Pod Sematary

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1431730816657199104

CW: Rape, Suicide, Harm to Animals

It’s Space Alien Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey celebrate Chris' birthday by wrapping up one of his favorite franchises: Alien! Yup! There are no more Alien movies!

The Classic Film: Alien 3 (1992)

"After her last encounter, Ellen Ripley crash-lands on Fiorina 161, a maximum-security prison. When a series of strange and deadly events occur shortly after her arrival, Ripley realizes that she has brought along an unwelcome visitor” (IMDb.com). Alien 3 may have been an absolute mess of a production—so much so that David Fincher disowned it entirely—but it may not be as bad as you've been led to believe.

The Modern Film: Life (2017)

"A team of scientists aboard the International Space Station discovers a rapidly evolving life form that caused extinction on Mars and now threatens all life on Earth” (Sony Pictures). This movie has more than what it takes to be a banger—great actors, terrifying thrills, and a clean premise—too bad it all rests on an infuriating script.

Audio Sources:

"Alien" produced by Brandywine Productions

"Alien 3" produced by Twentieth Century Fox & Brandywine Productions

"Fight Club" produced by Fox 2000 Pictures, et al.

"Invasion of the Body Snatchers" (1956) produced by Allied Artists Pictures & Walter Wanger Productions

"Life" (2017) produced by Columbia Pictures, et al.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Spirit in the Sky" written and performed by Norman Greenbaum

"Strong Bad Email #45 - Techno" via homestarrunnerdotcom @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwZwkk7q25I

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1427701064468516864

CW: Suicide, Torture, Ableism, Negative Depictions of Neurodiversity

It’s a Texas Chainsaw Double Feature on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey drive through Texas singing songs about other states—so, yeah, they deserve to die.

The Original: The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)

"Two siblings and three of their friends en route to visit their grandfather's grave in Texas fall victim to a family of cannibalistic psychopaths” (IMDb.com). Famous for being a success story as both an indie and an exploitation horror, the original Texas Chain Saw Massacre is both gritty and grounded in a way that is guaranteed to disturb.

The Remake: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

"After picking up a traumatized young hitchhiker, five friends find themselves stalked and hunted by a deformed chainsaw-wielding loon and his family of equally psychopathic killers” (IMDb.com). When Kelsey saw this movie at 16, having not seen the original, it shook her so bad that she had to get up and leave before the end. It was just that norm-breaking and effective at the time. Now that she's older and has seen the original, she may want to bail for different reasons.

Audio Sources:

"Adventures in Babysitting" produced by Touchstone Pictures & Silver Screen Partners III

"Beautiful Texas" written by W. Lee O'Daniel and performed by Willie Nelson

"Die Hard" produced by Twentieth Century Fox, et al.

"Muriel's Wedding" produced by CiBy 2000, et al.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Rocky Horror Picture Show" produced by Twentieth Century Fox & Michael White Productions

"Spaceballs" produced by Brooksfilms & Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer

"Street Fighter" (1994) produced by Capcom Entertainment & Edward R. Pressman Productions

"The Texas Chain Saw Massacre" (1974) produced by Vortex

"The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (2003) produced by New Line Cinema, et al.

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1424538982130487296

CW: Suicide, Overdose, Homophobia

It’s Friday the 13th on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey shave their heads, apply a very stylish smoky eye, and just go ham with a machete on a corpse. And all with a kickass 90s soundtrack.

The Classic Film: Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (1984)

"After being mortally wounded and taken to the morgue, murderer Jason Voorhees spontaneously revives and embarks on a killing spree as he makes his way back to his home at Camp Crystal Lake” (IMDb.com). Well, this is it. He finally bites it. While it absolutely isn't the last we'll see of Jason, The Final Chapter is the end of the Friday the 13th franchise as we know it. It's pretty much all downhill from here.

