PDX Sucks

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This is it. This is the last one. There will be no more. 
Well, there'll be others, but there won't be any more like this one. 
Does that not make sense? Hmmm. Ok. Well, give me 30 minutes and I'll try my best to explain it to you.

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2025 is here, whether you or I like it or not. So, join me as I continue to experience increasingly deepening levels of existential dread, disprove the myth the death in your dreams causes death in real life, and fight the good fight against artificial intelligence – all while being relentlessly harassed by a mentally challenged cat.

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Yeah, so THAT happened, and here we are, almost two weeks later and if you're like me, you're still processing what it all means, how we got here, and what happens next. Quite frankly I'd rather just sleep through the next 4 years but that's not an option.

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Gun violence hits a little too close to the Wagner homestead last week, casting a bit of a shadow over almost everything else, but that doesn't stop the damn cat from yelling at me throughout the recording.

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In which our hero endeavors to make sense of celebrity excuses, acquire a chicken sandwich slathered with hot mayonnaise, defends the right of every entrepreneur to create their creations, and laughs at what a loser the loser of last night's Presidential debate is.

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It's back to school day! And what better way to celebrate than to learn all about how bicyclists don't have to stop at stop signs anymore (except for when they do), how Fred Meyer employees dare ask for more and better, how the Supreme Court doesn't care about you whatsoever, and how entitled podcasters can all go f**k themselves.

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My quest for a mostly analog existence continues but that would mean a dramatic reduction in stupid social media arguments over whether or not Nintendo is making worthwhile video games in 2024. Why this matters I do not know but fanboys are going to fanboy. In other news, Pearl Jam rocks. Thanks Tom.

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Frustrated with a) people's inability to hold themselves (or others) accountable and b) the ever-growing problem of drug-fueled crime in our fair city, our hero decides to go for a walk, clear his head, and try to make sense out of the world. Spoiler Alert: he doesn't succeed. 

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Health scares, dog scares, future scares, and maybe a few other random scares. Scares are the topic of this one. Bottom line: I don't want to die, I don't want to talk about my scooter, and I don't want the guy at the food cart to give a woman a discount that she doesn't need nor deserve. That is all.

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What began as a simple Happy Holidays episodes turns into a complete trainwreck thanks to Gary the Cat, the Portland Police Department, and the DLZ Creator Super Duper Podcast Recorder by Mackie.

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