Patio Lanterns

SPORTS TALK IS BACK

The St. Louis Blues win the Stanley Cup. Nice job team! What's your favorite instagram filter? Kurt receives a standing ovation!! Ryan gets lost in the upside down! And we've got a new power move for you to try on your next date.

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

WE THE BEST PODCAST

A music heavy episode of the pod.....Kurt sings Katy Perry's new hit single and introduces 4 nominees for #SONGOFTHESUMMER. Ryan suggests a new power (weirdo) move to try on tinder dates. Later, we try finding each on Chatroulette.

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

Come on in, the water's fine! The boys have RAPTOR'S FEVER!! Jk, Randy thinks Lebron is playing and Kurt is just there for the liquor. Kurt experiences violent explosions from his toilet and nearly destroys his house.

Our dear Patio Lanternites got way to many problems on their hands so we brought in advice-expert Ms. Shanna Graham on the show to help (min 30).

The Roy is a great place to relax

and meet with friends. Great food

and friendly waitresses await you,

with daily food specials and a

warm atmosphere.

PATIO LANTERNS - THE BASKETBALL AND GARDENING PODCAST

Ryan encounters some weird sneezers. Kurt encounters an ant. Game of Thrones is over but our rants are just beginning.

Congrats to "Give me Hedman" for winning the 2019 Patio Lanterns NHL Bracket Challenge!

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

IT'S THE PODCASTING PLAYOFFS - "It's the time you really gotta prove yourself, cause everyone's going out for summer."

After a disturbing hiatus, we're back! Kurt is sick and Randy is in a foreign land. Why aren't dress shorts more common? How are our NHL brackets doing? (Hint: badly). The Big Dog Daddy throws out a heater just in time for summer while Taylor Swift disappoints (ME lol) big time.

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

MOON BOOTS ARE HERE AND THE FUTURE STINKS

ICBC is modifying our genomes? We HATE Game of Thrones HATERS. Kurt envisions Randy on the cover of "Dad" magazine. Donation bins - why are they dangerous and can they be stopped? Everyone's NHL brackets are busted - get the inside scoop on this edition of #sportstalk.

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

The official podcast of the NHL

Welcome to the Patio Lanterns NHL bracket challenge! We have created a fantasy league for big $$$. Listen to our tips, tricks, and quips in our sports segment! Randy has a new "power" move. Kurt got a part of his body waxed.

1. Create a bracket here:

https://cliambrown.com/bracket2019/

2. Copy your secret edit link, and then paste it here:

https://cliambrown.com/bracket2019/league/join/xqd3qctr

You can check out the league members & results here:

https://cliambrown.com/bracket2019/league/xpjz6

PS: Send $20 to our email: [email protected] to officially enter into the grand prize sweepstakes!

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

LEGALLY BLIND NAKED MAN GUNNED DOWN SPRINTING ACROSS FORMULA ONE CIRCUIT

Randy and Kurt have had enough of their respective big city lifestyles and are moving out to separate small towns. Randy has a new business idea and you can have it, free of charge! Michelob Ultra changed their slogan and it really irks Kurt. Kurt ventures to a house party and is met with mixed results. "Where have all the illegally blind people gone" - Sam Roberts.

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

LET'S CANOODLE

Sit down, shut up and get ready for our hottest episode yet. The boys create THE perfect playlist to fulfill your every sexual desire. We also start the conversation on SONG OF THE SUMMER 2019. The spa is good and you guys should check it out. One thing not to check out...grapefruit. THEY SUCK.

Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

Check out our bedroom bangers playlist from this episode:

https://open.spotify.com/user/1xr51mc3oj8wvpqcvtzlrh2qn/playlist/1d9Rc1vkE2dR4R5uemZDrl?si=bhj36DImRDi34V-i50JJ0Q

I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride

I'm gon ride on you baby, on you lady all night, all night

I'ma take care of your body, I'll be gentle, don't you scream

It's getting hotter, make it softer, feel your chest on top of me

I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride

I'm gon ride on you baby, on you lady all night, all night

I'm gon make you feel that loving, getting weak all in your knees

Kiss your body from the tip top all the way down to your feet.

[0 mins]: Winter SUCKS and anybody who says different is a liar! Stop with the super erotic worm moons already. Kurt finally watched all of the Rocky and Creed movies and re-ranked them to Randy's displeasure.

[35 mins]: Our favorite kiwi, Ryder Hoy (HOYYYYYYY), orders the tuna, no crust.

Instagram: @plpodcast