Pynk Spots

Nic talks about the end of Bitchy Shitshow, signs that a relationship isn't healthy, and what's in store for Pynk Spots!

Many of you may be aware from social media but many may not that Callie and I have gone our separate ways and that Bitchy Shitshow is being retired and replaced with Pynk Spots, a solo project by me (Nichole).

The BSS feed will be switched over this week so no need to do anything, except look for the first episode under the Pynk Spots name this Sunday, Nov 15.

Thank you all for this amazing community we’ve shared over the years and I look forward to new adventures ahead with those of you who choose to continue to follow my work.

We dig into Attachment Theory this week, specifically how Attachment Theory can tell us of the measurable impact of capitalism and capitalistic values on children, who end up being messy adults on Tinder. The way we instill rugged individualism in literal babies has lasting effects on our population deep into adulthood.

Poppin Off

Callie pops off about the Chris Evan nude and how he is being treated differently than most female celebrities with leaked nudes (although we’re happy he is generally being treated well). She also talks about how it’s important to give people their privacy during these times.

Joke

If you wear cowboy clothes…

Main Topic: Attachment Theory 101 + How it Ties to Capitalism

We had planned to talk about how capitalistic values have invaded the way we raise children when we listened to the Psychology in Seattle’s Deep Dive series on Attachment Theory (available to patrons only, link here) where Dr. Kirk Honda connects avoidant insecure attachment style to certain parenting behaviors only seen in the West. This information was the perfect pairing for what we wanted to talk about, and we had a lot of fun going through all of it on this week’s episode.

Attachment Theory:

Described as, “behaviors that make up an ‘attachment behavioral system’ that guides us in our patterns and habits of forming and maintaining relationships

Attachment Styles:

* Secure: learned to trust others, have a good sense of self, are comfortable seeking support and comfort* Anxious: learned that they had to demand or seek attention and love from others, often through emotional manipulation* Avoidant: learned that no one would take care of them and that they are on their own* Disorganized: got confusing and conflicting messages as a child, grew up in chaos

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Transcript

Nichole [00:00:27] Hey, everybody.

Callie [00:00:29] Hey.

Nichole [00:00:32] I’m avoidant.

Callie [00:00:34] And I’m anxious.

Nichole [00:00:37] And today we’re bitching about…

Callie [00:00:40] Attachment styles and when this overly individualistic style is forced on young children, we create attachment injury.

Nichole [00:00:51] Yes. Yeah. So we’re doing our favorite thing, which is taking a thing and then using it to bitch about capitalism.

Callie [00:01:02] Yeah.

Nichole [00:01:04] Before we get into that, I think we’re going to talk about Chris Evans briefly and his nudey nudes.

Callie [00:01:11] Yeah. Yeah, so this is just gonna be a very short little pop top today. But I just thought it would be interesting to comment on the different dyn...

We are thrilled to be joined by YouTuber Professor Flowers (Claire Borealis) this week to discuss the history of Whiteness over the last 100 years, and how we can dismantle the construct of Whiteness to move forward.

CONTENT WARNING: We took up way too much space on this episode and we apologize for this misstep. We’ve noticed this as a trend with our collaborations recently and are putting mechanisms into place to prevent it in the future.

Pop Top

Nichole goes off about Bella Thorne and OnlyFans this week, talking about not just the careless actions of the actress, but focusing on the real baddy in the room, OnlyFans itself.

* Has Bella Thorne Really ‘Ruined’ OnlyFans? (RollingStone)

Joke

Can you perform under pressure?

Main Topic: Smashing Whiteness with Professor Flowers

We are honored to be joined by Professor Flowers this week to discuss the concept and construct of Whiteness. She guides us through the recent history of Whiteness in the United States (the last 100 years or so) to talk about this endlessly shifting, neoliberal construct we are faced with today. Then the three of us have a long, meandering talk about Whiteness itself, and how we can all, regardless of our own racial and other identities, do our part in dismantling this power structure around us and exorcising it from our behavior, beliefs, and our beds.

