Purpose Through Pain

When you keep telling yourself the same story, nothing will change. 

In this episode, Joseph James talks all about identity, and how most people prioritize the wrong thing. Changing your identity is something that many people struggle with for a whole lifetime. 

If you want to change your identity, the vision of yourself must change.

How we feel about our own lives is so important. We create an identity for ourselves about how we talk, look, act, and even who we interact with so we can keep up a certain look or idea of ourselves

But when your profession becomes your identity, something certainly needs to change. Joseph experienced this first hand, and in this episode, tells the story of how he was able to change his mindset around this. 

If your identity is work, and if your job changes, your job changes your life feels meaningless. 

In this episode:

• Joseph shares how he had to change his identity twice. Once after a career change, and once after his wife passed away. 
• The steps to take to change your identity. 
• How to know when your identity is no longer working for you. 

Key Takeaways:

• If you want to change your identity, the vision of yourself must change.
• Work should not be your identity.
• Your identity can change, when you put effort into it. 

Tweetable moments:

“Align your future with where you want your identity to be.”

“If I want a different future, I have to change how I think now.”

“Change your mindset, change your world.”

Today is a great day to be above ground. If you’ve ever felt inadequate, insignificant, isolated, unseen, unheard, helpless, lonely, alone, scared, or unsure, then this is the episode for you. 

Nelson Beltijar lost everything he’d ever worked for in the blink of an eye. He went from having a thriving physical therapy business to a life-changing cancer diagnosis that put him in numerous hospitals and left him unable to walk. He has since left his wheelchair, walker, and canes in the past and is now at a place in his life to apply what he’s learned in his victory over cancer to guide people and give them hope through his blog, The Positive Drip. 

In this episode, I sit down with Nelson to take a deep dive into his past battle with cancer, how he restored his faith in God after feeling abandoned in his darkest hour, and why he now considers himself an imperfect soldier for Christ. 

Nelson believes that God has plans for us, and He has made our paths cross today for this memorable conversation that will tickle your ears. 

On This Episode:

• Nelson’s life-changing cancer diagnosis and why he considers that the easy part of his journey
• The genesis of and motivation for Nelson’s blog, The Positive Drip
• How adversity introduces a person to themselves
• The unsuspecting messenger who tested Nelson’s faith
• The point in Nelson’s journey where he realized that he could live and utilizing the power of visualization
• What to do if you’ve truly tried everything to pull yourself out of a hole

Key Takeaways:

• When it comes to adversity, there are only two outcomes. Either you find a way to conquer it, or you crumble beneath it.
• Do not let the silence make you believe that God is not there. 
• We are constantly being evaluated and tested to see if we’re worthy and strong enough to take the steps forward. 
• You don’t have to go through this alone. Surround yourself with friends that truly want to see you win.

Tweetable Moments:

• “Adversity is a word we can’t escape, regardless of your age, your gender, your religion, and your status.” -Nelson Beltijar.
• “It’s hard to see it when you’re caught up in the middle of it, but when you’re forced to hang onto your faith a little bit stronger, and then you come out on the winning end, your roots start to grow even deeper.” -Nelson Beltijar.
• “If somebody is willing to just suspend their disbelief long enough that it’s possible, maybe they’ll have a story of victory too.” -Nelson Beltijar.
• “You will not be faced with a battle that you cannot overcome.” -Nelson Beltijar.

Connect with Nelson:

Website: http://thepositivedrip.com/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ThePositiveDrip

Connect with Joseph James: 

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/meetjoejames

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/

We can’t control our thoughts, but we can control what we do with those thoughts. Growing up, Joseph felt a lot of hatred towards his father and he did not know how to process those thoughts, but he challenged himself to learn. He learned that he couldn’t do positive things if negative thoughts were dragging him down. 

The power of the mind is like a magnet. We can attract or we can repel, it’s up to us. When we attract things, it’s things that we want. Surround yourself with people and thoughts that you want to attract and be like. 

If you want to move on, and stop living the life that you were living or are living,  it all starts with your thoughts.

Key Takeaways:

• When you surround yourself with positivity, positivity will come into your life. 
• Only you can control what you do with your thoughts.
• If you want a healthy life, think positively. If you want a toxic life, think negatively.

Tweetable Moments:

• “What you feed your mind, makes it grow.”
• “The power of the mind is like a magnet.”
• “Create the life you want with your thoughts”

Connect with Joseph James:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/meetjjames

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/252908273026721

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/

Has your kindness been used against you? Then you need to hear this. 

The best revenge is a life well-lived. It is so easy to care for people that we have relationships with and neglect the most important person, yourself. 

