Passion Struck with John R. Miles

What if the reason you're exhausted is not that you have too much to do, but because you're carrying too much that doesn't matter?

You say yes to another meeting, another favor, another responsibility. Not because you want to. Not because you owe it. But because saying no feels like telling someone you're not useful. And somewhere along the way, your calendar fills up while the things you actually care about get pushed aside.

In Episode 846 of Passion Struck, John R. Miles explores why we instinctively add more instead of subtracting what no longer serves us, and how the need to prove our worth through usefulness quietly drains our time, energy, and attention.

You don't have a time problem. You might have a subtraction problem.

Drawing on research from Dr. Leidy Klotz, the wisdom of Marcus Aurelius, insights from Daniel Coyle, and lessons from conversations with Dr. Kristen Holmes and Major General Charles Bolden, John reveals why doing less can help you live more meaningfully.

At the heart of this episode is The Subtraction Ledger, a practical 20-minute exercise that helps you identify which commitments deserve your attention, which obligations need redesigning, and which responsibilities you're carrying simply to prove your worth.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why we instinctively add commitments instead of removing unnecessary ones.
• How the need to prove you're useful creates a hidden mattering tax.
• Why saying no can feel like a threat to your sense of worth.
• What an apple tree teaches us about pruning our lives.
• Why fewer, better commitments create room for meaningful relationships and purposeful work.
• How to distinguish what you choose, what you owe, and what you're doing to prove yourself.
• How to use The Subtraction Ledger, a practical three-column exercise to reclaim your time and energy.
• Why protecting empty space creates the capacity to handle life's unexpected demands.

Grab a notebook and spend 20 minutes creating your own Subtraction Ledger.

1. Chosen: What commitments would you willingly choose again? Protect these.
2. Owed: What responsibilities genuinely belong to you? Redesign how you carry them without unnecessary perfectionism or martyrdom.
3. Proving: What are you doing primarily to demonstrate that you're capable, reliable, or indispensable? Identify one commitment to release.

Choose one recurring commitment in your Proving column and release it within the next 48 hours. Then resist filling the space. Give it back to what matters.

Thank you to our sponsors

Uncommon Goods: Discover unique, meaningful holiday gifts from independent artists and small businesses. Get 15% off your next order at uncommongoods.com/passionstruck.

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Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the secret to performing at your best isn't pushing harder but becoming more aligned?

In this episode of Passion Struck, John R. Miles sits down with Dr. Kristen Holmes, performance scientist, VP of Performance at WHOOP, and author of Aligned: The Data-Driven Guide to Performance, Recovery, and Human Potential, for a powerful conversation about the science of human flourishing.

After years competing at the highest levels of field hockey and coaching elite athletes at Princeton, Kristen discovered that achievement alone doesn't guarantee happiness, fulfillment, or even a healthy relationship with yourself. Today, her research and work with millions of physiological data points reveal how the behaviors we practice, the identities we construct, and the rhythms we follow shape our energy, resilience, and potential.

Together, John and Kristen explore why so many high achievers become exhausted chasing external validation, how to rebuild an identity grounded in values rather than outcomes, and what it takes to create the physical, psychological, and emotional capacity to navigate life's demands.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why performance isn't just about capability: The distinction between building skills and building the capacity to consistently use them without sacrificing your health.
• The sleep behavior that matters most: Why Kristen identifies sleep-wake consistency as a foundational predictor of physiological and psychological resilience.
• How to stop waking up at 2 a.m.: The circadian principles, morning light, consistent wake times, and evening behaviors that can help support better sleep.
• Why high achievers lose themselves: How external validation and outcome-driven ambition can undermine joy, identity, and self-worth.
• How to reconstruct your identity: A practical way to reconnect your behaviors with your values and the person you aspire to become.
• Why winning doesn't always make you happy: What elite athletes reveal about achievement, intrinsic motivation, and the pursuit of feeling enough.
• The availability reserve: How to build a surplus of energy, strength, and resilience so you're prepared when life becomes demanding.
• The five domains of intelligent training: Why strength training, cardiovascular fitness, recovery, and movement throughout the day all contribute to resilience.
• How to manage stress without becoming depleted: Why recovery isn't simply inactivity and how brief restorative moments can help prevent stress accumulation.
• The relationship between time and trust: How rumination about the past and future can disconnect us from the present, and why presence is a skill worth developing.
• What alignment actually makes possible: How performance and achievement become more sustainable when they no longer determine your worth.

