, navigate their online lives, and grow into confident, caring young men.

Featured Experts

Christopher Pepper

Joanna Schroeder

Book

Talk To Your Boys: 16 Conversations to Help Tweens and Teens Grow Into Confident, Caring Young Men, by Christopher Pepper and Joanna Schroeder

Time Code

00:00 Introduction to Parenting in the Screen Age

00:19 Meet the Authors: Christopher Pepper and Joanna Schroeder

00:49 Connecting with Sons Through Technology

02:02 The Importance of Conversations About Masculinity

05:17 Understanding Boys' Online Behavior

11:05 Addressing Social Cruelty and Bullying

23:26 Modeling Positive Behavior for Boys

26:23 Conclusion and Next Episode Preview

Host Dr. Ruston introduces Screenagers' recently launched Screen-Free Sleep campaign, focused on helping parents keep devices out of kids' bedrooms for sleep time.

Ruston explains the campaign's goals, the science behind it, and how you can participate in making screen-free sleep the norm in your child's school and community. This includes resources like iSleep Pro kits and a fun flash mob dance.

She also offers practical solutions to some of the common challenges parents face when creating tech-free sleep for their kids and tweens.

It all wraps up with lively "Man on the Street" interviews with parents and kids, making it a perfect listen for adults to enjoy together with their children.

Resources

www.screenfreesleep.org

Time Code

00:00 Introduction to Screen-Free Sleep

00:41 About the Screen-Free Sleep Campaign

06:28 Man on the Street Interviews

11:09 Common Pushbacks and Solutions

15:43 Student Sleep Health Week and Resources

17:01 Call to Action and Conclusion

Parenting kids has always had challenges, but now, in the tech revolution, conflicts are at a new level. The good news is that research shows that conflicts done well have all sorts of benefits for youth. But how do we ensure healthier conflicts?

Dr. Ruston talks with Lisa Damour, Ph.D., psychologist and author of three New York Times best-selling books about adolescents, including "The Emotional Lives of Teenagers."

The episode explores teen psychology, common screen time arguments, and several approaches to having healthier conflicts. The episode is intended for adult and youth audiences.

Featured Expert

Lisa Damour

Research References

The role of music in adolescents' mood regulation (Sage Journal)

Extreme Metal Music and Anger Processing (Frontiers in Human Neuroscience)

The appeal of sad music: A brief overview of current directions in research on motivations for listening to sad music (The Arts in Psychotherapy)

Additional Links

Lisa Damour's website

The Ask Lisa Podcast

Books by Lisa Damour

Untangled

Under Pressure

The Emotional Lives Of Teenagers