In this episode, Joseph speaks with Sarah K. Ramsey about how to design a life that you deserve, after surviving a toxic relationship. Sarah is a life strategist, toxic relationship specialist, dream builder, heart-centered healer, and intuition empowerment expert. She is a best-selling author of the book Becoming Toxic Person Proof and host of the Toxic Person Proof podcast which reaches thousands of listeners around the world.

We can be toxic to ourselves. Toxic relationships are not limited to boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, it can also be with parents, co-workers, bosses, truly anyone who we have relationships with. 

Key Takeaways:

3 ways to heal from a toxic relationship

How to come up with a healing strategy 

A lot of people suffer from Smart Girl/Guy Syndrom - thinking you can fix everything with enough hard work 

Tweetable Moments:

“When people tell you who they are, believe them” - Maya Angelou

“My good behavior does not change someone else’s behavior” - Sarah K. Ramsey

“The best revenge is a life well lived” - Sarah K. Ramsey

“Not letting people steal your power, that’s integrity.” - Sarah K. Ramsey

Connect with Sarah:

Sarah’s Website: https://sarahkramsey.com/

Sarah’s Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bouncebackcoaching

Sarah’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bouncebackbetter/

Connect with Joseph James:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/meetjjames (https://www.facebook.com/meetjjames)

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/252908273026721 (https://www.facebook.com/groups/252908273026721 )

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/ (https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/)

Whether we want to admit it or not, we all need rest. We need to give ourselves a break. 

Those with a workhorse mindset may feel like resting is a negative thing, but it is so crucial. In a previous episode, Joseph talked about Mental, Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual rest.

In this episode, Joseph addresses Social Rest, which can be taking a rest from social interactions, or surrounding yourself with people who energize you. He also addresses Creative Rest and Sensory Rest. 

We are constantly present, following people online and updating people about our lives. We overwork ourselves and under rest ourselves.  

This episode builds on episode 040: Solo | Debunking the “I’ll Rest When I Die” Myth.

Key Takeaways:

• American’s don’t take enough rest time. 
• There are 7 ways to rest.
• When you don’t rest, you burn out and burn yourself out. 

Tweetable Moments:

• “Allow yourself to be artistic for inspiration” 
• “Get into a place where you can shine”
• “Take a rest from your environment”
• “The strongest individuals take a 30-minute break to give themselves a break, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually” 

Connect with Joseph James:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/meetjjames

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/252908273026721

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/

To tackle mental health issues, you need a strategy. This could be talking to a therapist, doing inner work, visualizing, but regardless, there needs to be a strategy. When in the middle of a mental health crisis, it can be hard to see clear and create that strategy. This is where Gordon Corsetti comes in. 

Gordon has come a long way in his mental health journey and uses what he’s learned to help educate kids and adults with their struggles with stress, anxiety, resentment, and worthlessness. He speaks to the unique human ability to change our minds and show how to use tools to acompish that change. 

Gordon is an author, public speaker, and advocate for suicide prevention and mental health awareness, writing regularly on his website mentallyagile.com. He speaks to the uniquely human ability to change our minds and shows how to use tools to accomplish that change. 

While “tough it out” is fantastic advice for someone who already knows what to do and has the ability to do it, Gordon believes that it is impractical and dangerous advice to those with no idea what they are doing.

Whether you have a diagnosed mental illness or are just facing the stresses of everyday life, tune in to hear about Gordon’s experience with depression, self-harm, anti-depressants, and therapy, and learn how you can start taking action today.

On This Episode:

• Gordon’s struggle with depression growing up with good parents and a good childhood
• The impact of having a predisposition for mental illness
• Planning his first suicide attempt and the friend who changed the course of his life
• Gordon’s brutal cycle with anti-depressants
• How he started working with his depression instead of rebelling against it
• The human stress response and why it is not designed for the ongoing stresses we experience today
• The power of visualization and learning how to be content
• Mental agility vs. mental toughness
• Action steps to keep moving forward when dealing with stress, anxiety, and overwhelm

Key Takeaways:

• Depression isn’t usually something you just wake up with one day. It’s a slow and insidious process. 
• Never underestimate the power of simply asking someone, “How can I help?”
• Listen to your doctor when they tell you not to quit your anti-depressants cold turkey.
• The human mind has a significant ability to adapt.
• Don’t judge yourself for not being at 100% every day.

Tweetable Moments:

• “We exist on a spectrum of behaviors.” - Gordon Corsetti
• “If you don’t sleep well, you’re screwed long-term. Nobody operates well off of a lack of sleep.”  - Gordon Corsetti
• “Pain teaches if you’re willing to be a student.” - Gordon Corsetti

Connect with Gordon:

Website: https://mentallyagile.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mentallyagile

Twitter: https://twitter.com/mental_agility

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyagile/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gordoncorsetti/

Email: [email protected] 

Contact Form:

Dealing with unresolved and unhealed trauma from youth is not easy, but so important for personal growth. In this episode, Joseph speaks with Davette Wheat about her trauma from her first love and how she uses numerology to better understand her life purpose.   