Kristen offers a compelling reminder that the ultimate goal isn't simply to achieve more. It's to build the capacity to live your values, enjoy the process, and remain available for the people and experiences that matter most. When your identity is grounded in who you want to be, your behaviors reflect what you care about, and your body can support your life, performance becomes something that emerges from alignment rather than something you have to sacrifice yourself to achieve.

This conversation invites you to reconsider a fundamental question: What if the greatest measure of success isn't what you accomplish, but how fully you are able to live?

Check the full shownotes.

Thank you to our sponsors

Uncommon Goods: Discover unique, meaningful holiday gifts from independent artists and small businesses. Get 15% off your next order at uncommongoods.com/passionstruck.

Shopify: It’s time to turn those “What Ifs” into SFX: CHA-CHING with Shopify today. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at SHOPIFY DOT COM SLASH passionstruck.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What does it mean to live the American dream? And what responsibility do we have to make that dream possible for others?

In this special Veterans Day episode of Passion Struck, John R. Miles sits down with Major General Charles Bolden, former NASA administrator, Marine combat pilot, and astronaut, for a powerful conversation about Astronauts for America, the Constitution, democracy, and our shared responsibility to bridge America's growing divisions.

Growing up in the Jim Crow South, Bolden experienced firsthand how exclusion can limit people's opportunities. His parents, both educators, instilled in him the importance of education, responsibility, and service. Those values would guide him through a remarkable career spanning military aviation, space exploration, and national leadership.

In this conversation, you'll discover:

• Why Astronauts for America was created: The concerns that brought former astronauts together to defend the Constitution, democracy, and the principles that define America.
• What it means to defend the Constitution: Why Bolden believes our oath is to the Constitution, not to an individual or political party.
• How to find common ground in a divided world: Bolden's practical approach to beginning conversations with people whose political beliefs differ dramatically from our own.
• Why civil discourse matters: How the erosion of respectful dialogue threatens our ability to solve problems and govern ourselves.
• What the American dream really means: How Bolden's experiences growing up in the Jim Crow South shaped his understanding of opportunity, inclusion, and citizenship.
• How former enemies became friends: The remarkable story of Bolden and Russian cosmonaut Sergei Krikalev, whose conversation about their children helped transform their relationship.
• Why belonging is essential to democracy: Bolden's argument that inclusion means ensuring people feel they have a place in our society and a voice in its future.
• What we owe the next generation: Why America's future depends on the choices we make today and our willingness to take responsibility for the country we leave behind.

Bolden's message is both challenging and hopeful: we don't have to agree on everything to work toward something better. We can begin by listening, finding what we share, and remembering that the people on the other side of a disagreement are human beings with families, hopes, and futures of their own.

Through Astronauts for America, he is putting those principles into action, encouraging Americans to engage, learn, participate, and rediscover the common ground that makes collective progress possible.

This conversation challenges us to consider a fundamental question: What does it mean to defend America's principles and help create a future where everyone has the opportunity to belong?

Check the full shownotes here.

Thank you to our sponsors

Uncommon Goods: Discover unique, meaningful holiday gifts from independent artists and small businesses. Get 15% off your next order at uncommongoods.com/passionstruck.

Shopify: It’s time to turn those “What Ifs” into SFX: CHA-CHING with Shopify today. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at SHOPIFY DOT COM SLASH passionstruck.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if you don't have a passion, a special talent, or an obvious calling? What if you're simply trying to figure out what matters to you and how you can make a meaningful difference?

In this episode of Passion Struck, John R. Miles explores how to find purpose when you don't know what you're meant to do. Drawing on the remarkable story of Nicholas Winton, who helped rescue 669 children from Nazi persecution, John challenges the belief that meaningful lives begin with discovering an extraordinary calling.

Instead, he shares three powerful clues to help you uncover what matters, recognize where you can contribute, and start building a life of significance. You don't have to discover your passion before you start living meaningfully. Sometimes, purpose emerges through the things you care about, the people you help, and the responsibilities you choose to embrace.

