Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys grabs the popcorn and joins the military to shower with mucho pretty naked people and defend humanity against ferocious armies of arachnids.

Listen as Johnny Has the Keys dives deep into the Han river where a ferocious, semi-aquatic beast has emerged because of man's folly.

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys tracks a giant monster from the arctic to DC, and finally, New York... bearing witness to the path of destruction it leaves.

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys journeys back to the seedy New York of yore, where a boy and his brother seek poetic vengeance on the adults who wronged them.

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys assimilates with humankind, seeking women to procreate with in hopes of preserving our race for generations of the future!

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys escorts you into the literary world of Poe and his sublime poem The Raven, for two film adaptations we care to visit nevermore.

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys takes you to an alternate universe where history is similar, yet vastly different, costumed heroes aren't necessarily noble, and we ponder the magnitude of sacrifice needed for the greater good.

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys goes on the lam, escapes the dead, and defends a home of luxurious refuge... perfect it seems, but really nothing more than a massive tomb.

Listen, as Johnny Has the Keys takes you on a mission to Jupiter and beyond, an enigmatic odyssey that questions the very existence of man.

Listen as Johnny Has the Keys journeys to the Carpathian Mountains of Transylvania in search of the very first vampire film.