The Modern Film: Fear Street: Part One - 1994 (2021)

"A circle of teenage friends accidentally encounter the ancient evil responsible for a series of brutal murders that have plagued their town for over 300 years. Welcome to Shadyside” (IMDb.com). Part One of Netflix's and R.L. Stine's Fear Street Trilogy sets things off with a bang in a teen horror that was better than we thought it was going to be, despite its perhaps overly effusive celebration of the 90s—a decade that, we must stress, we love very much.

Audio Sources:

"Back in Black" written by Brian Johnson, et al., and performed by AC/DC

"Closer" written by Trent Reznor and performed by Nine Inch Nails

"Creep" written by Radiohead, et al., and performed by Radiohead

"Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History of Friday the 13th" produced by 1428 Films, et al.

"Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover" written and performed by Sophie B. Hawkins

"The Day I Tried To Live" written by Chris Cornell and performed by Soundgarden

"Fear Street: Part One - 1994" produced by Chernin Entertainment

"Firestarter" written by Liam Howlett, et al., and performed by the Prodigy

"The Fox and the Hound" produced by Walt Disney Animation Studios & Walt Disney Productions

"Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter" produced by Paramount Pictures, et al.

"Gz and Hustlas" written by Calvin Broadus, Jr., et al., and performed by Snoop Dogg featuring Nancy Fletcher

"Hey" written by Frank Black and performed by the Pixies

"Insane in the Brain" written by Louis Freese, et al., and performed by Cypress Hill

"Killing Me Softly with His Song" written by Charles Fox (composer) & Norman Gimbel (lyrics) and performed by Roberta Flack

"Love is a Lie (Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter Version)" written by Cal Swan and performed by Lion

"Machinehead" written by Gavin Rossdale and performed by Bush

"More Human than Human" written by Rob Zombie, et al., and performed by White Zombie

"Only Happy When It Rains" written and performed by Garbage

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Sweet Jane" written by Lou Reed and performed by the Cowboy Junkies

"Your Woman" written by Jyoti Mishra, et al., and performed by White Town

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1422239314688155655

CW: Homophobia, Rape, Suicide

It’s Wishmaster Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey wish they were wrapping up this franchise, but it turns out there's even more after this!

The Classic Film: Wishmaster 2: Evil Never Dies (1999)

"The evil Djinn is awakened once more and must collect 1,001 souls to begin the Apocalypse” (IMDb.com). Unlike the original Wishmaster, which was a lot of fun, this sequel seems like it's trying to actively avoid every opportunity for the coolest kills.

The Modern Film: Wishmaster 3: Beyond the Gates of Hell (2001)

"The evil Djinn is back at again, this time wreaking havoc on the students of Illinois' Baxter University” (IMDb.com). The one saving grace of Wishmaster 2 was that Andrew Divoff was at least still in it. He is not in part 3.

Audio Sources:

"Bitch" (Key and Peele S01E01) produced by Monkeypaw Productions, et al.

"Drag Queens and Goth People" (from The Top Part) written and performed by John Mulaney

"Let's Go to the Hop" (Family Guys S02E14) produced by Fuzzy Door Productions, et al.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Wishmaster 2: Evil Never Dies" produced by Artisan Entertainment

"Wishmaster 3: Beyond the Gates of Hell" produced by Artisan Entertainment, et al.

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/i/events/1419879251055038468

CW: Suicide

It’s Guest Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey invite one of the Jessies back for some seriously great and bonkers movies!

The Classic Film: House/Hausu (1977)

"A schoolgirl and six of her classmates travel to her aunt's country home, which turns out to be haunted” (IMDb.com). House may be—and this isn't a joke—just about the most bonkers horror movie ever made. And it's magnificent.

The Modern Film: Midsommar (2019)

"A couple travels to Scandinavia to visit a rural hometown's fabled Swedish mid-summer festival. What begins as an idyllic retreat quickly devolves into an increasingly violent and bizarre competition at the hands of a pagan cult” (IMDb.com). You might already know what we think of Ari Aster as a horror filmmaker from our episode on Hereditary, and we get more of his signature auteur style with Midsommar. But is his sophomore feature film more or less evocative than his first?