About our Guest Host

Claire Borealis has a YouTube channel called Professor Flowers. This channel creates video essays that analyzes media, such as movies, anime, and other videos. Currently her work is focusing on the discussion of race.

Follow and support her: YouTube | Patreon | Twitter | Instagram

Resources

* White Privilege: Essential Readings on the Other Side of Racism | Paula S. Rothernberg (Book)* How Slavery Sowed the Seeds of American Collapse: America Sold its Soul to Slavery. It’s Still Paying the Price. | umair haque (Medium)* Queering Anarchism (Book – free PDF)

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Transcript

Nichole [00:00:27] Hi, everyone.

Claire [00:00:29] Hello.

We collab with our dear, darling friend Marine from A Privileged Vegan and The Vegan Vanguard podcast about our hair journeys; an episode years in the making!

Poppin Off

This week we go off about the ableist, classist and individualistic responses to the tragic passing of Chadwick Boseman, as well as discussing the body policing he experienced while he was still alive.

Joke

What kind of bird never needs a haircut? (Thanks, Tara!)

Main Topic: Talking short hair, gender and The Patriarchy with Marine!

This week we do a long anticipated collaboration with our dear friend Marine about our various hair journeys and how we feel our hair reflects (or doesn’t) our gender. We pull some great quotes and history facts from the resources linked below, and then dive into our very different experiences. Nichole has found freedom and gender euphoria through her buzzed head; Marine was challenged by the endless policing around her look and ended up not enjoying having short hair as much as she hoped, which created a lot of feminist conflict for her; and Callie speaks on her experience as someone who grew up in a larger body and therefore felt a lot of pressure to have long, feminine hair and obey “fashion rules” about what cut looks good on what face.

Resources

* Laurie Penny on hair: Why patriarchy fears the scissors – for women, short hair is a political statement (New Statesman)* FASHION HISTORY LESSON: THE BOB HAIRCUT, FEMINISM’S ULTIMATE STYLE STATEMENT (Fashionista)* Now You Know: How Did Long Hair Become a Thing for Women? (Time)

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Transcript

Nichole [00:00:27] Hi, everybody.

Marine [00:00:29] Hello.

Nichole [00:00:31] Couple minutes behind today, but we’re here. We’re good. We’re queer.

Marine [00:00:38] Did we mention that?

Nichole [00:00:39] And we’re going to talk about hair.

Callie [00:00:41] Yeah, I was just going to be like, what episode is this again? I could do another comphet, that shit was fun.

Nichole [00:00:48] It was fun. Could talk about that all day. I bring it up all the time.

Callie [00:00:54] Same.

Nichole [00:00:54] I’m like comphet… It’s a plague on our people. So welcome to the Bitchy Shitshow podcast. I am Nichole.

Callie [00:01:12] I am Callie.

Marine [00:01:13] I’m Marine.

Nichole [00:01:15] And today we’re bitching about…

Dexter represents white male exceptionalism to the extreme, and while this leads to poorly written female characters and nonsensical plot-lines structured only to preserve Dexter’s freedom and clean reputation; there is an aspect of the show that Nichole only noticed through re-watching – that it is an amazing representation of life on the spectrum – which makes the show both trash and treasure.

Poppin Off

Callie pops off about prison labor being used to fight fires in California while being paid slave wages and being barred from becoming firefighters or any other type of emergency responder after release. Nichole pops off about the economy in World of Warcraft and how it proves that capitalism doesn’t work, even in virtual environments.