Check the full show notes here

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why you don't need a calling, passion, or exceptional talent to matter
• How our culture confuses achievement with significance
• Why ordinary acts of care can create extraordinary meaning
• What Nicholas Winton teaches us about purpose and follow-through
• The Three Clues for discovering what matters to you
• How your personal history shapes what you notice and care about
• Why responsibility and contribution can help you discover purpose
• How losing an identity or title can reveal what truly matters
• Why mattering is about both feeling valued and adding value
• How to take one meaningful action within forty-eight hours

Thank you to our sponsors

Uncommon Goods: Discover unique, meaningful holiday gifts from independent artists and small businesses. Get 15% off your next order at uncommongoods.com/passionstruck.

Shopify: It’s time to turn those “What Ifs” into SFX: CHA-CHING with Shopify today. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at SHOPIFY DOT COM SLASH passionstruck.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if you don't have a motivation problem but a time problem?

Most of us know we should eat healthier. But between work, family, responsibilities, and the demands of everyday life, preparing nourishing meals can feel like one more impossible task. When time runs out, convenience takes over, and the cycle of exhaustion, unhealthy choices, and frustration continues.

In this episode of Passion Struck, John R. Miles sits down with Carleigh Bodrug, founder of Plant You, bestselling cookbook author, and creator of a community helping millions make plant-based eating more approachable.

Carleigh shares how her father's colon cancer diagnosis sparked her journey into plant-based cooking, why perfectionism can sabotage sustainable change, and how small, realistic adjustments can transform the way we nourish ourselves.

Drawing from her new cookbook, Plant You Quickies (#1 New York Times Bestseller), Carleigh shares practical ways to eat healthier without spending hours in the kitchen, including her "Got This, Make That" approach to reducing food waste, simple meal-planning strategies, and SOS suppers that turn convenience foods into more nourishing meals.

You'll also discover why fiber deserves far more attention, how plant diversity supports gut health, and why building a handful of dependable meals can be more powerful than following an elaborate diet.

This conversation reminds us that taking care of yourself doesn't require a perfect routine. It requires choices that work for the life you're actually living.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why healthy eating is often a time problem rather than a motivation problem
• How small food changes can become sustainable habits
• Why fiber and plant diversity deserve more attention
• How to meal plan around the food you already have
• How to make healthier meals without spending hours cooking
• Why perfectionism and shame can undermine behavior change
• How to get back on track when life disrupts your routines

Check the full shownotes here.

About Carleigh Bodrug

Carleigh Bodrug is the founder of Plant You, a bestselling cookbook author, and a leading voice in making plant-based cooking accessible and practical. Through her recipes, books, and online community, she helps millions discover approachable ways to eat more plants and build healthier habits.

Explore her work at PlantYou.com and find her new cookbook, Plant You Quickies, wherever books are sold.

Thank you to our sponsors

Uncommon Goods: Discover unique, meaningful holiday gifts from independent artists and small businesses. Get 15% off your next order at uncommongoods.com/passionstruck.

Shopify: It’s time to turn those “What Ifs” into SFX: CHA-CHING with Shopify today. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at SHOPIFY DOT COM SLASH passionstruck.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the way you eat has less to do with food than with how you feel about yourself?

For registered dietitian and author Lee Cotton, the path to understanding nutrition began with her own struggles with food and body image. In this conversation, she shares how those experiences shaped her work helping people develop healthier, more compassionate relationships with food—and why nourishment begins with recognizing that we matter.

On Episode 841 of Passion Struck, John R. Miles and Lee explore the emotional stories, childhood messages, cultural pressures, and personal experiences that influence how we eat. They discuss the connection between food and self-worth, the impact of trauma and stress on eating behaviors, and why body image challenges can become especially complicated during perimenopause and menopause.

Lee also explains the importance of mindful eating, realistic nutrition goals, listening to the body's signals, and resisting the idea that one diet or eating pattern works for everyone. Drawing on her work with people experiencing disordered eating and eating disorders, she emphasizes the importance of professional support, individualized guidance, and approaching food without unnecessary fear or shame.

Check out the full show notes.

• Why our relationship with food is often a reflection of our relationship with ourselves.
• How childhood food rules and family messages can shape eating behaviors well into adulthood.
• The connection between self-worth, body image, and the desire to control food.
• How stress, trauma, and difficult life experiences can influence eating patterns.
• Why mindful eating starts with pausing, listening, and recognizing your body's signals.
• How realistic nutrition goals and small changes can build sustainable momentum.
• Why perimenopause and menopause can bring new challenges around body image, nourishment, and control.
• Why the most important affirmation may be: You are worthy of nourishment.

At the heart of the conversation is a powerful reminder: nourishment is about more than fueling the body. It expresses care, and everyone deserves it. As Lee puts it: You are worthy of nourishment.