Audio Sources:

"Fanta Commercial - Fantanas" via Brian Friedman @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F614uU3DsqM

"House" (1977) produced by PSC & Toho Company

"House (1977) Monster Madness X movie review #19" via Cinemassacre @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp_ZCuZHVtk

"I Know an Old Lady" performed by Burl Ives

"Midsommar" produced by A24, et al.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1417280420861812755

It’s Riddick Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey shave their heads and wear welding goggles because Richard B. Riddick is their hero.

The Classic Film: Pitch Black (2000)

"A commercial transport ship and its crew are marooned on a planet full of bloodthirsty creatures that only come out to feast at night. But then they learn that a month-long eclipse is about to occur” (IMDb.com). Pitch Black tries real hard to balance between horror, sci-fi, and action, but it mostly just succeeds in being badass.

The Modern Film: The Chronicles of Riddick (2004)

"The wanted criminal Richard Bruno Riddick (Vin Diesel) arrives on a planet called Helion Prime and finds himself up against an invading empire called the Necromongers, an army that plans to convert or kill all humans in the universe” (IMDb.com). The Chronic-WHAT!?-cles of Riddick leaves much of the horror of Pitch Black behind in favor of existential dread, lore-building, and more ego-stroking, but that doesn't mean it isn't totally radical.

Audio Sources:

"Anya Taylor-Joy/Lil Nas X" (Saturday Night Live S46E20) produced by Broadway Video & SNL Studios

"Beauty and the Beast" (1991) produced by Walt Disney Pictures, et al.

"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" produced by De Laurentiis Entertainment Group, et al.

"Blade Runner" produced by The Ladd Company, et al.

"The Chronicles of Riddick" produced by Universal Pictures, et al.

"Deadpool and Korg React" via Ryan Reynolds @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7q60i_Lh_E

"F9: Fast & Furious 9 - Official Returning To Theaters Message (2021) Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez" via IGN @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsePr4w-3og

"Fuck the Pain Away" written and performed by Peaches

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Pitch Black" produced by Polygram Filmed Entertainment & Interscope Communications

"Robot Chicken: Star Wars Episode II" produced by Stoopid Monkey, et al.

"You're the Best" written by Bill Conti (music) & Allee Willis (lyrics) and performed by Joe Esposito

"Cell Block Tango" (from "Chicago" [2002]) written by John Kander (music) & Fred Ebb (lyrics) and performed by Catherine Zeta-Jones, et al.

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1414385187417325571

CW: Suicide, Stalking

It’s Peeping Tom Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey discuss rear-window ethics and sing Rihanna a little too much.

The Classic Film: Rear Window (1954)

"A wheelchair-bound photographer spies on his neighbors from his apartment window and becomes convinced one of them has committed murder” (IMDb.com). We're back to the Hitchcock classics with one of the holy trinity (according to Chris), a suspenseful thriller that asks, "Will she change for him?"

The Modern Film: Disturbia (2007)

"A teen living under house arrest becomes convinced his neighbor is a serial killer” (IMDb.com). A blatant rip-off of the Rear Window concept (along with three other movies we've covered on the show), Disturbia may not wow, but it's pretty good teen fare at the very least.

Audio Sources:

"Aaron Burr (Advertisement)" produced by Propaganda Films

"Agent for H.A.R.M." (Mystery Science Theater 3000 S09E15) produced by Best Brains

"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" produced by De Laurentiis Entertainment Group, et al.

"Bill Burr/Jack White" (Saturday Night Live S46E02) produced by Broadway Video & SNL Studios

"The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)" written and performed by Ross Bagdasarian

"Disturbia" (Film) produced by Dreamworks Pictures, et al.