Resources

* @WaywardWinifred tweet about wildfires & prison labor* @soyouwanttotalkabout Instagram post about inmate firefighters in California

Joke

A racist, a homophobe, a transphobe and an anti-semite walk into a bar…. (from @burgundybitch72 on Twitter)

Why do pirates love nipple rings? (from TikTok)

Main Topic: Dexter – White Male Exceptionalism, Autism, Child Abuse

Callie FINALLY (lol) watched Dexter, Showtimes’ 2006-2013 hit series about a serial killer who works for Miami PD as a blood-splatter analyst and only kills other bad guys. Nichole decided to rewatch it so she could join in on the fun, and soon the two found themselves spending many hours sending video messages back and forth about the show and decided, as we often do, to put a mic in front of our faces and turn our lives into CONTENT FOR THE INTERWEBS.

In watching/rewatching, many interesting themes came up for us. Callie garnered a pure hatred of this show for its blatant misogyny and racism, calling it, and I quote, “pure trash.” She also noticed many instances of bad consent, and that many things in the show would have been more compelling if Dexter had been written as, say, asexual and had communicated that to his partners.

Nichole found a new appreciation for the show (while also making copious notes on the misogyny and racism) as the best representation she has ever seen of the autistic experience. It also teased (but did not deliver on) other interesting themes, particularly child abuse and what happens to people with personality disorders when we as a society and/or their parents decide that they are lost causes.

We dissect (hehe, get it!?) all of this throughout this episode, going deep on the ways the show ultimately failed to deliver on anything except white male exceptionalism.

Resources

* Dexter’s Disastrous Ending, Explained | The Take (YouTube)* Dexter Series Finale review | Jeremey Jahns (YouTube)

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We’ve got one of our favorite comrades, Pearson Bolt from the Coffee with Comrades podcast, with us today to talk about security culture. But first, we end up doing a massive ranty Pop Top about Kamala Harris’s win as Biden’s VP pick. Pearson ranted so fervently that Nichole dubbed him an honorary third bitch!

Poppin Off

The three of us GO OFF about Kamala Harris being chosen by Biden for his VP. Nichole pulled some clips of Harris’ past speeches around school, truancy, and crime to highlight how heinous she is and how she is a cop at heart and the literal worst pick for a time that is brimming with anti-cop sentiment.

Resources

* TikTok about superheroes, politicians & fascism* Attorney General Kamala Harris: Innovation & Evolution in our Criminal Justice System (YouTube)* Kamala Harris (1/14/10)* Unpacking Kamala Harris’s Record on Trans and Sex Work Issues (Them)

Joke

What do you call a zombie movie set during the French Revolution? (Thanks for the original joke submitted by comedian Mario Marrufo from the Brocial Cuckstice Warriors podcast on Anchor and Spotify | YouTube channel)

Main Topic: Security Culture / Operational Security with Pearson!

Pearson (he/they) has taught operational security many, many times so he joins us today to do a little security culture and OPSEC 101 with our audience. He covers tips for digital security in your everyday life, particularly if you are organizing online, and then we also go over tips for how to protect yourself in the streets.

Pearson recently did a similar episode on their podcast, Coffee with Comrades (link below), which we also highly recommend! The CrimethInc link below also has great information in writing in one place as an additional reference.

Security culture: a security culture is a set of customs shared by a community whose members may be targeted by the government, designed to minimize risk.

Resources

* Episode 92: “Practice Safe Sec” (Coffee with Comrades)* CrimethInc definition of security culture (Crimethinc.com)* Jail And Court Support (Rebel Steps Podcast)

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Transcript

028 Let’s Talk About Sec, Baby!.mp3Nichole [00:00:26] Hi, everyone. I’m Nichole.

In our continued efforts to get formally diagnosed and seek professional support and services as neurodivergents, we have a LOT of rage about the entire system, particularly how so many medical professionals seem adverse to diagnosis as they don’t want to “label” you or “put you in a box,” even if that’s what YOU want.

Pop Tops

We talk about “fork theory,” a new theory by TikTok-er @catiosaurus) that Callie discovered which is specifically for neurodivergent folks.

Fork Theory (TikTok)

Joke

“I made a hiking playlist with The Cranberries, The Peanuts, and Eminem…” (thanks, sister!)

