Bullies tend to be people who have been bullied themselves. And it’s up to moms and dads to stop this destructive cycle.

This weekend on Parenting Today’s Teens, Mark Gregston discusses why bullying happens, what to do when your kid is being bullied, and how you can raise kindhearted kids.

Do you value hard work? Are you the type of parent who’s responsible, who’s taken risks and moved up the corporate ladder?

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston… with Parenting Today’s Teens.

I don’t know of any parent who would choose a life of laziness and irresponsibility over hard work and reward. That’s because you and I know the outcome. We actually relish the rewards that come through blood, sweat and tears.

In that case, why would we treat our kids any differently? Mom and Dad, if you’re doing everything for your teen… if you’re allowing them to be lazy… you’re missing the opportunity to instill a deep-seated respect for hard work and deep reward.

Your child’s adult life will require lots of hard work. So start teaching them how to deal with it now! Don’t allow your good intentions to rob your child of the rich reward.

Respect and disrespect. Two opposing virtues that show up in every realm of life.

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston… with Parenting Today’s Teens.

Moms and dads dislike it when a child slams a door … or rolls his eyes… or treats siblings poorly. These actions may seem small right now… and parents may be tempted to look the other way. In the total mix of things… you probably have bigger issues to deal with than contempt!

But let me challenge you on this important issue of disrespect. Though some of the actions will disappear as your teen matures… when disrespect is allowed, it’ll become a bad habit that carries into adulthood.

On the flip side… if you teach respect, you’re equipping your teen to flourish in relationships long after they’ve left your home.

So what’ll it be? Disrespect? Or respect? The choice is yours.

When the kids get to the pre-teen years… it’s not only our sons and daughters that need to grow up!

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston… with Parenting Today’s Teens.

The kids are learning and growing, of course. But parents need to change, as well. We’re not done growin’ up … even in our 30’s, 40’s or 50’s.

If we get stuck in our ways… and continue to parent like we always have… most likely we’ll make a mess of things! What worked in the past, won’t work when a son or daughter hits twelve or thirteen. That’s when they start changing… and we should, too!

When conflict comes, be sure to ask yourself, What do I need to learn here? And… if you’re brave enough, ask your kids what they think you need to learn!

Now’s your chance to parent at the next level. Today’s the day to change!

One of the hardest things about kids moving into their teen years… is that the transition often leads to a season of bumbling mistakes and over-bearing pain. And the clean up effort often falls squarely on Mom and Dad’s shoulders!

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston … with Parenting Today’s Teens.

If we expect an apology every time a young person hurts or disappoints us… we’d be miserable most of the time! In those inevitable moments when our kids invoke pain… our role is to offer forgiveness… and expect nothing in return.

You see, we can’t demand repentance from our kids. It doesn’t work that way. But we can offer what the Lord has given freely to us. And that’s mercy. And grace.

When the teen years inflict pain on you, don’t manipulate your children into repentance. Mom, Dad, model grace, mercy and forgiveness.

Parents are wired to rescue their children when the water gets too deep. It’s natural. But too much protection can backfire!

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston… with Parenting Today’s Teens.

Unfortunately, our generation focuses more on protection than it does on preparing kids to survive… which is why so many teens today are ill-equipped to meet the world. They don’t grow up because we don’t let them.

Even though most teens are capable of intellectual and biological adulthood, our well- intended actions to shelter them does nothing more than stunt their growth!

Rescuing a child from consequences is one of the biggest culprits.

Mom, Dad …if your child is drowning… then, for sure, jump in and rescue him. But if he’s just floundering in the water, a little over his head …stand back and let him learn to swim!

Conflict can harden the hardest heart—but love can melt the coldest of fronts.

This weekend on Parenting Today’s Teens, Mark Gregston gives five reasons why developing a closer relationship with your teen can nip a discipline problem in the bud before it becomes unmanageable.

Pain gets our attention, doesn’t it? Smash your thumb with a hammer and suddenly life changes for a day or two.

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston … with Parenting Today’s Teens.

Physical pain is certainly unfortunate. But emotional and relational pain can be debilitating, too. Maybe you’re experiencing pain right now in your family… or you’re suffering from defeat. When pain overwhelms your life, you’re only focused on finding relief.

But running from the pain… avoiding discomfort at all costs… isn’t what we’re called to do. No… we need to make an intentional choice to see pain as God’s divine tool. He’s using suffering to motivate us to grow up!

If there’s pain in your life and home today… don’t run. Embrace it. Learn from it. And when you’re ready, thank God for His relentless pursuit …even when it hurts.

Parents are often gravely concerned about their teen’s behavior. The ugly dust ups can cause the whole family to spiral out of control.

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston… with Parenting Today’s Teens.

When there’s conflict in the home, it’s important to figure out what’s behind the behavior. We cannot discount the sin and turmoil of an out-of-control teen… but in order to find a solution, it’s essential to determine the root cause. Acting out is a symptom of a deeper problem, and as parents, it’s our job to peel back the layers and figure out what’s hiding behind the facade.

Next time your teen is acting out and behaving inappropriately, make it your job to find out what’s behind it all.

Behavior is never the main issue. It always points to something bigger.

If you had to limit five non-negotiable battles in your home… what would they be?

Hi, I’m Mark Gregston … with Parenting Today’s Teens.

Mom, Dad, it’s critically important to choose your battles wisely. So, let me share a trick. Sit down and think through the most important conflicts with your teen. Identify the issues where you refuse to budge. Choose only five… and determine to compromise on the lesser ones.

So… what are the five most important conflicts in your home? Will you stick to your guns on academics? Modest? Video games? The choice of friends? Will you make a big deal out of sexual activity… or cleaning a room?

There’s always conflict when a teen is in the house… so choose to rank the big stuff as non-negotiable. Pick your battles wisely!