Pod and Tears

In which our intrepid heroes buy a pack of BnT CCG cards and unwrap a LEGENDARY FOIL HAWCA! After last week, the lack of a shimmering veiny monster clearly ADDS to the value of this card, though a foil cock card may actually be interestin... I'm getting off topic.

Hawca teaches us how to build a plan for your turn, talks a bit out World Cup, and skillfully dodges the question about what his plan would be if he were going to take over the world. Because, obviously, he can't us that and expect to still DO it.

Sir Shaggrath had to depart to save a town from the tribulations of being annoying dice-whiners, so winner of our LOGO CONTEST(!) Fleekyfly is my co-host. We grill TonyW about many things, but I'm not gonna sugar coat it, there is a lot of dick talked about in this episode. We can all blame Rand for that.

Our weary travelers stumbled upon a REBBL camp, where they found a fearless leader to impart much great wisdom upon them. Like, "if you ever get a chance, eat a kangaroo".

Many thanks to Metal and the REBBL community for crossing the great platform divide to hang out!

In which our heroes find out that their account is overdrawn due to spiraling expenses. Banker Beerz is there to provide brilliant insight, infectious giggles, and a hell of a good time. The Authority weighs in, spreading horrible lies about goblins, and secures us a sponsor(?!?!)

In which our merry triad of wanderers stumble upon the ancient tablet of Momo, which readeth "Thou shalt not be confused as to who to blitzeth even when the plan is not cleareth". Our heroes disregard it entirely, and instead, spend an inordinate amount of time talking about pro wrestling.

In which our merry band of adventurers are accosted by a large bear -- which is promptly wrestled down by COLE! He cooks it, served with gravy and Yorkshire Pudding, before lamenting the travelers with tales of linemen!

In which our heroes trudge through whatever that swamp from the Neverending story was where the horse died. Fuck, that was sad. I definitely cried then. I might still cry now. Anyways, they stumbled upon a freshly levelled up staff named Dio. Long, thin, and ginger -- looking oddly like a carrot. It carried a great power of GiveNoFuck, however, and taught us how to not be salty bitches.

In which our heroes are joined by THE AUTHORITY, who promptly grosses them out with concepts of sweaty meat sandwiches that only a dragon would eat. We talk about the intangibles, while not wanting to touch any part of that disgusting ass word. Flesh bed. Yuck.

In which our heroes stumble upon a talking Fox, the sort of Fox in flip flops. They discuss changing it up, from being a lifelong agility coach trying something new. They discuss fouling, norse mankinis, why chaos sucks -- and the fox just pees the entire time, not even breaking eye contact.

In which our heroes hear a strange noise under the bed, and upon investigating -- find a Midway Monster! He fires back at Samt, gives us his take on the "pile on problem", and explains how lizardmen have tiny little British wieners.