Grab a copy of A Nourishing Perspective.

Thank you to our sponsors

Uncommon Goods: Discover unique, meaningful holiday gifts from independent artists and small businesses. Get 15% off your next order at uncommongoods.com/passionstruck.

Shopify: It’s time to turn those “What Ifs” into SFX: CHA-CHING with Shopify today. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at SHOPIFY DOT COM SLASH passionstruck.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the story you've been telling yourself about who you are was never really yours?

In 1979, a collection of interviews with college students disappeared into the archives. Decades later, Harvard developmental psychologist Alexis Redding helped uncover the recordings—and found young people wrestling with many of the same questions we face today: Who am I? Where do I belong? Am I doing enough?

On Episode 840 of Passion Struck, John R. Miles connects Redding's discovery with insights from author Jon Acuff on procrastination, identity, and the mental soundtracks that keep us stuck. Together, their ideas reveal how family expectations, schools, workplaces, and influential people can shape beliefs we carry long after the original moment has passed.

From the pressure to appear effortlessly successful to the childhood labels that limit our ambitions, this episode explores how we can mistake an old message for an enduring truth.

John introduces The Tape Check, a three-question exercise to help you identify the belief you're replaying, understand where it came from, and test whether it still holds up. Drawing on the Wright brothers' willingness to question accepted data, he shows why small experiments can be more powerful than simply trying to think positively.

Because you may not have chosen every story that shaped you—but you can decide what plays next.

• What decades-old student recordings reveal about the beliefs and pressures that persist across generations.
• How family, school, and workplace environments shape the stories we tell ourselves.
• Why labels like “not a natural leader” can influence decisions for decades.
• How perfectionism and the pressure to look successful can keep people from taking meaningful risks.
• Why procrastination can begin with identity beliefs before showing up in our actions.
• How to use the three-question Tape Check to challenge an inherited belief.
• Why small experiments can help you discover what you're capable of without committing to a lifelong path.
• How sharing the messy middle of your own story can help someone else rewrite theirs.

The beliefs that shape your life may have originated in a room you left years ago. Recognizing where they came from gives you the opportunity to question them, test them, and choose a different way forward.

You can't unhear it once you've heard it. And you get to decide what plays next.

Check the full shownotes here.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if procrastination isn't a problem with your time, but a problem with what you believe you're capable of doing?

You know what you want to change. You have ideas, ambitions, and goals. Yet somehow, you keep waiting for the right moment, the perfect plan, or the confidence to begin.

On this episode of Passion Struck, I sit down with Jon Acuff, bestselling author of Procrastination Proof, to explore why so many capable people get stuck between intention and action. Drawing on his work helping people overcome procrastination and build more remarkable lives, Jon explains how fear, perfectionism, comparison, and the stories we tell ourselves can quietly limit what we attempt. We also discuss why the desire to do something meaningful often creates the discipline needed to pursue it, rather than the other way around.

In this conversation, you'll discover:

• Why procrastination isn't just a time-management problem: Jon defines it as the gap between your intentions and your actions.
• How fear disguises itself as preparation: Why overthinking, perfectionism, and waiting for the perfect starting point can keep you stuck.
• The power of giving yourself permission: How remarkable people learn to talk themselves into trying instead of talking themselves out of it.
• The four permissions: How to dream, plan, do, and review your way toward meaningful goals.
• Why identity shapes action: How beliefs such as “I'm not a writer” or “I'm not a natural leader” can become limitations we carry for decades.
• How comparison makes you feel behind: Why someone else's success doesn't mean your own opportunities have passed.
• The signs you carry through life: How messages from parents, teachers, and coworkers can shape what you believe you're allowed to achieve.
• Why believing you matter changes what you attempt: How small wins can restore a sense of agency and help you move beyond the soundtrack of “Why bother?”
• How to discover what motivates you: Why Jon recommends auditioning a goal for 15 minutes a day over seven days instead of waiting for a perfect life plan.

Jon also shares the advice that helped him expand his own ambitions, why he believes we often underestimate our potential, and how to build a life that feels rich across career, finances, relationships, health, and fun.

You don't need to have your entire future figured out before you begin. You need to identify the next step you're willing to take, give yourself permission to try, and learn from what happens.

Check out the full show notes.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if today's young people aren't as different from previous generations as we think?