She had an amazing childhood and grew up in a family where her parents deeply loved each other, but she found herself in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship. This caused her to become very self-destructive and destructive in her own relationships.

She met her ex-husband in high school. She believed that him being emotionally abusive was just him caring about her. The relationship became abusive, and he hit her when she was pregnant with their second child. She held resentment for him for 14 years. 

After this abuse, and heartbreak from the man she dated after her husband, she realized she didn’t want to take anyone’s bs anymore. She is now a coach for women and is a Christian numerologist. She has found her purpose and reason for life by understanding numbers. Numbers and numerology are all over the bible, and it ties into who we are. There is a reason you were born, and she has found that numerology is the best way to find out. She uses numerology in her past job as a collector and now uses it in her coaching program to help people in a way that will help them. 

On this episode:

• Why your life path number is so important
• How to find your life path.
• Realizing that it is not her job to stay with an abusive man. 
• Realizing that you don’t need anybody. You can function without anyone. They are not your identity
• You can’t change people, only the holy spirit can change people. 

Key Takeaways:

• She didn’t know it was okay to put herself first. 
• She now teaches her daughters to set their boundaries. 
• She didn’t know it was okay to put herself first, but slowly she learned that it is okay. 

Tweetable Moments:

• “A huge thing for me was learning to love myself.”
• “I am grateful to have gone through the fire and to find where the light was”
• “There is so much freedom when you take off that jacket and realize, that was not your identity.”
• “You can want someone to be the best more for someone than they want it themselves”
• “The only way we can influence people is if we change ourselves for the better”
• “Sometimes the best change for people is letting that individual go.”

Connect with Davette Wheat:

Davette's website: https://www.davette.net/

Davette's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DHypnotherapy/

Davette's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davette777/

Women’s Only Facebook Group “Be Boss 777” https://www.facebook.com/groups/beboss777

Connect with Joseph James:

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/meetjoejames

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/

Are you getting rest in every area of your life?

We need rest to live a healthy life. In this episode, Joseph shares tips to get more rest in the three main areas of life, Mental, Emotional, Physical and Spiritual. If you are waiting to rest when you are dead, you are probably going to die early. Rest is the key to health, happiness, and success. Being an entrepreneur, it is very hard for Joseph to take a break. Even when he was physically resting, he was never mentally resting. 

Key Takeaways:

• Why you should be resting Mentally, Emotionally, Physically, and Spiritually
• Tips to resting better

Tweetable Moments:

• “We need rest to live a healthy life. Whatever the case may be, you need to take time to rest.”  

You don’t have to have all the answers to make a difference. Kary Youman is a heart-centered facilitator and mindfulness coach dedicated to creating brave spaces for people to discuss and explore complex topics. 

Facilitating change through workshops on diversity, equity, inclusion, communication, radical kindness, mental health, and mindfulness, he is helping shift the way organizations view their culture and team dynamics. 

He is on a personal mission to empower and inspire others to live their best lives through the virtues of kindness and mindfulness, helping people from all walks of life overcome limiting beliefs that have led to transformational changes both personally and professionally.

Using the humility and perspective that his life experiences have given him, Kary helps his clients discover their purpose and create a more meaningful life. From toxic masculinity and alcoholism to spirituality and meditation, Kary is here to talk about these experiences and how they influenced the course of his life and led him to where he is today.

On This Episode:

• How growing up in a toxic environment changed the way Kary viewed his parents
• The consequences of growing up thinking that only women are allowed to share their emotions
• The surprising gut punch that changed Kary’s life
• The intensity of Kary’s twenties as a functional alcoholic
• How Kary’s spiritual quest led him to a silent ten-day meditation retreat
• The seemingly crazy marketing scam that turned out to be true
• The event that turned Kary into a mental health advocate
• Taking the mysticism out of meditation

Key Takeaways:

• Judgment and animosity make breakthroughs and connections impossible.
• There’s always more to the story.
• When you’re in a dark place, there’s nothing wrong with asking for help, but only you can do the inner healing work.
• Self-love goes a long way.

Tweetable Moments:

• “Sometimes you can get drunk on the positivity because you’re not allowing yourself to experience what you’re experiencing.” - Kary Youman
• “It’s important to bounce back and to have a positive outlook, but sometimes you just really gotta deal with some shit.” - Kary Youman
• “Eventually, if you train yourself to walk through the dark, you start to recognize that you’re the light.” - Kary Youman

Connect with Kary:

Website: https://kyouman.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karyyouman/

Connect with Joseph James: 

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/meetjoejames

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meetjosephjames/