Main Topic: When Medical Professionals Are Too Lax About Diagnoses

This is a loose, free-form rant about our rage over not being diagnosed because we’ve had medical professionals and healthcare workers who thought “labeling” ourselves was a bad thing and therefore thought our attempts to find a name for our struggles and experiences was a thing to be discouraged. Now, we’re both facing nearly insurmountable barriers to diagnosis and treatment.

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Transcript

027 Diagnosis and labels.mp3Nichole [00:00:27] Hi, everyone. Welcome to Bitchy Shit Show, the podcast. This is Episode 27 in this new adventure we’re on together in the Year of our Lord, 2020. I’m Nichole.

Callie [00:00:43] And I’m Callie.

Nichole [00:00:45] And today we’ll be talking about…

Callie [00:00:55] Today, we are doing a, hopefully cathartic rant about the process to get a diagnosis and why all of this talk over why people have to get a diagnosis is like really fucking ablest and shitty.

Nichole [00:01:15] Yep. And we’re going to connect what we see as a trend with medical professionals who are like, “Who needs a diagnosis? Like why label things, babe?” as fucking infuriating on many levels. So it’s going to be a free form rantisode for all of you, which I know is always a crowd favorite. But first, before we get into that, Callie was going to pop her top, her lovely pink top over a Dr. Drew reaction to a Tik-Tok.

Callie [00:01:51] Yeah. Although, so I was trying to -.

Nichole [00:01:54] Look at how cool your mom’s are by the way. We’re talking about Tik-Tok, we’re so with it.

Callie [00:02:00] Yeah,

This week we go on a loose exploration of body image and gender expression in a time of isolation. We solicited stories from all of you on social media and got a ton of really vulnerable, beautiful responses. As we get further from the “normalcy” of capitalism, we wonder if we will experience permanent changes to how we look at clothes, makeup, hair, comfort, autonomy, and so much more.

Joke: why are frogs always so happy?

Also, fun announcement: Nichole finally got around to updating and finalizing our Patreon tiers so that we are officially NOT offering anything extra, content-wise. We will likely have merch someday when we’re bigger, but we don’t ever want to put content behind a paywall and, frankly, we can’t possibly make additional content right now anyway! In place of free content, she gives you funny, tongue-in-cheek tier descriptions and associated gifs. She’s very proud of herself, this is the epitome of callbacks, deep cuts, and inside jokes. Check it out here: Patreon!

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TRANSCRIPT

026 Body Liberation in Quarantine.mp3Nichole [00:00:27] So hi, everyone. I am Nichole.

Callie [00:00:30] And I’m Callie.

Nichole [00:00:31] And today we’re talking about…

Callie [00:00:33] Body image and body feelings in quarantining.

Nichole [00:00:38] Yeah.

Callie [00:00:39] In quarantine? In quarantine.

Nichole [00:00:41] Yeah. All of those. In lockdown. During a pandemic.

Callie [00:00:47] Except for the one that’s not actually a word.

Nichole [00:00:51] In isolation. Yeah, but first we were going to just do a quick little, I don’t know if it’s like a pop-top exactly, but we’re just going to touch on some current events. Callie, take it away.

Callie [00:01:10] Yeah, yeah. So we just wanted to do a quick little pop off and rage and just document this for posterity, cause, you know, our show’s totes important. But as of this weekend, if you’re watching with us live, you know, it is Sunday, August 2nd, and as of yesterday, the increase in unemployment benefits, the six hundred dollars a week ended with Congress failing to pass an extended stimulus package. In fact, they’re all now on fucking vacation. And a lot of the moratoriums on eviction have also expired. I couldn’t think of the right word. But so now we have, I think the latest estimates are like 40 plus million people that have lost their jobs in this post-COVID economy and 20 plus million people, and I think that was even like a week or two ago so it could potentially be much higher than that, like, cannot pay their rent and are on the verge of being evicted. Their landlords have just been literally having to wait because they were not allowed to throw them out of their homes, which is, I shouldn’t need to tell you,