"Disturbia" (Song) written by Brian Kennedy, et al., and performed by Rihanna

"Lovin' You" written by Minnie Riperton & Richard Rudolph and performed by Minnie Riperton

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Rear Window" (1954) produced by Alfred J. Hitchcock Productions

"When Harry Met Sally..." produced by Castle Rock Entertainment & Nelson Entertainment

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1411093656367288320

CW: Suicide

It’s the 4th of July on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey kick the tires and light the fires because today is our independence day!

The Classic Film: Independence Day (1996)

"The aliens are coming and their goal is to invade and destroy Earth. Fighting superior technology, mankind's best weapon is the will to survive” (IMDb.com). Okay, we may be pushing the definition of horror with this one, but it still counts! How can we NOT cover the quintessential 4th of July movie?

The Modern Film: I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer (2006)

"A group of teenagers in Colorado find themselves being stalked and killed one by one by a mysterious figure with a hook, exactly one year after they covered up a friend's accidental death” (IMDb.com). In a very surprising turn from the first two entries in the trilogy, a normally okay franchise decided to end everything with one of the worst horror movies we've seen on the show. Just appallingly bad.

Audio Sources:

"Disturbia" written by Brian Kennedy, et al., and performed by Rihanna

"I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer" produced by Destination Films, et al.

"Independence Day" (1996) produced by Twentieth Century Fox & Centropolis Entertainment

"It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)" written by Michael Stipe, et al., and performed by R.E.M.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Reunited" written by Dino Fekaris & Freddie Perren and performed by Peaches & Herb

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1406727190180294656

CW: Suicide, Bullying

It’s Scary Story Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey tell a bunch of unrelated scary stories and might have been dead THE ENTIRE TIME.

The Classic Film: Campfire Tales (1997)

"A group of teens entertain themselves by telling an anthology of famous urban legends with a modern twist; includes make-out-point, monsters, psychopaths, and ghosts” (IMDb.com). Campfire Tales is so forgettable, even the rights holders forgot to distribute it.

The Modern Film: Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark (2019)

"On Halloween 1968, Stella and her two friends meet a mysterious drifter, Ramón, and uncover a sinister notebook of stories” (CBS Films). Like the eponymous books, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark is a legitimately creepy genre installment for all ages and interests. But does that mean it's good?

Audio Sources:

"The Beginning: Making Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace" produced by Lucasfilm Ltd. 

"Campfire Tales" (1997) produced by Campfire LLC, et al.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"S&M Present" (Robot Chicken S01E09) produced by Stoopid Monkey, et al.

"Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" produced by CBS Films, et al.

"Urban Legend" produced by Phoenix Pictures, et al.

"Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story" (from the Original Broadway Cast Recording of "Hamilton") written by Lin-Manuel Miranda and performed by The Original Broadway Cast of Hamilton

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1404265199578714113

CW: Transphobia, Child Abuse, Gaslighting

It’s Father's Day on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey learn the soundtrack to Cats and move houses for you AGAIN! Plus, our spoiler-free thoughts on The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It!

The Classic Film: Stepfather II: Make Room for Daddy (1989)

"After escaping the insane asylum in which he was incarcerated, Jerry Blake (Terry O'Quinn) impersonates a marriage counselor and manages to win over a patient (Meg Foster) and her young son (Jonathan Brandis)” (IMDb.com). Stepfather II is a low-effort and less-thrilling re-hash of the plot beats of the original. You know what? Just watch the original.

The Modern Film: Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)

"The Lamberts believe that they have defeated the spirits that have haunted their family, but they soon discover that evil is not beaten so easily” (IMDb.com). In stark contrast to Stepfather, this follow-up complements the original in a way that few horror sequels do. Watch 'em both together!

Audio Sources:

"Hellraiser" (1987) produced by New World Pictures, et al.

"Insidious: Chapter 2" produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.

"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones

"Stepfather II: Make Room for Daddy" produced by Incorporated Television Company, et al.

"What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?" (1962) produced by The Associates & Aldrich Company