When Alexis Redding and her colleagues uncovered interviews with college students from the 1970s, they found familiar stories of loneliness, academic pressure, family expectations, and uncertainty about the future.

In this episode of Passion Struck, the Harvard developmental psychologist and editor of Mental Health in College: What Research Tells Us About Supporting Students explores what has changed across generations, why belonging matters to student well-being and success, and how parents, educators, and institutions can create environments where young adults feel seen, heard, valued, and encouraged.

Together, Miles and Redding examine the pressure to achieve, the myth of effortless perfection, the importance of student voices, and why learning to pivot may be one of the most valuable skills young adults can develop.

• What archival recordings reveal about the similarities between college students across generations.
• Why blaming “kids these days” gets in the way of meaningful solutions.
• How belonging influences academic performance, help-seeking, persistence, and graduation.
• Why colleges need a campus-wide culture of care—not just a crisis-response model.
• How parents and educators can share their own failures and uncertainties to help young people feel less alone.
• Why perfectionism and achievement pressure make it harder for students to take risks and explore.
• How small changes in language can encourage curiosity rather than prescribe a single path.
• Why career pivots and reinvention are normal parts of adulthood, not signs of failure.

Young people don't need adults to pretend that life follows a predictable path. They need environments where they can struggle, ask for help, take risks, and learn to find their way. When students feel that they belong, they have more freedom to grow.

Alexis Redding's work reminds us that the question isn't simply what's wrong with young people. It's what we can change about the environments surrounding them. 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alexisredding/

Get the full show notes here.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What happens when the next achievement matters more than the one you just reached?

Even after The Mattering Effect landed on the USA Today bestseller list, John caught himself immediately checking where it might rank on the NYT bestseller list. That instinct revealed how deeply conditioned even the most intentional leaders are to let external scorecards dictate internal worth.

In this solo series finale, John connects the dots across three essential conversations:

• Dr. Nir Halevy (Stanford): How tournament theory and stacked rankings pull teams apart and breed learned helplessness.
• Dr. Kristin Neff (UT Austin): How the environment's scorecard moves inside your head as a ruthless inner critic—and why self-compassion provides the safe soil for true agency.
• Heather Monahan: What it looks like to recognize you built your own cage, stop shrinking yourself, stand tall, and know when to change your room versus change your mindset.

Drawing on a timeless parable from Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s The Little Prince, John examines our cultural obsession with "the figures" and delivers The Blueprint Check: a concrete, three-question diagnostic framework to run on your workplace, your social feeds, and your daily life.

Key Takeaways

• The Scorecard Trap: Why rankings, quotas, and follower counts tell us where we stand relative to others—but not who we are.
• Tournament Theory at Work: How outsized rewards for top performers can fuel destructive competition, while others disengage or begin to experience what Martin Seligman called learned helplessness.
• Self-Esteem vs. Self-Compassion: Why constantly evaluating yourself keeps you on the achievement treadmill, while self-compassion helps you respond to setbacks with greater clarity and agency.
• The Worcester Academy Realization: How Heather Monahan discovered that the room hadn't changed—her perception of herself had—and why it's equally important to recognize when a genuinely toxic environment needs to change.
• The Three-Part Move: How to reclaim agency by changing your response, working to change the environment, or leaving a system that refuses to change.

Your worth was never meant to be a number on someone else's scorecard. The goal isn't to stop measuring your progress. It's to stop confusing your performance with your value as a person.

Click here for the full show notes.

Get your copy of The Mattering Effect

What happens when you spend so much of your life showing up for everyone else that you start to disappear from yourself? Take the 90-second diagnostic to discover whether you're experiencing the signs of unmattering.

Explore the Passion Struck Starter Packs

Not sure where to begin? Discover curated episode collections designed to help you explore the ideas, conversations, and questions that matter most.

• Website: johnrmiles.com
• Speaking and Events: Book John to Speak
• Substack: The Ignited Life
• Children's Book: You Matter, Luma

• Passion Struck Speakers: Discover speakers who inspire meaningful change.
• Passion Struck Speaking School: Develop your message and become a more impactful speaker.
• Passion Struck Podcast Network: Connect with a community committed to intentional living and personal growth.

Visit Start Mattering

Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and significant. Help make that belief visible. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

The #1 Health & Fitness Podcast. More than 85 million downloads.

Passion Struck is provided for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered medical, mental health, or psychological advice, or a substitute for consultation with a qualified professional.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.